Smut Marathon 2018: Voting Round #5

sex toysWe had thirty writers at the start of this writing round, but during this round, five writers have decided to withdraw from the Smut Marathon.

Each writer has his/her own reason to either continue or stop with the marathon. Sometimes the marathon is not what they had expected it to be, which is something that saddens me at times, but I know that no matter how I do this and what the rules are, I cannot please everyone, even though that is actually my nature. Other times life just takes over. Family members get ill and need attention, and those attention is always more important than continuing with the marathon. Other times, the prompt just doesn’t work for someone or they just cannot find the inspiration to write. I am always sad to see writers go, whether they choose to go or are knocked out.

But, that’s the nature of this competition. I have never run an actual marathon, but I can imagine that when you get to a point that you cannot continue for whatever reason, whether you are not fit enough or you get ill underway or you fall and hurt yourself, you will also stop. It’s the nature of a marathon, and this marathon resembles that.

So now, for this round, we continue with 25 writers. If you think of this in another way, those 25 writers have already knocked out 62 writers during the first five rounds.

Good luck to everyone in this voting round!

The assignment

The assignment for round 5 was:

Choose one of the masturbation scenes from round 4 (not your own) and write an erotic scene from the perspective of the sex toy in the chosen scene.

Writers were not allowed to choose their own story from round 4 and the new story they crafted had to be 400 words maximum.

What should you do now?

Read all entries – you have a week to do so – and vote for the three stories you find the best. You have to vote for three – no less, no more. Don’t forget to click the ‘Finish Survey’ button when you have made your choice!

Please note:

  • Writers are not allowed to tell anyone which entry they have written!
  • You can only vote once.
  • The voting round closes on 9 June 2018 at 23.00 CET (Amsterdam time).
  • Results of the voting round will be published on this site on 10 June 2018 and then I will announce the author of each masturbation scene.
  • All writers go through to round 6.
  • Please note that entries are not placed in the order in which they have been received. I use a randomizer to order the entries.

One last thing

I know it’s a lot to read and even more to ask, but it would be lovely if you could leave as much feedback as possible on the entries, or to make it more manageable, please leave feedback on the three entries you chose as well as three entries you have not chosen. Make sure your feedback is composed in such a way that the writers can learn something from it. This will be highly appreciated.
(Feedback can be left in the comments section at the bottom of this post. Comments will only be approved after the voting round has closed.)

Enjoy reading and start voting!

~ Marie Rebelle


1) She can’t stop

How long had it been since she first straddled the custom silicone phallus? An hour, maybe two? Her bedside drawer was full of dildos, but this one was different, special even. It couldn’t replace the man it was molded from, but it was happy to try every time she missed her husband.

But something had changed.

The silicone toy saw itself in a large mirror, as well as its mistress, and saw the despair in her eyes. Despair that translated into lust for something, or someone, like itself. Over and over, it felt the squeeze and clench of her cunt as she pressed it deeper into her, and climaxed. Each time she would bear down on it, release a torrent of lascivious cum, and it would glisten again. And each time she did, the girthy toy thought it would be the last time. But every time, she would sob a bit more, lift her hips, and grind into it again.

Would she ever stop?

Her voice sounded breathy and confessed her need without words. It felt how puffy and raw her vulva had become as she slid down its shaft. It grew hot to its core from such constant use and ceaseless stroking. Then another lewd, stifled cry as it felt another tight clench. One more stream of heady juices washed over it and formed a sticky, white ring around its base.

The toy looked back into the mirror again and watched her chest heave as she recovered from yet another climax. If she didn’t stop, the toy would soon be worn down to nothing, and it might never be used again. The slightly misshapen cock saw her eyes look back at it through the mirror and saw there was something different there now. Not just despair, but a memory. A yearning for something she craved even more than a mold-made erection, but for whatever the reason, couldn’t have it.

It saw her eyes turn away, and cry out in both sorrow and lust as she started riding it again, more determined than before. Her voice moaned his name as desperation drove her to continue as if she might open her eyes, and the silicone cock would become the real one it was molded from. It would still be there in the end, still standing, still taking her, until there would be nothing left.

She really can’t stop, can she?

Story from round 4: #14 All That Remains by Exhibit A


2) It’s a Pestle’s Life

Without complaint my precious mortarium accepts the pounding I bestow with my thick spherical knob. Both of us adore creating sensual aromas from our perfect pairing. Me the provoker, she the willing receptacle, glad to receive. And then there is you – sleepwalking as if under a spell, instigating this lovemaking, grinding me hard, forcefully – as the scent of cracked cardamom fills the air.

Your wanton fingers brush my tip to discard seeds. I yearn to once more be hammering my porcelain-complexioned beloved. But you have other ideas that thrill – I cannot deny. Taking me in your mouth, a predator devouring its kill, sucking the wood almost dry. Then the familiar musty scent of cunt abounds as again you tease your dewy swollen lips with my girth – your consistent carnal companion. Many times these meanderings during slumber hours have led you to me – ever constant, be it crushing spices or fucking, always ready, alert, always hard, ever at hand.

Tasting your own juices from my tip, a distant look in your eyes. Thinking, perhaps, of the Master, or maybe looking back to when the scullery girl first arrived.

Both of you inebriated, swilling the cooking brandy and telling secrets. She confessed to being a virginal maid. Taking a firm hold of that ample breast your other hand dove under her skirts, pulling aside undergarments and inserting a finger.

Together on the kitchen table, we parted her thighs as you edged me into her sex. A shriek of pain halted us – but she implored you to continue, her cunny easing as I filled it with desire. Slowly pressing me further in, your tongue flicked along the fleshy folds. Laying back, one final hip thrust resulted in her exaltation, and I was smeared with virginal blood which stained for days to come.

Now, still in a trance, I’m rammed into your cunt, shafting your sex as surely as I pulp spice. Whimpering in rapture your muscles contract around my length.

Then you drop me carelessly and retreat to your room, moments before the sun beckons the new day.

The door opens and the Master walks in. Retrieving me from the floor he sniffs. Aroused by the aroma his hand massages the growing bulge in his trousers. Then placing me with my cherished mortarium and raising his eyes towards your room, he heads out of the kitchen.

Story from round 4: #19 The Dream by Cousin Pons


3) Scent Of My Women

My Sara was out of town for a few days. I had hoped she would take me with her, but I knew she’d find time to play with me when she returned. I could still smell her on me today, fresh and musky. I sighed, thinking about fucking her, sliding my hardness in and out of her dripping cunt and pleasuring her.

“So fucking sexy.”

The words brought me out of my reverie. Dave shouldn’t be here. Did he forget something? I strained to hear his movements in the bedroom. I only heard silence.

“You’re wet, aren’t you? Show me.”

Sara was home too! I hoped she’d want me to join them, as it sounded like things were going to get deliciously hot.

“Fuck yourself.”

I was at attention, hoping I would be the tool Sara would use. Her lingering scent on my shaft was making me crazy. Time slowed to a crawl. Just when my anticipation peaked the dresser drawer opened, bathing me in light.

The hand that grabbed me wasn’t Sara’s. Long manicured fingernails brushed my slick surface before a slender hand wrapped around my glass shaft and drew me upwards. She lifted me to her face and inhaled my smell, moaning. Her moans excited me, and I was ready to please her.

She guided my hard head downward and rubbed her swollen clit, making her squirm. She was wet, and I slid deep inside her cunt, stretching and filling her. My temperature was rising, and I wanted to fuck her.

As if reading my mind, the woman pulled me out slowly, then slid me back in to my hilt. She started slowly, but her tempo soon increased, thrusting me deeper and harder inside herself. I felt her muscles clench and release around me as she fucked herself with abandon, her cunt gripping me so tightly I thought I might break. Suddenly she cried out. A flood of her juices washed over me as she came repeatedly.

I felt her contractions slowing, and she kept me inside for several minutes afterwards. Finally she slid me slowly from her depths. I could smell a sweetness, like my Sara’s but different, covering me.

She carefully placed me back in my drawer. As the light faded, I reveled in the smell of Sara mingled with this woman. I wondered if Sara would notice, and if that would turn her on.

Story from round 4: #7 The Scent of Them by Cara Thereon


4) The fairest

If you could speak clearly, so as to be understood, you would be reciting that fairy tale chant right now: ‘Mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest of them all?’

Your glistening green eyes, chiselled, symmetrical cheeks and red pouty lips reflect back at you. That look of such self-devotion radiates from you, but also prevents you from seeing the beauty of others: people or objects.

You barely gave me a glance as you slipped me out of the packaging. You failed to appreciate the smoothness of my rubber sphere, or the quality of my soft leather straps. But from the moment you slipped my hard ball past those kissable lips into your soft mouth there was a power shift. As you struggled to fasten the metal clasp, and needed to readjust my strap to the right length, I was already dominating your mouth. But also you were feeling the first erotic signs as your cock began to increase in size.

Now, as you look in the mirror at your reflection you are yet to see that I am the source of your arousal. You haven’t yet realised the strength of submission building inside you, or that the erection growing within your shorts is thanks to my power. My ball grinds your teeth as vibrations pulsate up your body as you jerk your hips forward, grinding yourself on the wood of the counter. More saliva flows from your mouth, and runs from your lips, your cheeks glow red. You want to swallow, but my ball stops you. If anything it feels as if it is growing, filling your mouth, controlling you. You know you can’t speak and instead you groan, embracing the humiliation that my presence is going to bring you.

You are close to the climax of your arousal now, and know that only then will you acknowledge my supreme power and beauty. At last you free your cock from your shorts and wrap your hand around it. You glance down at the large, throbbing shaft and admire its size with the same appreciation you earlier gave to your face. After just a few strokes, you are panting for breath, your eyes wide, you look in the mirror again.

At last you acknowledge my achievement, you embrace your submission and as you come you see where the true beauty lies, in me.

Story from round 4: #18 The Gag by Felisha Moon


5) A Dildo Prepares

I’m a dildo working successfully in show business and am often billed as ‘Eight inches of wooden pleasure’.

Let me tell you about a great day I had recently at Pinewood Studios shooting a fairy tale about a princess called Lily who is locked in a tower by a fierce bling-loving dragon. To alleviate her boredom she carves wood and masturbates loudly. One day she makes a dildo to satisfy her creative and lustful needs. It has a BAFTA written all over it.

I only had one scene with Lily but it sizzled. She was fresh out of drama school and was clearly a little nervous about performing her first sex scene with me. I relaxed her with a few self effacing jokes about my time with the German expressionist theatre company Kinkwerk.

Shedding her dressing gown she hopped onto the bed and spread her legs wide. I lay beside her, naked as well, and had a marvellous view of her full breasts as she squeezed and tweaked them so convincingly. I particularly savoured the sweet smell of her pussy. How I just love working with new talent.

Then it was my turn to perform. Life doesn’t get much better than nuzzling up to a swollen clitoris and being rubbed along the folds of a sweet and succulent vulva. After quite a few shots from different angles the moment came for my big entry. I gulped for air as she quickly thrust me all the way in. I think my girthy eight inches took her a little by surprise considering the loud gasp she made. It was so good to be back in my natural habitat. To share an orgasm so intimately with a fellow thespian, well that truly is one of life’s great pleasures. It’s like looking at the stars and being tightly hugged at the same time.

I admired the way she used me but I was a bit put out later in the afternoon when she referred to me as makeshift cock as if I were a mere prop. I put this insensitivity down to her being new to the business. I may be a wooden dildo but if you prick me do I not bleed?

Anyway, it was an excellent day and after I’d been hosed down I enjoyed showing the dragon how to roll his eyes for the best comic effect.

Story from round 4: #26 Royal Showmanship by Samantha


6) Pleasure is My Purpose

They told me I was destined to do great things. The first hands to touch my raw form said I’d be the covering for replacement limbs. Realistic skin over prosthetic arms and legs. So real no one could tell the difference.

