Smut Marathon 2019: Voting Round 2

Only two weeks ago the 102 writers who sent in stories for round 1, received the second assignment. It wasn’t an easy one. Having to start your story with something someone else has written, is never easy, but it is a good exercise in developing your own writing style, or to write something totally opposite from what you are used to do.

The assignment

The second assignment of the marathon is following another ‘tradition’ of the Smut Marathon: expanding on the words of others.

The second assignment was:

Use one of the entries from round 1 (not your own) to expand on what happens next.

Specific requirements
– mention the number and title of the story you use from round 1
– the story you use from round 1 may not be your own
– your story is between 100-125 words. No less, no more.
– give your story a title of 2-3 words

Congratulations to all writers who have sent in their stories (on time). In round 1 we had 102 writers, but below you will find only 88 stories. Like I said in the first voting round, don”t be alarmed by these numbers. This is part of the race. It happens in real marathons too, that people have to step out of the race after only a couple of kilometers.

At the end of this round some people will have to leave the race, as only 75 writers will advance to round 3. So come on, vote, vote, vote so you can make sure your favorites get through to the next round!

Please note: Entries are not placed in the order in which they have been received. A randomizer has been used to order the entries.

Fun facts

Of the 102 stories in the first round, 47 stories have been chosen to be continued in the second round. Some have been chosen only once, and others 2, 3 or more times. The two stories that have both been chosen the most (five times) are The Funeral by Jordan Monroe and The Letter by Sienna Walker.

What should you do now?

Read all entries, and vote for the three stories you like the best. Try to keep the assignment in mind when you make your choices. You have to vote for three stories — no less, no more. Don’t forget to click the ‘Finish Survey’ button when you have made your choices!

Please note:

  • Writers are not allowed to tell anyone which entry they have written!
  • You can only vote once.
  • The voting round closes on 8 March 2019 at 23.00 CET (see the countdown in the sidebar)
  • Results of the voting round will be published on this site on 10 March 2019 and then I will announce the author of each story.

One last thing

I know it’s a lot to read and even more to ask, but it would be lovely if you could leave as much feedback as possible on the entries, or to make it more manageable, please leave feedback on the three entries you chose as well as three entries you have not chose. Make sure your feedback is composed in such a way that the writers can learn something from it. This will be highly appreciated.

Enjoy reading and start voting!

~ Marie Rebelle
(Image from Flickr)


1) A Cathartic release

He was sitting on a sofa, a girl stretched over his lap – raining down blows on her behind.
Standing in the doorway, transfixed, I imagined myself in her place, exposed and at his mercy. He glanced up – locking eyes with me, and simply nodded. I was next.

“You’re next!”.

I startled from my thoughts, My hands trembled as I timidly walked up to him. He tugged one of my pigtails as he bent me over that same sofa. I felt a breeze as he lifted my skirt and rummaged threw his bag of pain instruments.

Whack!

I felt the sting of the flogger on my behind.

The blow was deliberate and hard. He struck me a second time, then a third, the hits became rhythmic as my body started to relax. The noise of the party started to slip away.

My thoughts switched off as my focus honed in on my breathing, and his hands on my body. I was floating as I felt his finger tips teasing me between blows.

Entry round 1: #66 Losing myself by MasterMHatter


2) Café Anthropophagos

He tugs my collar; I follow. But we’re not in the alley for another quickie.
He leads me through a kitchen, past chefs objecting to my intrusion on their domain, into a walk-in freezer.
Frost coats his body. For the first time, I see him: his form, his exquisite horror.

Retreat was as reflexive as the sting of gooseflesh and the aching tightness in her tits, but he caught her, his hand on her arm radiating a chill deeper than the cold around them.

In the flickering light the swirling darkness of his eyes shone like oil; the grooves and knobs of his blue skin under that glittering frost—undeniable.

This wasn’t her handsome restauranteur.

But his hand on her bare thigh felt familiar, edging up under her skirt, and the venomous languor that followed left her helpless, only the heated clench of her cunt to ground her.

Around them, meat hung on hooks, but when he dragged her close she sighed and when his fingers curled into her hungry cunt she whimpered for more.