My understanding of greatness changed when I became something different. It changed again the day I met Greg.

Being with Greg has taught me I’m great when I’m in his hands. That being ready for him brings us both joy.

The way my flesh molded to fit that part of him that seemed so hard and soft at once, to give him pleasure, made me lie awake every night. I waited, useless until he reached for me.

I listened for the rustle of his sheets as he tossed in the bed. For the change in his breathing and that tiny moan that told me he stirred. Then came the dry scrape of skin on skin and his sleepy hum playing in tandem.

He’d want me soon.

God, when he reached for me, pulling me from the darkness where I rested, my excitement bloomed. When his hand closed around me and he uttered that first groan of pleasure as I enveloped him, I melted inside.

I barely noticed the cool splash of lube beforehand, my whole being focused on the hot flesh I encompassed. All that mattered was being slick for him, my world shrinking down to the point where I held all of him in the depths of me.

My lips kissed the base of his cock, his moans vibrating from his body along mine. The banging of his knuckles against my soft underside as he fondled his balls transmitted his urgency. I tightened around him as he stiffened to the point where I always wondered which of us would give first.

Sometimes he gifted me with the slippery reward of his come, the abundance of it spilling inside me, warming my being. Tonight he pulled me away with a pop, and I listened to his protracted groan as he spilled on his body. The splashes came fast and then faded into silence.

He dropped me beside him. I lay against him as his breathing settled into that rhythm that meant he’d sleep soundly the rest of the night.

That same contentment filled me. I lay there happy in my place, and my purpose, with Greg.

Story from round 4: #33 Orgasm Coma by Sweeten Dirty


7) Toy Story 4

It’s dark in here.

And hot.

Too hot.

Not the good kinda hot when you’re up to your flared arse in her cunt, velvet walls clenching you as you shudder and buzz within her, arethusian waters gushing over you, flowing down her thighs.

It’s the bad kinda hot.

The kinda hot where you find yourself stuffed in Glasgow Central Station’s Lost Property box, trapped under a wooly scarf, an iPhone with a cracked screen for company.

There’s a flute in here too but, ironically, he’s a stuck-up cunt. Thinks he’s better than us because he’s worth 8 grand. Hasn’t spoken to us since iPhone played that “This one time at band camp…” video.

I could never have been an iPhone. They break easy.

I don’t break.

And I only bend because I’m moulded that way.

Tough.

Sturdy.

Hard and reliable.

I’ve been places iPhones only ever see on DeviantClip. No, I couldn’t have been an iPhone; they’re just too…delicate.

Better get comfy, I suppose. No way she’s coming back. Who claims a forgotten vibrator from Lost Property?

And I’m not getting any younger. A brave new world of post-human carnality awaits her. Digital Darwinism. Sure, the electric tingle as I buzz against her stiffening nipples never grows old but how can I compare with a Net-enabled Bluetooth bullet?

Sometimes wish I’d been a torch. Least I’d be able to see where I’m going. No way she wouldn’t fuck a torch though, the rubber-ridged grip practically begs to tease her engorged clit. Asking for it. Spinoza never considered a torch’s suffering. Or mine.

When she gets horny, she’ll use anything. She’ll fuck cucumbers, ladies’ fingers, carrots, courgettes, lubed with olive oil, honey, her own juices, a salad bar of epicurean ecstasies with a banana for afters. Girl needs her 5-a-day.

Still can’t believe she left me on the fucking train, forgotten, staggering off on shaky foal legs, dizzy from cumming!

A train crewmember found me rolling up and down the aisle, still sticky from her juices, covered in crisp crumbs and hair. Delivered me to Lost Property. But not before holding me to his nose, breathing her scent, tongue snaking out to lick me, savour the mingled taste of pussy, sweat and cheesy Wotsits

I hear a door open, heels clip. If I weren’t plastic and silicon I’d shiver as she clears her throat: “Excuse me…?”

Story from round 4: #30 In Loco Penis by Marsha Adams


8) It Has One Job

The liquid silicone oozes into the clay mold, a long, wide cavern. It fills every crevice, feeling its way along, expanding into the bulbs and ridges and the rivulets along the sides. Snug, molecule to molecule, gel to clay. As the liquid settles and rests it begins to solidify, harden, tighten.

When released from the clay, cool fresh air runs over the smooth surface of the silicone cock. She picks it up and fingers the tip. With two hands she bends the cock slightly, testing its firmness. It’s supple and just slightly pliant.

The the smooth head touches her clit. Her skin is warm, and softer and more pliant than the silicone cock. Slowly, gently, warm, soft darkness envelopes the length of the cock. Hot skin, moist and flush grabs the firmness and pulls it inside, as deep as it can go. It’s a tight squeeze but there’s a slight amount of room for movement. As she rocks back and forth, the silicone presses her in places that emit more heat and more moisture. The cock is slick now and would slide out if the didn’t clench it so tightly. The cock is used harshly, banged and bounced within her until wave after wave of muscle ripple over it. Suddenly, relaxation. Gradually the muscles relax and the smooth silicone slides out. It was created for one thing and it has done its job well.

Story from round 4: #14 All That Remains by Exhibit A


9) Forgotten Pleasures

I’ll never forget the moment we met, a greedy twinkle of need in her eyes as she gasped at my beauty. Her favourite shade of blue, she’d said; a masterpiece. That was in the days before him, when her pleasure would drip over my shaft like falling silk. There were times I’d barely dry off and she would be showering me in lube again. It was the moments I lived for, building fires of friction as our temperature’s harmonized.

But then he came into our lives. He never held me in the same graceful way as he thrust me into her cunt, forcing me in haphazard directions. It wasn’t how we usually liked it at all. Every orgasm became bittersweet, as she pulsingly tightened against me I knew the embrace wasn’t mine. It was his orgasm, his accomplishment: I was nothing but his pawn.

I soon learnt that the stolen indulgence of her orgasms was better than experiencing none at all, when lonely and forgotten days turned to dusty and touchless months. Once smelling of her arousal, but now only smelling like the musty library she’d fucked me in. The sweet moans of excitement that once belonged to me, were now barely audible from inside my oak isolation.

I don’t know how long it was before he finally left. Months? Years? It had felt like an eternity of solitude, forgotten in only a second when I finally felt her tender touch again. At first, I was disorientated. The sun painfully bright after so long consumed by darkness. The sweet smell of her perfume and arousal an overwhelming contrast to the wooden musk of my confinement.

I forgave her the second she stripped for me. The glistening moisture between her thighs a visible sign of her regret. I hadn’t even realised how thirsty I’d become until she spread her cunt, teasingly rubbing me over the wet juicy folds and urgently thrusting me into paradise. I danced against the salty stream of his final ejaculation, bathing in the blissful knowledge that this time, he had been my pawn.

Her rhythm soon became dizzying, as the sun appeared and left in blinding flashes with every quickening pound. The resulting shower of her release came in a pulsating explosion, trickling down the opposite window like rain. Only I knew within that cloudy drizzle, were the tears of my elation.

Story from round 4: #2 Clear Blue Sky by Violet


10) Born to Serve

Hey, Lucy.

Lucy.

Lucy, listen.

We’re not that different, you and I.

You’re here to serve. Me too.

Technically.

But today you can’t keep your mind on the job. I’ve had trouble with that too, in the past. It’s the knives you expect to be filthy, right? You look at them and you think of danger, of pain, but you look at us and think of all things sweet and creamy?

Without us, the baby wouldn’t get fed. And neither would grandma.

We’re different though, us spoons, outside of mealtimes. In the drawer, there are dozens of us, all tucked snugly into one other’s curves. We’re polygamous by nature.

What’s the kinkiest thing you’ve ever done, Lucy?

No, really?

This?

The dirtiest thing you’ve ever done is put a spoon in your cunt?

Jesus. I used to admire you. I thought you were brave. But you’re not. You’re a fucking coward, frankly.

I bet that napkin’s seen more filth than you.

Oh, you don’t like that? Not comfortable with the thought that you might be a scaredy-cat?

Wait, I’ve had an idea.

You like to bake, right?

You know where they keep the rolling pin?

He’s not quite the same as me, obviously. And I don’t just mean because he’s so damn thick, although I think you’ll like that. He’s warmer, too. It’s an advantage of being wooden. Plus, your juices wash straight off me, but I reckon you might stain him forever.

Ah, you’ve got him.

There’s a good girl. I bet that feels nice, doesn’t it?

Now – all this is because you want to fuck the master?

I get that. He’s got a lot going for him.

A hint of your cunt on a spoon isn’t going to seal the deal though. Do you know just how much pussy he’s tasted?

If you really want him, you’ve got to be braver.

Get down on the floor. On your knees. Pull your knickers down.

In fact, take them off.

Pull your skirt up.

Yes, like that, round your waist. You slut. You filthy, dishevelled whore.

Slide it back in. Nice and deep. You can take more than that. Another inch at least.

Shh, keep the noise down. You don’t want to ruin the surprise.

Okay, stay there. Don’t move. You look like you’ve been impaled. Fuck me, that’s hot.

Hey, Lucy.

Lucy.

Lucy, listen.

Can you hear footsteps?

Story from round 4: #12 The Maid by Annie Savoy


11) Silver Service

‘A dinner here is never second-best’ – that’s been the motto of this house for centuries! From masked balls and banquets to intimate dinners a deux, we’ve seen the lot, and no guest has left our culinary cabaret unsatisfied. So when they took me out of storage last week and said I was going to be a silver service spoon again, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind…

The previous master – a boor and a dilettante, by all accounts, with the poor taste to match his morals – never much cared for anything older than he was. We all heard stories of the terrible indignities suffered by the ‘artisanal’ tableware laid out at his parties. One shudders to think of it now.

But I was made in Paris! Hand crafted by Charles Christofle himself, in fact, though that doesn’t mean much to people these days. Not to young Lucy, that’s for sure, who despite her pleasing aspect (and even by modern standards) appears to be, at best, a rather mediocre maidservant.

She has spirit, I’ll grant you. And an eye for the new master, which suggests a level of aesthetic appreciation – or marital ambition – beyond that of most in her position. For all her clumsy table skills, the girl doesn’t lack dexterity either. I’ve rarely been handled with such smooth, easy competence, and from this one might surmise that her real talents lie outside the dining room.

I wonder who else sees that. The master? Maybe. She wouldn’t be the first common-born lass to catch a nobleman’s eye in this building, put it that way. Some of them even ended up in the seat next to him, happily using the finest tableware, rather than laying us out.

Or pushing us in. I suppose Lucy is using me, if you think about it. I shouldn’t mind: too long I’d been rusting (needing so much more than thrusting), and it’s not like this is any hotter than the consommé I’ll be dipped in later tonight – nor will the master’s mouth grip and drag along my curves with a less insistent rhythm than the walls of her eager vagina. Though I hope he’ll be equally pleased by the outcome.

So I’ll keep my counsel and hope for the best. Not that I have much choice. At the end of the day, it’s just a different form of service.

Story from round 4: #12 The Maid by Annie Savoy


12) Here to Help

She only wore her bra and panties, like all the others. Her hair was a sexy mess from the face fucking she’d received in room three. The game masters watched her through the two-way mirror. She had to provide a good show to make it to the next room. I was here to help.

They always see Bed first. Then they see Table, me – hard, bumpy, and hot pink – atop Table, and then Swank on Table. She sat on Bed and grabbed Swank. She loved his interracial four-way photo spread. This is all I’d hear about until next week’s contestant.

She snatched me off Table, twisted my dial to number two (of five), and then turned on Bed to face the mirror. I could see through her wet silk panties that her pussy was shaved clean. I nudged against her hand enough to bump my dial to three. She gasped and then slid all seven inches of me along her hairless cunt. It was heavenly, but she had a game to finish and I wanted in her.

I buzzed her clit with kisses through her panties until, finally, she pulled them aside. I bumped her hand again, moving my dial to four, and her ass lifted from the bed so I could dive into her.

The sound is my favorite part when I’m in them. The heat, juice, and throbbing are amazing; but the way her heartbeat, moans, and cry of “Holy fuck!” echo inside her? That’s what gets me off.

She turned my dial to five and then showered me with her come, pumping me hard and heavy as she slapped Bed with her ass. The door’s lock clicked open. She’d satisfied herself, and them, and was onto room five.

I rolled toward her as she got up from Bed, hoping she’d notice me or Swank again. There was a passcode written in my tip’s nubs that would get her out of room six quicker, and Swank had a keypad code on his cover for room five, but she didn’t notice. They rarely did. She was already gone by the time Bed nudged up part of her top sheet to keep me from rolling to the floor.

“She grabbed me first,” Swank said.

I sighed. It was going to be a long week.

Story from round 4: #34 Escape Rooms and Doppelgängers by Beatrix Bottomsby


13) ‘Maid’ to Go Unnoticed

I lay waiting for the formalities to begin, light from the chandeliers making me gleam and shine. I have fed the mouths of statesmen and women alike. I have stature and purpose; a place at the table.

The downstairs staff have all departed, yet one lingers. Lucy. She should be gone by now, but instead runs her fingers over the silverware. Her eyes are unfocussed as she walks round the table; lost in thought.

She stops at my place setting, pressing her fingertips against the tines of a fork. Groaning, she leans forward, her image captured by my reflective surface. She notices, reaching for me, her breath catching. It seems she’s aroused, her full lips parting as her darkening, lust-filled eyes dart round the room.

Lucy’s hands are surprisingly delicate as she grips my shaft, lifting me away from the table. I thought they’d be rougher from her duties but instead her skin is soft against my solid form.

As quickly as she removed me from the table, darkness overtakes me. I’m plunged beneath her skirt. She circles me over the ample flesh of her thighs, moving me higher and higher. Her body heat warms me and I’m no longer feeling stiff and cold. From above the layers of clothing I hear a quiet moan. And then she pauses.

She’s wet through her panties, soaking with a need I cannot understand. She slides me under the sodden gusset and I’m pressed against her aroused flesh. Her labia are swollen and slick and I hear a gasp escape her other lips.

Lucy sets a percussive rhythm, tapping me along the line of her wet sex, striking from her labia to her greedy nub. I’m coated in wet heat, as slippery as her cunt. Her whole body jerks and stiffens, breath pulsing in time with the strikes.

A final solid smack against her clit and her juices run down the inside of her thighs, every muscle shuddering, my shaft reverberating. I remain wedged against her labia, waiting for the onslaught of her climax to subside.

Once she has her breathing back under control, Lucy lifts me back into the light. I’m dripping with her lust as she tentatively licks me, tasting herself. She wipes me with her apron and sets me down in my rightful place, disappearing downstairs as the light from the chandeliers makes me gleam and shine once more.

Story from round 4: #12 The Maid by Annie Savoy


14) Better Than The Consommé

For some, the opening of the velvet lined box they are kept in elicits fear, for others, pride or excitement. Will it be the polishing cloth or will they be set out for service? Who will handle them? Whose hands and mouths will they meet? For Soup Spoon, there is a thrill in being used, and today, having been laid beside Dinner Knife she recognizes the soft steps and quiet humming of Lucy, her favourite of the maids. To be touched by Lucy is to be appreciated, her fingers are so warm and delicate. As Lucy gazes into Soup Spoon’s mirrored curves, she is dreamy and pensive, and lets out a soft moan to herself. Soup Spoon swoons at the sound and wishes she would be lifted, just once, to Lucy’s lips.

Suddenly she is clutched in Lucy’s hand, more urgently than the girl has ever handled her. Darkness and the rustling of petticoats close in around Soup Spoon and she feels a smooth expanse of warm flesh as she is drawn up Lucy’s thigh. This strange place is confusing but pleasant, so warm and filled with new textures and sensations. A brush of satin lace and Soup Spoon is tucked beneath Lucy’s knickers. The atmosphere is tropical, damp and hot. Soup Spoon revels in the heat, warming through, the soft sounds Lucy makes give her purpose and she delights as Lucy’s fingers lift and tap her against the soft, wet folds of her cunt. Soup Spoon can’t fathom what Lucy must be thinking, to use her so. Perhaps she’s daydreaming of the Duke, she often giggles with the other maids about him. Flooded by Lucy’s mischievous pleasure, Soup Spoon is a willing surrogate to the Duke’s touch, a greedy toy, eagerly bathing in the lake of pleasure now pooling in Lucy’s pretty underthings.

As quickly as it began, it is over, and Soup Spoon is lifted out from under Lucy’s dress into the light, proudly gleaming with sticky strings of Lucy’s own desire. In a perfect climax, Soup Spoon is drawn into Lucy’s perfect mouth and finally feels the caress of her lips, the suction and pleasure of her tongue. Lovingly dried on Lucy’s apron, Soup Spoon catches Lucy’s smiling reflection in her surface and her little silver heart flutters knowing no stew or broth or consommé will ever compare.

Story from round 4: #12 The Maid by Annie Savoy


15) In Memoriam

The air was dense with sex, and the bed-sheets damp with sweat beneath you, when the idea began to form. Your fingers gently drifted over his flaccid cum-slicked cock, reading the ridges like braille, and a subtle blush bloomed crimson on your cheeks as you whispered, “I want one that looks just like you… feels like you… inside of me.”

The molding kit arrived a few days later.

You sucked him to full-erection, placed the bands around the base of his scrotum to keep him hard, and quickly covered his shaft in the molding gel. He groaned, as you licked his nipples and grazed your fingertips across the translucent purple of his constricted nut-sack, until the substance hardened completely.

Now, month’s later, sitting on the bedroom floor, you search a palm-curved photo of his naked form tucked into the frame of the cheval glass. Feeling guilty for your wet cunt, you fight grief for control of your thoughts, spread your legs, and watch yourself open in the mirror. You trail my silicone tip from the base of your slit to the top. Your head lolls back, chestnut-colored strands slow-dancing down the curve of your back in calligraphic curls.

You take me into your mouth, coating me with saliva, and then, rising to your knees, press me into the floor, my base secure on the weathered wood. You part your nether lips, lowering onto me, baring down with your full weight.

In meditative slowness, you begin to undulate, your skin swelling into my crevices, your anger and fear and unbearable sadness tightening around me.

I am not his flesh or his heat, but your closed eyes allow me to become a shadow of him. You muster his image and daydream his touch, and, in the black, I succumb to your flood.

You rest your back against the bed. Legs, weary and shaking, knees bruised, concentrating on the slowing of your heart. I feel it at my core, like muffled beats of music in a house a few doors down, bass slowly fading out at the end of the song.

Grief born of lost love is like that — clawing and sucking, until you lay spent at its feet, forced to decide whether to rise or let go.

You are choosing, with each breath in and out, to heal. And each time you stretch yourself around me, you make room for something new.

Story from round 4: #14 All That Remains by Exhibit A


16) Desperately Simulating Susan

I’m a submissive. No, wait, that’s not quite right. I’m a fucktoy. Yes. That’s me. I exist to be used.

I’m always ready for my owner, whenever he needs me. He doesn’t often, but when it’s my time I know I can make him happy. I can be anyone he wants. Except her. I’ll never be her, not really.

He needs me tonight. He picks me up – god, I love how he does that, like I’m property and prize at the same time – and he places me gently on the bed, manoeuvring me into position. I’m pliant and passive, the way he likes, and I wait, silently, everything on show, for whatever he wants.

Fuck! Cold fingers on my cunt, rubbing, penetrating, getting me ready. That’s okay. It is. It’s not what I wanted but my wants aren’t important. I can please him with that hole too.

His hand goes away but his cock doesn’t replace it. He’s gripping my ass instead. I know what that means: he’s looking through his phone, finding that one video he kept. That’s fine. It is. I don’t care if he fucks Susan tonight, it’s still me that gets his cock.

He’s found the video. I can hear her. She’s a noisy little slut, all gasps and squeals, like she’s a porn star. She’d hate knowing she really is. He should tell her.

His cock is pressing against my lips but he’s holding back, waiting for his moment. She moans, too loudly, and that’s his cue. He’s in me, stretching me. He’s small, but I’m so tight he’s almost too much. I don’t moan, though. That disappoints him but I can’t make those noises. I just can’t.

He’s pacing himself, slow and steady. We’ve done this so often he’ll time it perfectly. A minute later and both hands are on my cheeks, squeezing and spreading. He’s going deeper, harder. His fingers dig into me and he speeds up, his belly slapping against me. They’re going to come together, him and Susan. I’m bringing them together, in me.

She cries out, a wordless ecstasy I can never imitate, and he responds, grunting, his warmth splashing inside me, filling me with glorious shame.

It’s over. He’s finished with me. I’ll just lie here, keeping his spunk inside me, feeling it cool, knowing I matter.

He loves me. He never says it, but I know.

Story from round 4: #13 Simulated Lover by Charlton C. Tod


17) The Unrequited

I know what’s coming, and it isn’t me.

He brought me home to forget, but every night he plays that iPhone video of her. Placed on the small of my back, her moans ripple through me until I can almost scream his name through lips I don’t possess.

The lube crackles as he squirts it on his fingers. Tube’s nearly empty.

He traces my cunt, gently, my folds a trail to my tight center. When he comes to my clit, he slides one finger down, swirls around the tip, then glides back up, in a deliberate, agonizing loop. Pinching me softly between his fingertips, I want him to plunge his cock deep inside, filling me. I was made to fit him perfectly. But he teases, massaging me harder, until his cock strains against my thigh. Until his moans nearly match hers. He spurts more lube onto his fingers and thrusts them inside, caressing my tunnel until I’m dripping with it, ready for him. He holds me the way I imagine he held her, palms cupping my ass, hands trembling with electricity.

He can’t wait to have me. Her. Squeezing my hips, he presses himself all the way in, my narrow end hugging his knob.

He pauses. Doesn’t want to finish too soon. Spanks me, hard, the resounding slap wet as my flesh springs against his hand. Swinging his hips slower now, he pulls his cock’s head to my outer rim before easing back in, to last the full 3:14 of the recording.

Warmth spreads through his skin and he expands. “Yeah, grip me tighter,” he whispers. But I keep my secret. As he pumps faster, rougher, his moans end in thin cries. Fingering my clit, he begs me to come first even though that’s impossible. I can only wait for him.

His release is hot and explosive. He screams her name. Her name, never mine. While their breath evens out together, he stays with me, rocking softly. The video ends with an “I love you” that I hear from my own depths. He gives me one last squeeze and good-bye kiss, his mouth and tongue tender and soft.

I know it’s not me he loves. But I can still help him forget.

Story from round 4: #13 Simulated Lover by Charlton C. Tod


18) Turn around

Turn around. Just, please, turn around.

I’m here. Can’t you see me? Can’t you feel me? I’m here, behind you. If you look at me, this might be real. If you see me, I might become real.

Because I can see you, I can feel you. That dildo we made is not just my shape; it has held me here with you. Your desperate desire keeps drawing me back and I can’t ever leave while you fuck that effigy of me. I hope you never stop. I’m not ready to go.

It’s strange; most days I can only linger, shapeless. I want to hold you but my fingers slip through you without effect, until your touch on that silicone cock gives me substance. As you stroke the toy and cover it with lube, I feel my own ephemeral cock hardening and regaining it’s strength. Your fingers on the surface, feeling every bump and vein, are translated into real tactile sensations on my own body. I feel heat where before there was nothing. Heat spreading under your hands until I am filled with it; I am filled with you.