Entry round 1: #71 Haunting Beauty by Marsha Adams


3) The Dance

These humans are just meat, a means to fill the agonising hole in her being. But tonight, Aeznell is drawn by something other than just the heady pheromonal cocktail.
Finally, she sees him waiting. Their eyes lock and the darkness within her surges, her cunt throbbing with power.
Feeding time.

She softly deploys one slender, stockinged leg, its viciously spiked heel biting into the floor of the club. One precise step after another, the demon walks the line of lust leading to this stranger like it’s a tight-rope; sculpted shoulders counterbalancing the sway of her hips.

He shifts uncomfortably, unconsciously. Good. Her gifts were not designed for comfort. She feels the ache of his erection as if it were her own, and she can tell he is feeling the heavy, hot pulse of her hunger mingling with his.

Abruptly, the music stops, and Aeznell waits, poised. The tight-rope stretches, thins, threatens to snap.

The beat drops. She begins the dance.

Entry round 1: #29 Succubus by Raven Lee


4) Falling Hard

That voice. Deep and gravelly, sending spikes of heat through her even before she turns. There’s hair-pulling, biting, licking on her mind as she takes him in, her eyes dropping down to his – name tag? Oh. Fuck. It can’t be him.
But of course, he is.

“If it isn’t Fleur du Mal. Or rather…” He squints at her tag. “Emily.”

“You look nothing like your avatar,” she ripostes. “At least, on the outside.”

“No, I’m not a literal scorpion,” he admits, offering a hand.

He expects her to shake it. After everything that’s been said…

Yet she takes it, and her arm becomes a lightning rod. Electricity sizzles in her belly, sparks crackle below.

“Let’s be adults,” he suggests, his voice low, one finger curling round to stroke her wrist.

“OK.” But her voice trembles with her knees.

“One thing, though.” He bends and his lips are at her ear, his hot breath a statement of intent. Her clit swells. “Die Hard is not, and will never be, a Christmas movie.”

Entry round 1: #65 Perpetual Adversary by Jo Henny Wolf


5) The Birds

One day in the cafeteria a tray plunks down in front of me, followed by a crisp white blouse with barely a bump. Small tits turn me on: I’m interested. She’s staring at me now. Flummoxed, I noisily unwrap my straw as I fumble for my name.

‘Is it just me or is it hot in here today?’

She undoes two buttons and shakes the front of her blouse, rippling a breeze onto her chest. Leaning forward slightly, her tiny breasts flutter in and out of view.

She suddenly shoots me a look as fiery as her red hair.

‘I need some fresh air. Bring the drinks.’

We enter the old hide by the lake, like a couple of kids playing hooky. She tests me on the birds. My knowledge is lamentable but I recognise a heron and as a reward she lets me slide my hand inside her blouse.

She utters the faintest of sighs.

‘Too much?’ I ask.

‘No. That’s good. What did you say your name was?’

Entry round 1: #100 Food Court by Elliott Henry


6) Perfect Camouflage

He was rock hard. No woman had done that, just by staring – staring with ‘come to bed’ eyes. She only had to ask…
His cheeky grin drilled an ache between her thighs. She smiled back, chest banging inside her like no lover had. Yet. She licked her fangs.

Plastic costumery, he smirked to himself as she approached. Such sweet irony. Wannabes made delightful prey, incredulity and terror spicing their rich blood; piquant sauce.

She prowled closer, all belladonna eyes and sultry pout, flicking her gaze at the fire exit and back to his impish, eager smile. “Shall we?”

“I’d be delighted.”

He let her lead him. Drank in her musky aroma as she hiked the tight red skirt and pushed him to his knees. Sighed in satisfaction when she clenched and shuddered around his darting tongue. Licked his lips in anticipation.

Froze in shock as her wooden stake ripped through his ancient flesh.

“The pleasure was all mine.” whispered Olivia Van Helsing to the still-warm ashes scattering on the night breeze.

Entry round 1: #32 Night Eyes by Ina Morata


7) The First Timer

She wants my number.
Why wouldn’t she? Women love green eyes, muscle and a little stubble. She plays with the zip on her nurses’ uniform; it’s not because the air-con is on the fritz.
An eyebrow raised, she mouths again, pointing at the digital readout. She wants my number. Oh.

“Come this way sir”, she says with a smile. “It’s alright to be nervous.”

Did I look nervous? Sure, I’d never done this before. But everyone felt like this at first right?

“In here. I can tell you’re going to do well, just relax.”

Without another word, she snaps on a pair of gloves, removes my trousers, squirts some lube and begins to work my hardening erection vigorously. I feel my orgasm building as she grabs a specimen jar, before inserting a finger inside me, pressing firmly against my prostate. I empty myself with a cry and the nurse removes her hand, seals the jar and leaves with a nod.

I’m left alone, bewildered; wondering when the Dentist will be coming by for my checkup.

Entry round 1: #60 Next by Wyf Runts


8) The upgrade

Number seven. The buyer paused as her dark eyes traveled down his physique. He held her gaze when it rose again. Her fingers retraced the path; he failed to flinch, even when she tested the size and heft of his manhood. She smirked, gave an amused breath, and moved on.

Number eight – the last. Eight just didn’t look right; too clean, skin fresh, raw. Back to Seven. He was expensive but he had the stats she desired. She closed her guide with a snap of finality. “Have him sent to the apartment.”

The vibrant green of the atmospheric haze from level 245 backlit Seven as he stepped from the lift.

He was built for tweaking; input jacks and buttons to upload new images and stims. But he was principally human and physically impeccable. She had a delicious thought. “Why not fuck him before I start messing around with boosts?”

After a wholly satisfying pounding, she uploaded the assassin’s upgrade she had ‘acquired’ and secreted.

“Time to earn your money Seven”.

Entry round 1: #101 Auction Block by T.C. Dale


9) The Internet Stranger

You want the first time we meet to be as I open the door to the hotel bedroom.
I already know what you will be wearing for me.
You don’t yet know what I have in store for you.

Her scent pervades my nostrils as I appraise the naked body kneeling before me. If I couldn’t smell her, I’d know she’d played, as instructed, from the tell-tale blush above those heavy, dusky rose-tipped tits, and from her flush beneath the blindfold. My cock lurches against its confines, knowing that her cunt will be hot, swollen and dripping – for me.

My eyes flick to her perfect pout. I instantly want it swollen and dripping with drool after I’ve fucked that pretty face of hers. I circle her, feeding off her shallow breaths. Fear is such a turn on.

I still instantly when he silently enters the room. Will she realise it’s her husband fucking her and not me, the internet stranger?

Entry round 1: #55 Room 218 by toolie


10) Unlocked Fantasies

I knock on the door. When it opens, I draw in a sharp breath. We’d exchanged pictures, but he’s even more gorgeous in person.

My eyes travel down his naked body, stopping at his caged cock.

In my clammy palm, I clutch the key he sent me.

“A wonderful gift darling!” I exclaim, pulling my husband Jeb into the apartment.

Sitting down I watch, surprised, as hubby undresses. Is he really fulfilling my guy-on-guy fantasy? I throb when Jeb winks at me. He’d arranged everything.

Two naked men – hunks of solid masculinity furnished with delicious cocks – displayed for me. Acting as voyeur, I recline as the host kneels to masturbate Jeb. His mouth takes over whilst fingers knead my man’s drumskin-tight buttocks.

I lean forward, entranced by the erection sucked into that handsome stubbled face. White liquid spills from manly lips, our caged friend turns towards me. Spreading my legs I lean back and feel the come-coated tongue lap at me. I remember the key and reach for the cage.

Entry round 1: #89 First Date by Karsyn Stiles


11) Filthy Silhouettes

Parked on a country lane, they’re in the back seat and at each other’s buttons. Lips on necks, hands on breasts, fingers hunting sweating skin beneath tight clothing. Hard bodies press together–hot, wet, sticky, panting–desperate to escape into one another and be freed.

Scrambling into the cool night air, she hurriedly bent over the trunk. Pulling her skirt up he found nothing but a wet, willing cunt and wasted no time driving into his date, pinning her against the car.