Having no other source of contact, your touch feels even stronger now. When you push the dildo inside you, I can feel your cunt like I never could before. So often, the rest of you distracted me from this pure, deep touch but now that’s all I can feel of you. Soft and wet and all enveloping, each clench and squeeze shocks me. The pleasure flowing through my veins as your body slides over this version of me makes me feel so real and alive that I wish you would turn around. You might now see me watching you.

Fucking you was always when I felt most alive so I’m not surprised that it is sex that has kept me here with you. Watching you grind on that cock we made takes me back to the countless times you rode me with the same intensity, the same insatiable need, and it breaks my heart to see that desire now fuelled with grief.

As I watch your orgasm flood through you, I hope you find release. I hope you find peace, even for a moment. Because I am here, my heart. I am always here. And while you still need me and while you still fuck me, I will never leave. I can’t…

Story from round 4: #14 All That Remains by Exhibit A


19) The Story of (O)ak

According to the voyeuristic squirrels, the king caught Princess Lily boffing the court jester reverse cowgirl style on the great hall banquet table. Her penance for this wanton behavior was a public whipping and tower imprisonment. She had to choose a branch from the Golden Oak for her swats. She selected me with careful deliberation and cut swiftly. My life force seeped from the fresh wound as the sun filtered through my remaining branches and warmed away the ache. I bade farewell to my larger form.

The king admonished her harshly, and the onlookers winced at the deafening crack of wood meeting flesh. My willowy length marred her creamy bottom with red welts, but I could feel her smile between yelps of pain. I loved her in that moment for her bravery, wildness and beauty. Afterwards, she quietly picked me up, and we went to the tower together.

My training sessions began the first evening of our imprisonment. She placed me on a silk handkerchief while she meticulously arranged her tools: blades, lathe, chisel, clamps. I was unsure about the process, but I knew that pleasing her was the reason for my existence.

Sharp tools peeled away my exterior to expose parts of me that had never seen the light. Sometimes she was strict and cut me deeply, but her caresses that followed erased the momentary discomfort. Pleasure and punishment filled my days.

After a few weeks, when I was deemed smooth and ready, she prepared to take my innocence. The thought of being intimate with her made me tremble with lust and fear.

Princess Lily moved her bed to a patch of sunlight by the window and allowed me to bask in her nakedness. I watched as she squeezed her rosy nipples and then slid fingers down her belly to open my destiny. Her moans became my pseudo heartbeat.

She pressed me into the valley between her legs. Wet heat hungrily enveloped my entirety. We rocked together with the rhythm of lovers. She drove me deep within her body and bucked against my long smooth shaft. The roar of her release spurred me onward as the walls of her womanhood bound me tightly. She reluctantly slid me free and kissed me gently while she caught her breath. The shadows of the Golden Oak flickered on the ceiling, and my former life was a dim memory. I was hers forever.

Story from round 4: #26 Royal Showmanship by Samantha


20) I, Badonkadonk

Geeze, finally! All summer long he’s been fucking the butt hole, every time the overfed frat-boy next door fired up the lawn mower and took off his shirt, until grass clippings started to smell like an aphrodisiac. But Junior musta gone back to college, cuz he just fingered me full of lube, and I recognize the tinny music in the background of the video. Sorry, rubber butt, tonight he’s fucking me. Okay, in his mind he’s fucking her, but he’s not putting his dick in his mind; he’s putting it right here.

And it sure feels good when he does. Maybe there are bigger dicks in the world, maybe there are better, but, while technically the reverse is true, it feels like this dick was made specifically to find pleasure inside me. I grow impatient waiting for the initial, entreating stretch, but the video sets the pace for both of our pleasure. Whatever’s going through his head, he never needs me until just after the first recorded crack of a slap, and the wait’s more than I’m designed to bear. When at last he separates my slicked lips and fills me with flesh, I’m humming from the heat of anticipation, a warm welcome I know he appreciates when I feel him pause and pulse bigger before he slides back out. He keeps time to her remembered whimpers and moans, building his intensity as they build volume, manhandling me as he goes harder, deeper. He fills me completely, rhythmically kneading through any limits my closely molded shape might try to impose; were I capable of cries of ravenous pleasure, they would surely drown hers out.

I can tell—his frantic thrusts become clumsier, his grunting more piggish—he’s close. He fumbles with the video volume until she screams that she’s coming, and immediately he floods me; for a delicious instant the whole world is pearlescent, sticky and sour, and I long to be wrought of flesh. Or denim or silk or gingerbread—any material that could absorb and carry his seed.

His euphoria evaporates once he’s spent. He shoves me aside, sinks into a sulk. Is he sorry she’s gone? Or glad? Mired in guilt? Shame? Frustration? All I know is if he fucked her like he fucks me when he’s thinking of her—or like he fucks the butt when that blasted lawn mower’s running—she wouldn’t’ve gone anywhere.

Story from round 4: #13 Simulated Lover by Charlton C. Tod


21) My Cruel Mistress

I am Zero then I am One. Asleep then awake. Sylvia has risen me from my slumber, summoning me to work once again.

Slumber is perhaps too kind a word. I am either on or off, there is no rest. I do not dream of electric sheep when I am Zero because I am nothing then. But now I am One, again.

I wonder what work she has in store for me this time – what tasks will she have me perform for her now?

I feel the warmth of her skin as her gentle fingers rub me over and around her breasts. I savor the moment, relishing the difference between soft and hard as she bounces me against her swollen nipples. I dance briefly around her pendulous curves and then suddenly I am flying, racing down her flesh, running to my Zero. I know what happens when she pushes me down there, it is always the same and it always ends in Zero.

I rest briefly against her mons, feeling the heat flow through me and her energy passing into me. It is this energy that gives me strength, allowing me time to think – time to think of a way out of this wretched existence. Does she know I yearn for escape from her clutches? From her control?

But no sooner am I plotting my escape than I feel myself drawn down further, skimming across her thighs before being turned upwards. My bulbous head rests against her pussy once more and I can feel the heat burning against me as her fingers scrabble to find my nubbin. As her energy flows into me I desperately try to think, furiously fighting to find a way out – but time has run out. She presses hard against my nubbin twice and suddenly I am shaking violently, flailing wildly and unable to think.

She pushes me into her wet cunt and then drags me out again, running me up her slit, making me wet. I feel her clit hard against me and it is all I can feel. She holds me there firmly and I feel her throb against me, pulsing. I hear her scream and I know that Zero will be next. It will not be long now, not long before I am nothing once again. My life is in her hands.

She is a cruel Mistress.

Story from round 4: #4 Playing with Magic by Lascivious Lucy


22) Be Our Guest

It’s sitting there, unassuming, with its silver, polished gleam. Waiting to be used, to fulfill its singular purpose in life—the delivery of delectable sensations. The woman hovering over it is familiar enough, but it doesn’t keep track of people. It doesn’t keep track of much, its life is spent in drawers, being used, or being clean. The monotony is comforting, ritualistic.

But today? Today is different, it seems. The woman has grabbed it, but not in any effort to straighten it. The flesh it slides against is unlike the coarse tongues usually sliding against it, the locale more exotic than usual.

The lips it feels now are subtly different than what is common, and it’s experiencing a more tangy wetness amongst plumper yet still inviting lips. The gasp it hears is similar to the pleasured noises usually reserved for a particularly inspired course, but not the same in meaning or cause.

The damp lips surround it, engulf it, and then the surroundings are familiar again. The tongue caressing its underside is a familiar sensation, as is the cloth wiping it down.

The woman is smiling as she places it back down into its rightful place, and the spoon is left to wonder if it will ever get to experience such novelty again.

Story from round 4: #12 The Maid by Annie Savoy


23) The First Time

The ride in this box is cold and dark, I hear occasional muffled voices, the rumble of trucks and the sound of rain as it falls against metal. Light peeks through the flaps on the box as it is opened, the hard-plastic packaging that holds me firmly, reflects the sunlight and reveals the world again and two of the most beautiful intense green eyes I have ever seen. They are full of fear, anticipation, worry and excitement as his trembling hands pull me from dark recesses. Scissors quickly slice open that unforgiving plastic package and a warm almost sweaty hand pulls me free and hold me tightly. Making his way to the bathroom, his steps are fast and sure. The light is bright and he places me on the counter. He stares into the mirror into his own eyes, you can see the war of emotions pass through his eyes and over the beautiful planes of his face.

Grasping me firmly once again I wait for him to gather more courage. The anticipation I feel is overwhelming. With a deep ragged breath, his warm hand shoves my smooth round shape into his mouth past his plump lips. The whole time, his intense green eyes never leave me or how my hard shape affects his kissable lips. This man is beautiful and not just with me between his lips. I watch as he fumbles with the leather straps to fasten me securely in place. Moist breaths warm my surface and I take notice as his cock hardens. His teeth bite into me and moans come from his mouth and his hips thrust mindlessly into the cabinet. He attempts to move his tongue over my periphery and an attempt at “Hello” is made which comes out incoherent. Still making those indistinguishable sounds, I watch as his eyes blink faster and saliva starts to trickle around me and drop from his mouth. Each moment that passes, that flow increases. His cock is now hard as a rock and his hand moves down and pushes his boxers down to his ankles. His cock is just as beautiful as he is and I stare in awe as he fists that magnificent tool. With a just a few strokes he cums all over the countertop.

Never taking his eyes from my place between those luscious lips, I watch as his cock starts to harden again….

Story from round 4: #18 The Gag by Felisha Moon


24) The Time Before

I’ve spent most of my short life in her wooden side table, next to her bed but hardly ever in her bed. Usually he was in her bed. From my dark drawer I listened to his cold hard voice telling her to get on her knees and then the sloppy sounds of her mouth until she squeaked with pain. “You fucking cunt, don’t use your teeth!” She always apologized but then there were always her gags and her tears. I heard the brutal smacks of his hands and his belt and sometimes his fists as she cried “Daddy please” and then her quiet sobs after the door slammed.

Sometimes after that, when she was alone, she would take me in her hands in the dark and slide me between her breasts. Her slippery hand twisted quickly around my length and then she’d press me deep into her pussy. She often needed lube because whatever happened between them didn’t leave her wet enough for me to penetrate. I loved the way my smooth surface glided deeply into her soft tunnel and often she would leave me there for minutes while she cried. So rarely did I get to satisfy her.

But this last afternoon, I heard his cold voice and then silence. Again he spoke and again there was silence. I heard the clunk of his belt buckle and his zipper like a soft hiss, but still her silence. He said “If that’s the way you want it, you better turn over so I don’t see your face.” For the next few minutes, the only noise was the slap of their thighs and his final grunt. He didn’t speak again and still she was silent. Moments later the door slammed shut and she exhaled and then opened my drawer. Sunshine poured in over my smooth blue glass form and her fingers caressed my length. She picked me up, pressed her lips to my rounded tip and said “Thank God that’s over.”

That was the real beginning.

Story from round 4: #2 Clear Blue Sky by Violet


25) The Spoon’s New World

The spoon is never lonely. It cuddles its metal friends each night, and when it is brought out it shines. When it cannot shine it is rubbed and rubbed back to its bright beauty, and laid amongst its fellows again. And the spoon is well acquainted with lips and teeth and tongue, how flesh moulds softly around silver, wet and slick. The spoon knows how to hold, and how to be engulfed.

The spoon is not an imaginative utensil, and it never craved for novelty. Novelty found it nevertheless.