Approaching headlights were creating a filthy silhouette against the side of the road, as a car slowed to a stop and turned their lights down. She didn’t seem to notice, and he damn sure wasn’t going to blow his chance to blow his load. He picked up the pace, enjoying their unexpected audience. Yanking his cock from her pussy, he jerked it against her soft skin finishing with a low echoing groan.

The stranger continued down the dark road, becoming nothing but a faint pair of red lights.

Entry round 1: #38 Thunder Road by April Garrus


12) Temple Mount

He wanted to see her. To have more than an unseeing fumble. He begged, he pleaded, he whispered beseechingly into her soft thighs. She reached out from under him and flicked on the lights. Naked and trembling, she lay before him like an offering.

His heart stopped.

She slithered from beneath him as his skin faded from rich brown to pale grey. Gently, she pulled on his shoulders and turned him on his back. His beautiful, thickly muscled form hardened. All of it, which pleased her despite the curse.

Extending her arms, she called forth her magic and lit the temple’s torches, bathing the cavernous chamber in warm light. She trained her gaze back to her stony charge, noticing how his flesh had turned smoother.

Lowering herself onto the figure’s impressive length, she looked up at the massive statue of Athena. The last time she’d been here, she’d been raped by that goddess’s uncle. Now, finally, she reclaimed her pleasure in the very spot where this curse befell her.

Entry round 1: #102 Medusa by Chloe Sheila


13) Game Change

Emma let Steve’s cock slip from her mouth and scanned the room. Heat rose from the mass of bodies joined together like Tetris pieces on the warehouse floor. A tall, loose-limbed man padded over, erection bobbing in front of him. His shy grin cut through her.

She nodded once. Yes.

Slowly parting her lips to let him enter, she was surprised to see him kneeling down between her thighs instead, forcing them apart. She shifted uncomfortably on the hard floor. This wasn’t what she’d expected. Around her, moans and groans of sexual activity filled the air – intense, yet muted. She scanned the room to find Adam. That dark-haired back of a neck bobbing up and down between a beautiful blonde’s thighs might be his – but she couldn’t be sure. She was about to sit up when …

”Ah!”

With one insistent thrust the stranger buried two fingers inside her cunt. Emma squirmed, clenching her teeth to stifle another moan.

Entry round 1: #86 Tasting Menu by Exhibit A


14) Rock Show

Our eyes meet across the cacophony of rock music and grinding bodies. I hold your glance as we dance through the crowd to each other. You touch my face, slick with sweat, grab my hand, pull me outside. Fresh air washes over us. You turn and our lips collide.

I lock on to your lips, embracing the kiss with violent enthusiasm. The night air chills my sweat drenched flesh, sending a shiver through my body. I grab your hips, craving your warmth. You respond; pushing your pelvis against me, soft breasts pressing in to mine. A bolt of arousal shoots down my spine. Music thunders in my ears.

With a sudden hard push of your lips, you break free, beaming face lit up with excitement. You scream “I love this song!” and drag me back in to the hot, gyrating sea. Contagious energy surges through me. We shout the words in unison, one fist raised in the air, the other clutching fiercely to yours, our grip intensified by the fear we’ll be swept apart.

Entry round 1: #87 Collision by Jade Greene


15) Backstage Fright

Considering the cost of the theatre tickets she should be watching the show. But a look to her left catching his eye was the only distraction she needed. Unsure if the glance back was a genuine look, or a coincidence she dared to peep again a little longer this time.

It was definitely genuine. The provocative show they had attended featured an actor Cate did not know, but Lorena was dying to see was going to go bottomless on stage. Everyone was clamoring to see his goods, but Cate preferred this man’s eyes accompanied with his soft smile. How was she to know he would burst onto the stage from the audience, and go bottomless?! She had known nothing about the show’s format.

But she knew she was terrified waiting backstage with Lorena, waiting for the autograph Lorena wanted. He caught her eye—again, and she blushed deeply remembering his exquisite package. He was entirely exquisite, and when he took her Playbill—not Lorena’s—his proximity was like an electric shock.

Entry round 1: #3 Peep Show by Gilly Langley


16) Spit and Polish

The mirror showed a stranger bringing to life the wild curls between my wife’s thighs, his head moving like music as her body danced to the rhythm of his tongue. As a powerful exhale sculpted a path through her bourbon bush his hungry, emerald eyes caught my shadow creeping closer.

My mirror-black brogues make no sound on the bokhara rugs that cover the floor of this, her playroom. I kneel behind her sculpted, glorious, lover. His balls are smooth and tight in my hand, weighty. His cock is magnificent, hard and oiled like the rest of him. I stroke it. It is like a glass tusk sleeved in warm velvet. I find and peel the slippery tip. He groans. I stand, move to her. Meet her eyes.

“You’d like that in you.”

She nods, and he uncurls, placing the flared head of his lovely cock on her spit-glossy slit. She unbuttons me, engulfs me. Hand fitted to her skull I fill her mouth and throat. As she sucks, I imagine fucking that young, golden arse.

Entry round 1: #28 Oral Affair by Aurora Glory


17) Unconventional Convention

That voice. Deep and gravelly, sending spikes of heat through her even before she turns. There’s hair-pulling, biting, licking on her mind as she takes him in, her eyes dropping down to his – name tag? Oh. Fuck. It can’t be him.
But of course, he is.

Ajax’s reputation preceded him. A Dominant, with the presence of a swaggering pirate. Not like her first Dom. Back then, she was a timid baby sub. But, over the years, Zelda had become a Switch, with desires and tastes all her own. When he put his oversized hand on her forearm, she did not draw it away. She merely growled, “Ajax. You are touching me.”
“I want your attention, Pet,” he leered.
“I am no one’s Pet,” she snapped.
“And isn’t that a shame?” he smiled kindly and released her arm. “How long have you been without,” his gray eyes dipped to her name tag, “Zelda?”
“Collar-free for three years.”
“And…single?”
“No,” she smirked.
“Complicated?”
“Aren’t all relationships?”
He chuckled, “Let’s grab a drink.”
“Yes.”

Entry round 1: #65 Perpetual Adversary by Jo Henny Wolf


18) Friend as Bonus

It was his smile she noticed first. That half shy, half cocky grin that lit up his face and blue eyes. She decided she was going to end the evening with him in her bed. She wanted to see what his smile looked like in the morning.

Tiny little problem. How was she going to make clear to him what her plan was? First of all: she had to get rid of the woman he was dining with. Secondly, she needed a lot of persuasion power. Rose was badly in need of a plan. She asked her girlfriend for help. Her competitor went to the loo. Girlfriend followed her, promising to keep her busy for at least five minutes. Rose went to Mister Blue Eyes and whispered in his ears. His smile was even more shy now. He grabbed his coat and together they left the restaurant. He was on his way to the best fuck of his life. With this very bold woman. And with her helpful girlfriend as bonus.

Entry round 1: #10 Blue Eyes by Quill-Driver


19) Do You Dare?

Black rimmed eyes, winged perfect. A bold red lip, careful fingers slipping around a coupe. Tweed three-piece, he straightens his tie, she raises an eyebrow. She is unimpressed, but watching. He moves to the stool next to her and looks down at it. She considers and then nods, yes.

They greet one another and he orders a drink for himself. He smells of sandalwood and cloves, pulling her in. Sensing her hidden desire, he wants more.
“Meeting a friend?” he asked.
“No, you?” she responds.
“Yes. A few actually,” he says “Want to join us?”
“Oh, no, thank you.” She moves to leave the bar.
“I didn’t mean to chase you away.”
She smiles. “You didn’t. I’m going to the bathroom. Care to join me?”
Seeing the dare in her eyes, he says, “Sure.”
Closing the door behind them; their mouths, tongues, hands exploring. Needing, wanting, primal actions leaving them breathless.
“Damn, you’re good, baby. We need to do this again.”
“I thought you might like that little scene, darlin’.”

Entry round 1: #67 May I? by Jack Stratton


20) All For Naught

The robe slides from her shoulders, a slow reveal of a ripe, lived-in body. Rounded, soft. A body she’s sharing with me. With us. Like Goya’s ‘Naked Maja’, she reclines on plump cushions. Smiling. Watching. I smile back and lift my charcoal to the paper on my easel.