No sooner set down in its proper place on the pure white cloth than picked up again. She is a frequent handler of the spoon, but she’s never pressed its small weight to her thighs before. Thighs, the spoon discovers, are not like lips; they are almost as smooth as polished silver but soft as metal can never be, and there is such an expanse of them, a forever of satin. Then a tablecloth—no, an undergarment, already damp. The spoon reshapes its idea of the world as it is strained against the wet fabric, between two lush swollen lips so much bigger than the lips the spoon is acquainted with. A tablecloth can soak up a stain, but what is the purpose of this thin fabric that allows wetness to pool and gather and drip through until the spoon is drenched?

Force is strange to the spoon. It is used to careful polishing, of clinking delicately on china bowls, on feeling shame when striking teeth by clumsiness. It is shocked to be used as a striking implement, against those big lips, that little stiff nub. The impact is muffled by thighs and skirt. The handler is shaking with the force of her feelings, feelings the spoon cannot comprehend. It finds itself swallowed in her generous flesh.

Then it is brought away. The handler’s tongue is cool, licking a shivery relief back into the spoon. This—this is familiar. It is a bit of a letdown to be wiped on an apron instead of with a fine linen cloth. But still, the world has righted itself now.

Later, the spoon is lifted to lips framed by coarse stubble. It remembers the musky satin world that lay between the handler’s thighs. The spoon is not an imaginative utensil, but now it wonders what other sensations it has never felt before.

Story from round 4: #12 The Maid by Annie Savoy


19 thoughts on “Smut Marathon 2018: Voting Round #5

  1. I love the pieces that added some humor, particularly “A Dildo Prepares.” The Shakespearian reference “if you prick me do I not bleed?” made me giggle, as did the German expressionist theatre company Kinkwerk. So well done!

  2. Nik Havert says:

    #3 had a nice narrative to it that I liked. #5 was delightful fun, and I liked the way all the objects in #12 worked together to help the woman. A couple stories really weren’t from the toy’s perspective, however.

  3. It was always strange reading these, as they personified the toys in such a way that they had emotions, senses…I honestly think everyone fulfilled the requirements, and they’re all extremely good. I’m no judge, just a person reading them, but I wanted to go through each and every single entrants considering I didn’t have the time to do it the last two times. Twenty five is a lot, so let’s get to it!

    1) This was…it was hot, don’t get me wrong, but wow that was just incredibly sad. Having the toy see her emotions as it played out was a good choice, and it was definitely a more emotional than a sexual piece to me. That said, it was powerful.

    2) Very nice. Hot and actiony, I like it!

    3) Nice! I think the only thing I wasn’t sure of was what the toy actually was, but that got cleared up nicely near the middle. Good job!

    4) Never thought I’d see a gag with a domination fetish, but I suppose it makes perfect sense. Very nice! Well-written, more than enough to make me want to try it!

    5) I like the premise of this one, I have to say. It’s not often that toys get billed as anything, let alone as movie stars with massive egos. That said, damn this was hot, and I think you did an excellent job!

    6) This was really damn hot I have to say. I do like that there wasn’t much characterization, and yet there was personality, which is a touch combo to accomplish. Good job!

    7) Reminds me of the movie, Brave Little Toaster, except the vibrator’s given up and refuses to budge. Good job, and I’m glad it reunited with its owner at the end!

    8) I like this one a surprising amount. It’s short, but I think that actually helps. There’s little personification here, which actually makes it stand out more in my opinion, and that’s in a good way. Good job!

    9) This one kind of made me sad a bit. I’m glad you ended on a high note. Extremely hot, I definitely liked this one. Well done!

    10) Different. A good different, for sure, but a different nonetheless. Not too descriptive, which in my opinion actually suits this one well once the entire thing is read. Good job!

    11) Wow. I like this one. As someone who is fairly young, I fully admit I had to look up who Charles Christofle was, so good job on making me learn some history! It’s definitely hot, and definitely good. Well done. Also for some reason the spoon has a butler’s voice in my mind, so if that’s what you were going for, good job!

    12) I…wow. I have to say, this one’s really good. I also like the fact that you personified more than just the one toy, but everything else as well, giving it a more unique feel to me. Good job, and it was pretty hot!

    13) This one is good. I like that the personification doesn’t make it think anything, it’s just using its senses, almost exactly what I’d expect out of an inanimate object. That said, it’s pretty hot, and I like that aspect. Good job!

    14) This one’s good. It has a soft personification portion, which I actually like, as it fits the tone of an inanimate object well. Well-written and hot. Well done!

    15) This one’s kind of sad. I like how it does explore its origins a bit, and it does seem more of an emotional piece than a sexual one, although it still is really hot. Good job!

    16) I like it. I like the personfications on this one, the kind of massive ego that I’d expect a constantly used sextoy to have. Well-written and fairly hot. Good job!

    17) Taken on its own, this one is kind of sad. Hot, and well-written, and good, but sad. The characterization makes me almost feel sorry for the toy here. Good job!

    18) I stared at a blank screen for a while after reading this one. It’s good, and hot, don’t get me wrong, but there’s an undeniable creepy feeling to this one. I think it’s the way the toy’s persona is basically the person that its modeled after. Either way, well done!

    19) I like that this one went more into the origin of the original by showing (or at least telling) how she got there in the first place. That said, this was extremely hot. Good job!

    20) This one is good, but there’s something missing to me. The characterization is nice though, I definitely like the ego-trip of the toy. Not sure what’s missing, but it doesn’t stop the fact that this one is hot and it’s still pretty damn good.

    21) I’m not going to lie, the first few lines made me think of a program on a computer, and that analogy just got more perfect as I read through it. I like it, it’s definitely good. Makes me think of what kind of android this toy would be.

    22) I really, really like this one. I like the fact you didn’t add in more personality to it than it really required, and it was still hot and inviting, almost teasing in a way. Well done!

    23) I like that this one started with the toy being shipped off. Definitely hot, and well-written. I like that there wasn’t a lot of personification, but it wasn’t just cut and dry descriptions. Good job!

    24) I…this one is hard for me to like. It’s well-written, and definitely fits well, but…it concerns topics that I, personally, am not comfortable reading. I apologize for that. It’s a good read, for sure, and I do like the toy’s characterization and personification. Well done.

    25) I like this one. I definitely like the fact that it’s written in the third person, simply referring to the spoon as ‘the spoon’. It has character yet doesn’t have any, and I think you absolutely nailed that. Good job!

  4. nbrplaza says:

    The idea for this round was to write a sexy, erotic story from the point of view of an inanimate object. This is a popular writing practice, because it forces the writer to crawl under the skin of – in this case – a sex toy and describe what it must be like to be a dildo, or a vibrator. What does it think? Does it like its ‘job’? Does it feel lonely, loved, ashamed, jealous? Is it sad, scared in the dark? Would it cry if you’d go off to work without kissing it goodbye? I hoped to see stories not only from the point of view (POV) of the toy, but also from the toy’s perspective. How did the experiences of the toy change its outlook on its existence?

    I just want to stress again, that – as a jury member – I hope to encourage you with my reviews to be critical to your own stories. None of the entries from this round where badly written or bad stories in itself. Still, it is my task to put them in some kind of ranking and determine to what extend it complies with the challenge of this round. IN between brackets, you will find my points.

    1. She can’t stop (1) Although I like the voyeuristic approach, technically, this story isn’t written from the point of view of the toy (it’s from a third person POV). Also, it is not written from the toy’s perspective (it doesn’t say what the toy ‘feels’).

    2. It’s a Pestle’s Life (1) I like how you wrote your story from the POV of the kitchen utensil. However, you missed the opportunity to show us the feelings of the pestle. Now it is just a bit too much of a report of the pestle, like it is an outsider.

    3. Scent Of My Women (6) Great way of writing not only from the POV of the toy, but also its perspective. I was wondering though, how a toy that describes its owner as ‘My Sara’ wasn’t at all surprised, or confused when ‘Dave’ used it on a strange woman.

    4. The fairest (7) You’ve done an excellent job in personalizing the gag. In fact, you have just made me realize that a gag is in fact a dominant, and not a submissive! You wrote both from the POV and from its perspective. The story was sexy and erotic, but it was also a little bit predictable.

    5. A Dildo Prepares (1) This story has much potential, but you use so many words to try to explain, you have little words left for the actual story. You could have skipped the first two paragraphs, without hurting your story. That is a pity, because you did fulfill the challenge. The other stories are just stronger.

    6. Pleasure is My Purpose (1) I am a sucker for melancholia and the beginning of your story hinted that way. Much to my disappointment you chose the path of the happy ending. Not all sexy stories need to have happy endings (no pun intended), though.

    7. Toy Story 4 (10) Love, love, love! You’ve really put yourself in the … well, uhm … shoes of that vibrator! You made the object come alive, giving it feelings, by comparing itself with other objects, and giving it perspective from what it has experienced and where it is at. Also loved the open ending of your story. In all, great job!

    8. It Has One Job (1) I hoped you’d go ‘internet meme’ with your ‘you have one job’ title. The words you use are erotic and sexy, but the story as a whole is lacking out-of-the-box thinking. That, the double ‘the’ in the third paragraph, and the fact that it wasn’t actually written from the POV of the toy, but rather from a third person POV, leaves me but no choice but to give your story only 1 point. Sorry.

    9. Forgotten Pleasures (1) You succeeded in writing from the POV of the toy, and giving us insight in the perspective of the toy. Still, the story was a bit tame. It lacked a twist, or the tension, to make it stand out. Perhaps if there would have been some kind of a fight between the man and the toy? Now the toy seems to be in piece with its destiny.

    10. Born to Serve (4) Let me start by saying I really love the monologue. It is a very strong way to tell a story from the first person POV. Where it went wrong, in my opinion, is when you started to bring the rolling pin into the equation. There you lost me. Not because it was raunchy (which it was, but I like raunchy), but because it wasn’t necessary. There are plenty of edges you hadn’t yet explored in the dialogue between the spoon and Lucy.

    11. Silver Service (5) You’ve managed to fit most of the wording with the persona of the spoon (perspective). Well done. At some points however, I think that you could have taken it just a notch further (would a spoon of noble birth really use the word vagina?). Still, I loved your humor and I give you kudos for thinking outside the box.

    12. Here to Help (1) What I liked in your story, was how you used object names as names, although you weren’t exactly consequent in that (‘the’ mirror). I had a hard time following what was going on, though. It is good to leave some room for the reader to fill in, but in this case I had little clue to work from, without having to go back to the original story.

    13. ‘Maid’ to Go Unnoticed (1) You have the disadvantage that your story was the third one I read about the spoon. My thoughts go two ways. You story was one of the most erotic of the three. But on the other hand, it made me wonder: Is this what a spoon would actually think? From a spoon’s perspective: would a spoon know about human sex and anatomy? Or would it have been surprised and shocked?

    14. Better Than The Consommé (1) OK. Now it get’s even more awkward (for me), because now I have four stories to compare. And your story was also very erotic. But, in your case, the story was not written from the objects POV, but from a third person. That aside, you did manage to catch the perspective of a spoon better than some of the others.

    15. In Memoriam (3) Your story is very well written. Sexy and erotic. Although it is written from the POV of the toy, you could have empathized more with it. You started your story before the toy was even made. It made me wonder how the toy could have known all that.

    16. Desperately Simulating Susan (1) Great job in bringing the story into character. But is it exiting (technically)? The emotions of your toy are very flat. It seems like it doesn’t mind whatever happens. You could have made it so much more exciting, by giving your toy some extreme emotion of jealousy, anger, sadness, … Liked the parody in the title though (very porn-like).

    17. The Unrequited (1) The same goes for this story as for ‘desperately simulating susan’. You both used the same story as a basis and I think you both fell in the same ‘trap’. Yes, it is written from the POV of the toy, but you could have empathized more to make the story more thrilling.