I instruct my models to remain still while I work for the smallest shift can unhinge hours of labour. We sit in silence – our focus dominated by each other. I tend to my craft slowly, minutes ticking by as I replicate the smooth edges of her body on the page. My hand frames her face, charcoal adding life to the eyes and the coy twist of her smile. She moves and my eyes follow, glued to her form. One hand slides past her jaw and down the channel between her breasts, the smile disappearing as a single finger slips between her thighs. My charcoal snaps against the easel. She laughs and I crumble: masterpiece forgotten as I move to her side.

Entry round 1: #6 Drawing Room by Andra Ashe


21) The Lunch Shower

Her face flushed when she met his smiling gaze across the office. Her breath caught, just as it does every morning when she first sees him. She felt a rush, lightheaded, her whole body aflutter and alive with sensations she didn’t fully understand.

The morning was long and boring. She took every opportunity to tease him across the desks licking her lips and looking at him suggestively.
As folk drifted away for their long desired lunch she upped the teasing. Dropping a pen on the floor and doing a full bend and snap to pick it up.
Try as he might, his arousal began to stir.
Beckoning with a finger she left the room. He got up and followed conscious of his growing erection.
She lead him to the shower cubical, no words, just wanton looks.
Locking the door behind them. His hard cock was bulging in his jeans, wanting this hot hard fast fuck now. But she was having none of the rushing.

Entry round 1: #15 Office Crush by Stella Kiink


22) Feeding Time

Tanned skin, lean muscle, a mouth that curves with the hint of a smile: the new mailman delivers in more ways than one. He raises a hand and I picture it around my throat, pinning me down as we fuck. I smile and walk inside, leaving the front door open.

She’s there again, curvy body and long blonde hair, I get hard picturing her juicy red lips wrapped around my cock. She turns to go inside and I watch her perfect ass bounce in those shorts. She leaves her door open and I take it as an invitation. I find her waiting just over the threshold. Face to face, breaths mingling, our eyes never leave each other’s. I pull her tight against me and one hand moves up and fists her hair. A light tug to pull her head back and a whimper escapes her lips.

A growl rumbles from his chest and his lips seize mine. He pulls my head back more making my neck more accessible and sharp teeth sink into my flesh.

Entry round 1: #7 The Letter by Sienna Walker


23) Late Charge

Black rimmed eyes, winged perfect. A bold red lip, careful fingers slipping around a coupe. Tweed three-piece, he straightens his tie, she raises an eyebrow. She is unimpressed, but watching. He moves to the stool next to her and looks down at it. She considers and then nods, yes.

He sits and smooths down his tie. A gleam of sweat along the edge of his recently trimmed hair.

She ignores his nervous tells, turns back to the television. Peering over the rim of her glass, she sips and grins from the hidden corner of her mouth. Her team is winning; so is she. Without looking at him, she says, “You’re late.”

“I—”

She silences him with one finger. Gaze still pinned to the screen she reaches over, between his legs, and gives his strongest tell a squeeze.

He thumps into her palm. She is pleased. Brow raised even higher, she traces her sanguine smile with her tongue. “At least you still know what happens when you’re late.” Her eyes lock on him. “Let’s go.”

Entry round 1: #67 May I? by Jack Stratton


24) Familiar

She scanned the crowd looking for her friend… and saw him staring unabashedly at her. He licked something off of his finger, and suddenly her dress felt too thin.

He drank in her curves…he could practically feel her smooth skin on his lips. He needed to know her.

As Matt moved towards Victoria, she could see his chest, his stomach, his hips, his cock pressing against the fabric. She inhaled, her breasts filling her dress, pushing through to get a look at him, too.

“Hey, Vic. Nice pin.” She touched the cold metal orchid on her chest.

“Oh, thank you. It’s been so dreary outside that I wanted to bring a bit of spring with me.” The weather? “Newly single” was not looking very good on her, even if Matt had known her for years.

He sat next to her at the bar, his trousers managing to keep him contained. Unmistakable wetness flooded her. Victoria didn’t mix her work life with her private life but she might have to make an exception.