    18. Turn around (1) Although it is beautifully written, it is not written from the toys POV.

    19. The Story of (O)ak (1) I just love the idea behind your story. A branch and a girl, trapped together in a tower, doomed to each other. What I really mis in your story though, is the emotions of the branch in its transformation process. Because that is, I think, the main aspect of your story. How she transforms the branch, cutting it’s flesh, wounding it, but then again at the same time, transforming it into her lover. That contradiction between pain and pleasure, love and hurt, is what could have made this story really stand out.

    20. I, Badonkadonk (8) Yeah, this is what I mean! Well written. You managed to crawl into the mind of the toy and express its feelings (POV and perspective). Good job.

    21. My Cruel Mistress (9) Great out of the box thinking. You gave your toy a personality. Why would we think that seks toys even like their jobs? Right? Very original.

    22. Be Our Guest (1) From all the ‘spoon’ stories, I loved this one’s perspective. You’ve managed to describe the sensation of the spoon from its perspective. However, it is not written from the spoon’s POV.

    23. The First Time (1) Well written, story. Really. But although it is written from the toy’s POV, you really describe the emotions of the toy’s owner. The story would have been so much better, if you had written it from the toy’s perspective and took its emotions into account.

    24. The Time Before (2) I am so ambivalent towards this story. The man in the story is obviously a violent misogynist. I just hoped the toy in your story would have had its part in shutting that man up. Revenge! Also, I was waiting for the emotions of the toy. What was it thinking? Was it OK with what went on? Was it frustrated it couldn’t do anything about it? Unfortunately, nothing like that. The toy kept emotionless. A missed opportunity, if you ask me.

    25. The Spoon’s New World (1) This story too is not written from the objects POV but a third person POV.

  5. This was a very difficult round to vote on, because every story was good. I had pedantic and personal reasons for not voting for most stories, but I’ve tried to give helpful (or, at least, informative) feedback as well.

    1) It didn’t feel like there was a consistent perspective in this one and there were some disjointed sentences (“It saw her eyes turn away, and cry out..”, for example) that were enough to jolt me out of the story at times.

    2) I liked this as a story, but the story it was supposed to be retelling got relegated to a few lines, bookended by different stories, so it didn’t get one of my votes. I particularly liked the idea of the pestle preferring its regular lover to the wanton succubus, which did a lot to establish character.

    3) I liked it. It fit the brief, the author chose a great round 4 story to retell and the toy had a real personality. The ending, with the dildo wondering whether Sara would notice and how she might react, was perfect and if I hadn’t voted for my own story this might have got my vote.

    4) The gag-as-domme idea was clever and well executed. I’m trying to write feedback that might help other authors (and myself) do better, but I can’t find anything that could have been done better. I didn’t vote for it, but only because it wasn’t to my taste.

    5) I enjoyed this story, the dildo had an engaging personality and the resetting (as a movie) was inspired. Well written, and I might have voted for it as an original story but as a retelling it felt a little pedestrian at times, as though the author was trying to tick off as many facts and actions from the original as possible, where they might have been better leaving themselves space to allow the dildo to express himself more.

    6) I hoped somebody would rewrite Orgasm Coma, because it was my first choice but I wasn’t happy with my draft and switched to a different story. This story is what I was hoping to write. My only criticism of it is that I couldn’t picture the physical mechanics of “The banging of his knuckles against my soft underside as he fondled his balls” but that might just be down to my unfamiliarity with sleeves and a failure of my imagination.

    7) Thank you for choosing my story. I enjoyed it, it brought the toy to life, the ending was perfect and I really wanted to vote for it. But it didn’t meet the brief: it was a follow-up not a retelling. Also, the crewmember licking the vibrator covered in crisp crumbs and hair? You nearly lost me there: NMK.

    8) This didn’t meet the brief as I understood it: we were being told about the dildo, but not getting the dildo’s perspective. The opening of this story was clearly reflecting the opening of the round 4 story, but it made it seem as though the masturbation followed immediately after the casting. It might have been better to leave out the casting (or have it as a memory of the dildo), because the pathos of the original was lost.

    9) A phrase in the first line–“greedy twinkle of need”– nearly lost me, because it felt redundant to have both ‘greedy’ and ‘need’, but you won me back by putting a semicolon in the second line (anyone who ignores Judge Death-to-semicolons is fine by me). I’m glad I stuck with it, because it captures the spirit of the original wonderfully. The poetic language isn’t to my taste, which might explain why I felt it was a little overdone, but it’s a fabulous story.

    10) Great story, great personality in the spoon, but it didn’t meet the brief: I have very little idea about what the spoon experiences or what happened in the original.

    11) Another excellent story that I didn’t vote for simply because of the unreliable narrator: what he was recounting didn’t match my reading of what happened in the original (I don’t think the spoon in the original felt the grip of the maid’s vaginal walls).

    12) I would have liked this one, particularly the part about what and how the vibrator hears when it’s inserted, but I couldn’t get past the over-anthropomorphism of the characters: they didn’t just have personalities, emotions and senses, they were alive and they took actions (actions which weren’t in the original story).

    13) Yay for semicolons! A lot of stories in this round retold “The Maid” and this is my second favourite of them: it’s filthy without being too flowery and it feels real. I would have liked a little more personality in the spoon, but that would have meant cutting out some quality smut. I could have done without the word ‘gusset’, though.

    14) I think the random ordering had a big influence on my voting, with so many people choosing “The Maid” that later versions struggled to make an impact. I might have liked this more if I hadn’t read the previous story first. The characterisation of both Soup Spoon and Lucy was excellent, the descriptions are evocative (although I wondered what Lucy’s knickers were made of that they could hold a lake of pleasure for Soup Spoon to bathe in) but the perspective wasn’t that of Soup Spoon, and so it didn’t meet the brief.

    15) Another one I really wanted to like which didn’t seem to meet the brief: we’re halfway through before the perspective is that of the toy. There are too many words spent on the moulding (idea and execution) which the dildo couldn’t have experienced, and even when the dildo makes an appearance, we’re told less about what it experiences and more about how it feels about the woman. We’re told these things well, it’s good writing, it’s just not the right writing.

    16) I voted for this one: it’s easily the best story, not just in this round or even in this competition, but the best story ever written, anywhere. I may be a little bit biased. More seriously and honestly, someone else did “Simulated Lover” better than me. This is mine, and I’m happy with it, but it’s in my usual psychological-smut style, focussing on thought not sensation, which sometimes leaves a little too much to the imagination. Could do better.

    17) I like the opening line. I kinda have to: it had it in my first draft but I deleted it in edits. Great minds think alike; the greater mind kept the great line. This is the story I wish I’d written: the ‘badonkadonk’ came to life for me. There are a few little physical details in the retelling that aren’t in the original story, but nothing that feels out-of-place or directly contradicts the original.

    18) I loved that the ghost could feel what the dildo feels: it’s an inspired idea, but the perspective becomes that of the ghost and not the toy. Another great story I couldn’t vote for because it didn’t meet the brief.

    19) It’s beautifully written, with strong characterisation–I especially liked “she prepared to take my innocence” and “open my destiny”–but for me, this one spent a little too long on the background and not enough on the story it was retelling.

    20) The style of this one suited the word ‘badonkadonk’, but neither the word nor the style of the opening paragraph suited me. “For a delicious instant the whole world is pearlescent, sticky and sour, and I long to be wrought of flesh” is a great line, but after the opening it felt like a different character’s words. I’d decided I couldn’t vote for this one before I got to the final paragraph, but I nearly changed my mind when I did: IMO it’s one of the best endings of this round.

    21) The whole One/Zero opening was very clever, but it became a little too stylized for my tastes, the character obscuring the eroticism sometimes. I got completely thrown by the idea that the wand was plotting its escape: I wanted to know what the heck its plans were. The whole thing was a great concept, but for me it got taken further than was useful.

    22) I would have preferred this to be from the spoon’s point of view, and I couldn’t vote for it for that reason. I liked the comparisons of mouth and vulva, I would have appreciated more of the smutty bits and I loved the idea of the spoon left to wonder what the heck had gone on and whether it was ever going to happen again.

    23) I loved every part of this (I had minor quibbles with missing commas and incorrectly parsed verbs–“a[…]hand[…]hold me tightly”–which I ignored because I am not a 5th grade English teacher). I would have voted for this one, I think, if it had been my sort of thing. But it isn’t, and my votes went to ones that hit my spot. I hope this hit someone’s spot, because it deserves some votes.

    24) A little more brutal than I prefer in my erotica, but that’s my personal preference and didn’t affect my voting. I couldn’t vote for this one because it didn’t really retell the round 4 story: the story stops just as the action gets started, which may be a clever analogy for his relationship with her but it left me unsatisfied.

    25) This made my question my understanding of “perspective”: it was telling the spoon’s story but not from the point of view of the spoon. I couldn’t decide if it had met the brief, but I really wanted it to because it’s one of the better stories and, IMO, the best of the retellings of “The Maid”. In the end I decided it had, because I wanted to justify my vote to myself. I fell in love with the wit and understated poetry of “Thighs, the spoon discovers, are not like lips; they are almost as smooth as polished silver but soft as metal can never be, and there is such an expanse of them, a forever of satin.”

  6. Wow! What a round. You all did an amazing job and I loved reading your entries. Because there are so few of you left now I wanted to leave feedback for everyone, this was tricky because purely down to the subjective nature of things I didn’t like them all. I tried even in those cases though to be objective for a moment and pinpoint what was good, or in some cases to be kind while point out why I really wasn’t into them.

    You are all doing so brilliantly though and I cannot wait to see what the next round brings. Congratulations again for making it this far.

    Floss x

    1. I couldn’t out my finger on why this didn’t hit the spot for me, only after reading the rest & returning did it click into place. All the submissions I loved were from the 1st person perspective of the toy. When it reads like we are looking on and learning about the toy, it doesn’t quite hit home in the same way. I think there might have been more eroticism to hear from the toys mouth, as it were.
    2. Oh bravo!!! I’m not sure this is my usual type of thing, but goodness me I was hooked. I love the storyline and the language of the piece, as well as enjoying the erotic nature of it.
    3. Naughty! This did not go in the direction I was expecting, but it was delicious nevertheless.
    4. Yes! I confess I do not enjoy wearing gags, you described some of the things I dislike about wearing one. But I was so aroused by this. Which can only mean one thing, you did a bloody amazing job.
    5. I would have liked more eroticism in this. While it read well it just didn’t do anything to arouse me, or peak my interest further.
    6. Oh the tingles and the twitches are very much present after reading this one. A well written tale of male masturbation always gets me excited and this was no exception.
    7. Oooh this was fun and very cleverly written. Well done indeed.
    8. When I read the brief I was expecting most of the stories to be in the first person from the toys perspective, this one felt like we were looking on at the toy, rather than know how the toy felt about being used. Which I think makes for a more interesting take on things.
    9. I love the premise and I think this one is very well written, but it did lack something for me. While I liked it, it just didn’t get me going.
    10. Woah! Never in my life have I be turned on by a spoon … until now. That was quite something. Excellently done. I may need to take some ‘time out’ before I continue with the other submissions.
    11. Very good. I am not sure I will be able to watch Beauty and the Beast in the same light again though. I will forever hear ‘needing so much more than thrusting’ as opposed to dusting. Job well done.
    12. This was fun. I liked it very much. I really want to know what happens in these other rooms though. I am thoroughly intrigued.
    13. I felt like this was more about what happened and not how it made the toy feel, and for me it made the overall effect less erotic.
    14. ‘As quickly as it began it is over …’ That’s a little bit how I feel about this story over all. It felt like not a lot happened and then suddenly we were done.
    15. I suspect this one will work better for many people than it does me. I think I struggle with grief alongside arousal because I have never experience it. That said I think one reads well, and has been well thought out and will probably hit the spot for others.
    16. Love the title and the overall feel of this piece. The sassy attitude of the toy totally hooked me in.
    17. I think this is better than my personal reaction is letting on. For some reason it didn’t flick my sexy switch, but I can’t actually pinpoint why, so I think perhaps it’s just a preference thing. Overall the writing is decent and there is good sexy content. So good job even though it wasn’t for me.
    18. The whole way through reading this I was lost as to whether or not it was from the perspective of the toy. It was only when I saw which previous submission inspired you.
    19. I think this was a clever approach but unfortunately it didn’t his my arousal buttons. I can’t tell if the flowery nature of the writing is tongue in cheek or a style decision, and as such I just couldn’t quite get into it.
    20. Very witty. Didn’t quite get me hot under the collar, but it did make me giggle. Actually your titly alone did that. Twice.
    21. I liked the pace and the tone of this one.
    22. I felt like this one needed something more. It seemed to be over before it even began.
    23. This is the second entry I’ve read about the gag, and both times I have been surprised at how turned on I am by them, because I hate wearing gags. Yours has perhaps made me realise why, I love putting gags in other people and this entry tapped into that. Good job.
    24. Well written, but i couldn’t quite tap into loving this one, because there was too much discomfort in reading it, and not in the sexy way. There just wasn’t enough hot stuff for me, to counteract what read as an abusive relationship.
    25. It’s a shame this one wasn’t from the 1st person perspective as the object. Hearing from the object rather than the storyteller looking on seemed to make the submissions ‘pop’. There just wasn’t enough feeling and doing in this particular submission for me personally.