Entry round 1: #64 Bar Fly by K. Avery


25) Drinking Game

He would always remember the look on her face as he saw her standing at the far end of the bar. Her expression was curious – questioning. A gaze unafraid let him know she’d noticed him – that she wanted him. And he could not stop himself from wanting her.

He felt his cock stirring and he shifted his weight, the fabric of his pants sliding against his shaft. His long fingers played an adagio on the bar as he contemplated his next move. Slowly, he raised his glass of Scotch, his green eyes still boldly locked with her warm, brown ones.

He took a generous swallow, the amber liquid warming him as it slipped smoothly down his throat. As he licked a few droplets of Scotch from his lips, he watched her smile brighten her face and her eyes darken with desire. She picked up her drink and slowly sipped through its straw, the act so innocent yet intimate it brought a flush to his face.

It was time for them to meet.

Entry round 1: #77 The Gaze by Frank Noir


26) Smoke and Fire

Smoke drifted from her ripped Columbia sweatshirt that didn’t reach far enough down her bare hips. Wisps of moisture steamed from her thighs into the chill night. I offered her my Edgar Allan Poe throw as firetrucks wailed to the apartments. She wreathed it around us both, and smiled.

I tossed her my pair of Tetris block leggings. When she pulled them up, I tried to look away but I got a flash of her rose-colored thong.

She pulled at the shirt. “It’s just us girls?” The ripped, smoke-stained garment hit the nearby trash can. The bra underneath didn’t match her panties. Did it ever when you weren’t expecting… Whatever this was?

Liv stepped over to me.“I wanted to thank you for keeping me warm and offering your futon.”

I tried to wave it off, but she wove through my arms and kissed me, pale pink lips on my dark purple. Lipstick I’d put on to go clubbing.

I’d never been so glad to miss the boots and cats and boots and cats.

Entry round 1: #82 Living Fever by Owen Latchkey


27) Body over mind

On the bus home, summer was evaporating from every pore of my body. A guy comes, sits, invades my space with his long tanned legs. Heat acts like glue between his skin and mine. He smells of bergamot and soap. I glance, he catches my stare by surprise. We smile.

It’s obvious that he’s self-assured bordering on cocky and too handsome for his own good. I do dislike his type but my body always disagrees. I blame the long, hot day on the beach as a familiar tingle nestles itself in my groin. I feel drops of sweat trickle down between my braless breasts. My bikini was still too wet when I left the beach. I now regret having only my pareo wrapped around me. His gaze lingers on my cleavage before following my curves to my barely covered thighs.

“Fucking hot,” he says. I assume he’s referring to the temperature in the bus. But my pussy is convinced he means me. She wants his cock. I think I do too.

Entry round 1: #23) Bergamot Summer by Athelgyth Alot


28) A Second Chance

This was the wrong place for arousal.
My mentor’s casket commanded everyone’s attention but my own. I was transfixed by his daughter as she approached the bier. The modest, black attire hugged her figure and I couldn’t ignore her body’s movements.
Her eyes found mine. I swallowed and she spoke.

“Thank you all for coming today…”

I tried to look sombre, as the occasion dictated –I could do nothing but smile and return her gaze.

She continued to deliver her father’s eulogy, intended for the amassed, but I felt that she spoke only to me.

My eyes took in her curves as she recounted events and happy memories from their past together. She’d changed a lot in the ten years since we’d been together, and I found myself reminiscing over the times we had spent surreptitiously making love in her father’s workshop. Thinking instead of the stolen moments I’ll forever cherish, rather than the man who taught me all I know.

With her father gone, there was nothing to stand between us now.

Entry round 1: #76 The Funeral by Jordan Monroe


29) Like Her Father

This was the wrong place for arousal.
My mentor’s casket commanded everyone’s attention but my own. I was transfixed by his daughter as she approached the bier. The modest, black attire hugged her figure and I couldn’t ignore her body’s movements.
Her eyes found mine. I swallowed and she spoke.

Her voice sounded so much like his, all low and warm and husky, even as grief made the words thick and clumsy on her tongue. My gaze moved from her face to the cue cards she clutched in a tight grip, and I wondered if there were more ways they were alike. If her hands would feel the way his did, soft skin and a firm touch as they worked their way down my torso. If maybe her lips would feel a little like his pressed against mine, my fingers carding through her dark hair as I pulled her closer.
Her gaze narrowed, and I remembered where I was. Something in the pit of my stomach lurched, and I looked down at my clasped hands.