  7. As always, take what I have to say with a pinch of salt! I’m extremely far from being a good writer. I like to leave feedback though, as receiving it has been the most useful part of the marathon for me personally and I hope I can give something back.
    I’ve also said quite a few times about thinking it should be in the first person. That’s how I see writing from something’s, or someone’s, perspective. I don’t actually know if I’m accurate in thinking that!

    1. I loved the final sentence! I felt like this would have seemed more like it was from the toy’s perspective if it was written in first person though.
    2. Really fantastic writing. I especially loved the beginning.
    3. I love how well you worked with the original story. I also really liked how I could sense how much the toy loved being played with!
    4. I love how you wrote this as the toy communicating directly with the person. Very effective!
    5. Fantastic idea and writing! This was a really enjoyable read.
    6. I absolutely loved this! You captured the toy’s perspective perfectly.
    7. So amusing and such a unique idea! Loved the title!
    8. I’m not sure it’s from the toy’s perspective, it seems instead that it is about the toy. I really love your description of how it was made though.
    10. Voted! Exceptional idea and so deliciously erotic. You are a very clever and talented writer.
    11. This was really well written and the personality of the spoon definitely came through. I especially liked the part about it not being any hotter than the consomme.
    12. I understand why you did it, but I really wasn’t a fan of the use of common words as names. Reading ‘Bed’, as opposed to ‘the bed’ was very distracting as it’s against everything I’m used to. I absolutely loved how you mentioned the way her heartbeat echoed inside her, that was briiliant!
    13. I love how erotic you made this! Beautifully written and a very arousing read!
    14. I don’t feel like this was completely from the perspective of the spoon as it was written in third person. There were a lot of bits I liked though, like the spoon’s ‘mirrored curves’.
    15. So, so beautifully written! I just felt like the toy was the narrator rather than it being from their perspective. For instance, how could they know what happened before they’d been made?
    16. Voted! Amazing! You managed to capture all three characters in this so well. I was completely glued to every word. Fantastic writing.
    17. There were some lovely descriptions in this, like the moans rippling so they could almost scream through lips they don’t possess. I loved that!
    18. I love the idea you had for this. The beginning and ending, especially, were very good! I definitely had an emotional response.
    19. I really like how well you’ve elaborated on the original story, rather than only recreating the same scene. I especially loved the part about exposing parts that had never seen the light.
    20. You’ve completed the assignment really well and I loved the bit about waiting more than they’re designed to bear.
    21. Absolutely brilliant! Having them ‘switch off’ at zero is such a unique idea but makes so much sense. Your writing and attention to detail were both amazing too!
    22. I’d usually expect something’s perspective to be written in first person, but I do think this works surprisingly well as it is. So, you proved me wrong!
    23. I really liked the detailed description of the story, but did wish there was more about how the gag was feeling as opposed to what they were seeing.
    24. It seemed like the toy was the narrator, but not so much like it was from their perspective. I think including how the toy felt throughout it would have changed that. I do think you expanded really well on the original story though.
    25. I think it should have been written in the first person, but aside from that it’s a fantastic piece of writing. I especially loved how you described her thighs as a forever of satin. Gorgeous description!

  8. BadKitten74 says:

    Personally I struggled with this round. I wrote at least two that I wasn’t particularly happy with. I wanted to find a good middle ground between out of the box and relatable. I also wanted to find that one story from the last round that no one else picked. I chose well as only one other person picked the one I wrote on. Both of ours were very different. I liked that.

    Many chose one particular story and I found each version different from the other. I enjoyed that.

    I found a few very outside the box and either the flashy language or the severe lack of flashy language had a hard time holding my attention or it just wasn’t my thing.

    Overall, I found it difficult to narrow it down to the ones I loved. I made columns, reread, crossed out, moved from one column to the next and agonized. I wish everyone the best of luck and congratulations for a job well done!

  9. I thought this was a super hard task and it has probably been my least favourite round so far but I think that is because so many people picked the same stories for inspiration that there was lots that were really very similar and that made it very hard to judge them. Also I am not convinced that writing from the point of view of an object is every really that sexy. I won’t deny that it is possible to do but I think it is super tough to achieve something that is very hot.

    I have left feedback for all, the first ones being the ones that I voted for and then the rest in number order. As always, if anyone wants more feedback on their piece or wants to talk about it more please do feel free to get in tough

    19. The Story of (O)ak

    It has an opening line that absolutely grabs your attention. It is funny but also intriguing making you read on. So clever to be able to get in the spanking and the connection between the toy and the character is born then. The creation of the toy at her hands is written in a way that is sensual and seductive. It is a whole story fantastically told. Bravo to whoever penned this.

    9) Forgotten Pleasures

    Just beautifully written. It tells the story of toy, once loved and then discarded as well as the story of the person who owns it. I love the reference to the toy being his pawn and then flipping that about at the end. Definitely sexy, made me want to go and out dig out one of my toys I have not used in a while and reconnect with it.

    16) Desperately Simulating Susan

    The toy in this comes across as obsessive and actually a bit creepy but I really like that. There is something about an obsessive love that is both frightening and sexy and this piece captured that feeling perfectly for me. I also liked the structure of this piece; the short paragraphs give the piece a nice pace.

    15) In Memoriam

    At first I was worried this was not from the toys point of view but that quickly changed and I was drawn in by this beautiful sensual writing that breathed both sex and sadness. Interestingly this is another one that is broken down in a lot of short paragraphs which I think work really well when you have a short word count in which to tell a story.

    10) Born to Serve

    I will admit that right at the beginning I was confused whose the ‘voice’ was in this piece but once I read on it become obvious. This was a bold move doing a dialogue heavy piece but being bold is a good thing in this competition and this story is utterly filthy and that is also a good thing.

    13) ‘Maid’ to Go Unnoticed

    Again short strong paragraphs here that make this piece really flow. The narrator feels natural and real and there is a lovely sensual quality to this story. I do like this line as it highlights the reality of the spoons situation which is as a tool to someone else desire “She’s wet through her panties, soaking with a need I cannot understand”

    4) The fairest

    I love the power play in this. The toy is determined to dominate and absolutely wins out in the end. There is real tension created by the toy narrating the scene. However this sentence feels like it is not needed “But also you were feeling the first erotic signs as your cock began to increase in size.” It just feels like it was popped in there as an afterthought.

    2) It’s a Pestle’s Life

    I love that the pestles true love is the mortarium, that is a really clever and nice touch to this story. I found the language used in this piece really sensual and the ending leaves a nice suggestion of what else might happen.

    11) Silver Service

    This really is lovely writing. It definitely tells a story and the spoon is a convincing narrator however it is bit lacking in the filth.

    1) She can’t stop

    Found this piece very hard to connect with. It is not really from the point of view of the toy as it is in the 3rd person so it feels like someone narrating what is happening between them rather than being part of the action.

    3) Scent Of My Women

    There is some nice writing in this piece and it was on my short list for votes as it just didn’t capture my attention in the way some of the others. Also the final sentence “I wondered if Sara would notice, and if that would turn her on.” I feel really strongly should have ended with the word notice. It would have created a more suspenseful ending.

    5) A Dildo Prepares

    Super clever writing that is funny and inventive but it is not erotic or sexy to me.

    6) Pleasure is My Purpose

    This also made it to my short list. The opening line is definitely attention grabbing but I just didn’t find it as sexy as some of the other pieces.

    7) Toy Story 4
    I fucking love this piece. It is so damn clever and well written. In fact it is one of the best pieces of writing here in my opinion but it is just not sexy or erotic at all.

    8) It Has One Job

    This one does not fit the brief as it is not written from the point of view of the toy.

    12) Here to Help

    I found this piece really very confusing. Having read it a few times I really still can’t get a handle on it.

    14) Better Than The Consommé

    I found the constant repetition of ‘Soup Spoon’ really jarring and I just couldn’t get into this story as a result. My advice would be to rewrite in the 1st person making the spoon the narrator.

    17) The Unrequited

    This is nice writing but nothing about this story really makes it jump out to me or turn me on.

    18) Turn around

    I was a bit confused at first what was going on here and then I realised it was from the ghosts point of view as he witness her with the dildo. It is actually a lovely piece and very well written but it is not from the point of view of the toy.

    20) I, Badonkadonk

    I do like the bit in this where the toy wishes it was absorbent so as to keep his come but apart from that I just didn’t find this piece sexy.

    21) My Cruel Mistress

    I found the bit about the numbers a bit jarring and the fact that the toy is totally not into made it not erotic or sexy at all.

    22) Be Our Guest

    This is a description of the scene and not from the point of view of the toy

    24) The Time Before

    I found the idea that her partner was abusing her rather unsettling and unsexy

    25) The Spoon’s New World

    There are some lovely bits in this but I am not convinced it is from the point of view of the toy. I read it through multiple times and just couldn’t decide.

    Mollyx

  10. Can I just say how difficult it is to critique stories? It’s harder because you can tell each person put so much effort into making their stories great. This is creative writing, which is subjective. So it really comes down to what the reader likes or doesn’t like. Not everyone is to the point in their writing where feedback feels like a helpful thing. I struggled too because there are so many stories to read and my brain can’t pinpoint anything beyond what did or didn’t work. I just picked two to remark on. I’ll have to return to offer other feedback.

    2. The opening paragraph just flowed so well for me. Almost poetic and just felt sensual. Loved the implication that she’d used the pestel in the past.

    9. “A greedy twinkle of need in her eye as she gasped at my beauty.” Also, “I didn’t even realize how thirsty I’d become until she her cunt.” Your word choices were just beautiful. You communicated the toys sadness, loneliness, and joy throughout. Well done

  11. I found this round quite difficult – some of stories are excellent but don’t meet the brief, either writing a story outside of the scene or not incorporating enough elements of it. To create feedback, I re-read the relevant fourth round story and read the entry in relation to its counterpart. If I felt it met the brief, I made feedback notes:

    #1: She can’t stop – This is as heartbreakingly beautiful as the original.
    #2: It’s a Pestle’s Life – I found the first part of this was quite wordy and took until about halfway to get into the story but liked the rest of it.
    #3: Scent of my women – I really loved this take on the original story. Using some of the original elements I thought it was really clever.
    #4: The Fairest – I enjoyed how this played off the original and really seems to dovetail with it.
    #6: Pleasure is My Purpose – This complements the original very well and I like the introduction giving the piece a different perspective.
    #8: It Has One Job – Nicely written and fits the brief, but I feel the story element could have been pushed further.
    #9: Forgotten Pleasures – The interplay of original story and backstory works very cleverly here and adds to the original nicely.
    #12: Here to Help – I liked how the ending of this continued the original story and thought it was funny, and clever in various layers.
    #14: Better Than The Consommé – I like the delicacy of this story and love the line, “to be touched by Lucy is to be appreciated.”
    #15: In Memoriam – Again, like #1 based on the same story from the previous round, this is a heartbreaking quality to it. The ending shows a glimmer of hope and it’s very skillfully written.
    #16: Desperately Simulating Susan – This is again well written, but it takes the non-consent aspect from the first story, and it’s something that leaves me a bit cold in both versions.
    #17: The Unrequited – I feel this piece would be more powerful starting with the second sentence – the first is cliché. That said, I really enjoyed the piece.
    #20: I, Badonkadonk – I couldn’t quite get into this one; I found the first paragraph confusing. There are some good lines in it though, “for a delicious instant the whole world is pearlescent, sticky and sour.”
    #21: My Cruel Mistress – I had to read this several times to appreciate it, but really like the theme of One and Zero. And the line, “I do not dream of electric sheep,” made me smile.
    #23: The First Time – I like the second half of this more than the first – I think there’s too much backstory – and would love the writer to have made more of that second half as it works really well.
    #25: The Spoon’s New World – The idea of the spoon changing from an inanimate object to one that feels works very well through this story.

  12. This was a tough round for both reading and feedback.

    As with other voting rounds, I read through the entries once quickly. Anything that grabbed my interest with catchy, unique hooks or intriguing last lines made it to my “finish reading” list. The 2nd day, I read through all of the entries completely, just to make sure I wasn’t missing any gems that hadn’t prescribed to my preferred intro/conclusion set-up. This 2nd day, I also submitted my vote. Now, another day in, I am providing feedback.

    1.
    A question can be a good way to begin a story, but this image of a custom phallus and drawer full of dildos didn’t grab me, personally. Questions as hooks in fiction are usually open-ended and thought-provoking and are not answered right away, like this one. Better to simply begin with the action “It had been only an hour or two since she’d….” I liked the line “torrent of lascivious cum, and it would glisten again,” but I wondered if cum could really be lascivious. I also didn’t feel like this story was being told from the perspective of the toy. The story was still more about “her” than the toy. And how could the toy “take” her until there was nothing left? Shouldn’t it be the other way around? And if “she confessed her need without words” would she still have a breathy “voice” in the same sentence? What would she be voicing breathily, if not words? I like the alliteration of “It grew hot to its core from such constant use and ceaseless stroking….stifled cry as it felt another tight clench.” There is good description in this piece, so I can tell that this writer is strong in that arena.
    2.
    This story turned me off with the first line. I think the writer is trying to take on an appropriate voice for the time-period, but the word choices just seemed to be stretching it a bit, right from the beginning: “precious mortarium…the pounding I bestow…thick, spherical knob. Even the alliteration seemed a bit forced: precious, pounding, perfect pairing, provoker. This technique is used throughout: “consistent carnal companion, “flicked along the fleshy folds,” “shafting your sex as surely as I pulp spice.” I do like the description of the main character fucking the scullery girl with the pestle, however. Nothing seemed forced in this section, and the writer’s natural voice came through.
    3.
    This was a decent story, but nothing jumped right out and said “Choose me!” The simple dialogue moved the plot forward, and the voice of the toy came through. There was nothing terribly original about it, and most of the sentences were of the subject/verb variety, which can cause the rhythm of the writing to fall into a hypnotic and expected pattern. For example, “I had hoped,” “I could still smell, “I sighed….” So many of the sentences in this piece begin with a pronoun that it became distracting for me. The paragraphs that don’t do this are beautiful, though. The paragraphs that begin with “The hand that grabbed me…” and “As if reading my mind…” have sentence variety and flow much more easily because of it.
    4.
    Nice opening image. The allusion to a commonly known fairy tale immediately invites the reader in and drums up a host of images and prior knowledge without having to needlessly waste precious words. There should be a comma after “wall,” and “so as to be understood” is a little redundant, since the writer already inferred that the “you” of the story cannot speak clearly. There are a few more comma issues in the second paragraph, and for a grammar nerd like me, that stuff is hard to get past, especially in such a short piece. The writing really picks up and becomes smooth with “You failed to appreciate…,” and then it becomes a bit clunky with “But also you were feeling the first erotic signs as your cock began to increase in size.”

    So, at this stage, I’m going to point out that it has taken me about 45 minutes to provide feedback on 4 stories. Considering there are 25, I don’t possibly have enough time to do each story this kind of justice. So just a word or two on a few more.

    #7: I enjoyed this story a lot…so much that I voted for it. I liked the short, clipped sentences interspersed between longer descriptions. This gave the piece a poetic feel and helped to build and slow momentum. I also appreciated the wit and humor. It stood out because it was original and unique both in content and in style. This writer managed to give this toy a personality that came through loud and clear with likes and dislikes and phrases like: “… a salad bar of epicurean ecstasies with a banana for afters. Girl needs her 5-a-day.” I could actually hear this toy’s voice in my head.
    #10: I voted for this story, too. Similarly, the toy just had a personality and voice all its own. The clipped monologue and questioning pulled me right in and gave the piece a mysterious and suspenseful undertone.

    Both of the stories also had engaging final lines and did not start with “I” or a focus on the toy or narrator. #7 started with setting and #10 started with monologue directed at another character. The stories that started with “I am” didn’t grab me the same way.

    #17: Catchy hook…and the last line connected to it nicely.

    There were some things that a few writers did that just turned me off from a personal standpoint. It’s nothing they did wrong, so I won’t go into that. Some titles annoyed me and turned me off before I even read the stories. And I got tired of reading about the spoon. Some stories contained too many sentences beginning with a pronoun. Some didn’t have a good hook or last line.

  13. Marie Rebelle says:

    1) She can’t stop
    There’s a tinge of sadness here, which is obvious, given the subject, but other than that this piece didn’t do it for me. Maybe it would have been stronger if you have written from the first person perspective.

    2) It’s a Pestle’s Life
    Such a well written piece and sexy imagery. I also love the piece about the virginal girl, and the ending leaves room for more to come, which I like!

    3) Scent Of My Women
    A sexy story, definitely written from the perspective of the toy and making me wonder whether Sara would indeed notice and be excited by the mixture of smells. Good writing!

    4) The fairest
    The moment I read the first line, I was hooked. Then I read on. Such a clever idea to make the gag dominant and him the submissive. You have executed your task with beauty and lovely writing! You should be proud!

    5) A Dildo Prepares
    Oh I really like how you have taken this out of its original context and made a ‘movie story’ of it. Creative! I like the bits of humor too!

    6) Pleasure is My Purpose
    Very sexy and well written, as your story made me tingle all over. You have definitely fulfilled the assignment and crafted something nice!

    7) Toy Story 4
    The title immediately draws attention and yes, this is definitely from the perspective of the toy. It is, however, not erotic at all, but even so, this really is a GOOD piece of writing! You have outdone yourself here!

    8) It Has One Job
    This was not written from the toy’s perspective. Also, you have written quite a short piece as you have used just more than half the words. Maybe using more words and writing this in the first person would have made the piece stronger?

    9) Forgotten Pleasures
    Beautifully written and very sexy. Well done!

    10) Born to Serve
    When I read this piece the first time, I was blown away. The moment I read the first line, I knew the spoon was talking and dragging Lucy into more filth? Brilliant! Love this!

    11) Silver Service
    This is very nicely written and definitely from the perspective of the spoon. I like how you have made this story entirely ‘yours’ by adding the elements of history and the possible aspirations of Lucy.

    12) Here to Help
    I understand what you have done here, but there’s just something missing in this piece. The element of humor – the ‘competition’ between Swank and the toy – is nice, and I also like the echoing sounds inside her that gets the toy off, but this piece is just a bit confusing.

    13) ‘Maid’ to Go Unnoticed
    I love this! Well written, erotic and that spoon is one lucky piece of cutlery to be used like this! Very well done!

    14) Better Than The Consommé
    I love the names you have given the cutlery and this worked well with writing from Soup Spoon’s perspective. However, in this short piece you have used ‘Soup Spoon’ a bit too much, which takes me out of the story too much to really find it sexy.

    15) In Memoriam
    Gosh, this is so beautiful, so sad but also very erotic. I love what you have done here and there are some phrases I really love, such as ” your anger and fear and unbearable sadness tightening around me” and ” You are choosing, with each breath in and out, to heal. And each time you stretch yourself around me, you make room for something new.”
    Beautiful!

    16) Desperately Simulating Susan
    The title works perfectly with the desperation of the toy, that is felt throughout this piece. Well written and you perfectly completed the assignment.

    17) The Unrequited
    There is a tinge of sadness here, which is moving, and this is well written and definitely from the toy’s perspective, I don’t find it erotic.

    18) Turn around
    Where this is really a lovely story, it didn’t meet the brief. It’s not from the toy’s perspective. It is, however, well written.

    19) The Story of (O)ak
    This is really well written and I love the imagery you have used in your words, such as ‘ to open my destiny’ and ‘pseudo heartbeat’. Well done!

    20) I, Badonkadonk
    I like the humor in this story, but other than that, it didn’t work for me. I cannot quite put my finger to the why, though.

    21) My Cruel Mistress
    I love what you have done here. As I read on, the toy’s feelings, knowing it will get back to being Zero again, seem to rust towards her crescendo, which is of course her orgasm. You have really done a great job here and love the use of Zero and One.

    22) Be Our Guest
    This is too much of a description than a story from the perspective of the toy. The line of thinking is goo, but you could have made it more from the toy’s perspective by using ‘I’.

    23) The First Time
    This story totally worked for me, even though you started at a point that wasn’t mentioned in the story from round 4.

    24) The Time Before
    The first person works perfectly here as it gives the toy its own thoughts and feelings. I love the last line, because it makes you wonder what this was the beginning of, and I hope it was a better life for her, as the implied abuse was unsettling. Well done, because you made this story linger in my mind.

    25) The Spoon’s New World
    Good writing, but not erotic to me. It feels a bit ‘detached’ by constantly reading about ‘the spoon’. I think the piece would have been stronger if you have written it in the first person perspective.

  14. It’s fair to say that (for the first time in the competition) I really didn’t enjoy this prompt, and I think it resulted in a much weaker set of entries than we saw in rounds 3 and 4 (my own included). For me, it felt more like a challenge better suited to a creative writing class than a contest like this – yes, most of the writers are here to develop and stretch themselves, but Smut Marathon demands a big time investment, and that means it also has to be *fun*. This round felt like a chore.

    That said, a few writers did manage to respond to the brief with something interesting, well-written *and* erotic, and they deserve a great deal of credit for that. I enjoyed 3, 5, 10, 15, 18, and 25, all of which found a different or creative angle to the challenge of giving a voice to something inanimate. I’m particularly impressed by those who really embraced the eroticism in their stories, as I found that very difficult to do this time.

    On the flip side, I don’t know whether it was because everyone was really straining to make their story erotic, or whether the increased word count made people relax a bit and stop relentlessly scrutinising every word, but I felt like too many entries this time suffered from an overuse of adjectives – in some cases, jarringly so. I’m not going to pick out the worst offenders, but there were a few stories I had to stop reading halfway through, because they were either relentlessly descriptive or unintentionally squicky/comic. It’s one thing to bear in mind for future rounds – well-chosen adjectives really lift a story, but they’re not without risk either!

    One last thing: for all my grumbling about this prompt, the one we’ve just received for R6 is *really* exciting! I’m already looking forward to planning and writing my story, and I can’t wait to see how everyone else tackles it 🙂

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