Entry round 1: #76 The Funeral by Jordan Monroe


30) So Very Yes

He wandered into the bathroom when he saw her. He froze, watching droplets of water race down her sensual body, before his eyes matched hers. He blushed furiously before running out, dropping his towel as he did. She smirked silently, knowing it had only been an accident.

She couldn’t help herself after quickly drying off, and picked up the forgotten towel dropped by the startled stranger. Still smiling to herself, she walked to her flatmate’s room and lightly knocked. The door opened and the stranger peeked his head out.

“You dropped this,” she said with a straight face. The cute stranger opened the door wider, giving her a big grin. Their eyes traveled up and down each other, her flatmate sitting up in bed, breasts bare for everyone to enjoy.

“Want to join us?” her flatmate asked with a huge grin, knowing it was something they had talked about and planned the night before.

“Oh yes. So very yes!” she exclaimed with excitement, her cunt throbbing with need even more than before.

Entry round 1: #11 Accidental Show by Hikari Kitsune


31) Perfect Pair

She could feel it in her cunt. That first look, first glance, first connection; she could feel it in her cunt. A liquid warmth that filled her and drowned her and spilled over, drenching her entirely. How could she ever look away?

She couldn’t.

And the woman staring back at her didn’t either. Her head was tilted back, taking him missionary style, his face buried into her neck. She looked to be in pure ecstasy while he fucked her, mouth wide open, eye lids hanging low. There was determination in the way she kept eye contact.

They weren’t like any couple there. They were electric in the way they pleased each other. She’d been watching them all night mingling. She wanted to openly touch herself. To masturbate for the woman who’s eyes told her more than her pussy could handle, but she was much too self aware. Instead, she just kept on looking. Her eyes shifting from his thrusting cock and back into the woman’s alluring gaze.

Entry round 1: #59 First look by The Other Livvy


32) Hidden Agenda

It was his smile she noticed first. That half shy, half cocky grin that lit up his face and blue eyes. She decided she was going to end the evening with him in her bed. She wanted to see what his smile looked like in the morning.

Would it be lazy and liquid or perhaps big and bright? Or even more thrillingly, would that beautiful mouth be latched onto a breast doused in sunshine and perfumed with the night before?

She moved her purse off the chair beside her and he took the cue and sat down. He smelled like her favorite season winter – woody and aromatic. She sighed.

The bustling bar fell away as they shamelessly flirted for hours and she made sure to swing her hips when she went to powder her nose. On her way back with freshly glossed lips and an extra blouse-button undone she rehearsed to herself, “Would you like to go have a drink at my place?”

And then she saw the empty table.

Entry round 1: #10 Blue Eyes by Quill-Driver


33) An Unexpected Consequence

Had she known, when he offered his hand to shake, that these were the fingers that would one day be wrapped around the handle of the riding crop painting stripes of fire across her rear, she might have paid it more attention.

The same order always precedes that particular ecstatic pain.
“Kiss my hand.”
And she does. Reverently. She kisses the scar on his third knuckle and the place where his vein bulges in his wrist. She kisses the lines on his palm and sometimes she wonders if their tissue paper paths correspond with her own.
She finds herself looking at hands the way she used to look at shoulders in a suit or thighs on a rugby pitch. She smiles at the girth of fingers. She delights in a firm grip. Once, she watched open-mouthed as a friend performed complex card tricks, mischievously designed to tickle her newfound kink.
She discovers more about herself every day.

Entry round 1: #34 In Hand by Justine Elyot


34) Even Better

He was sitting on a sofa, a girl stretched over his lap – raining down blows on her behind.
Standing in the doorway, transfixed, I imagined myself in her place, exposed and at his mercy. He glanced up – locking eyes with me, and simply nodded. I was next.

When summoned, I removed the silk robe, letting it slip to the floor.

His dark eyes steady on mine, he held up a finger and swept a circle in the air with it. I spun, slow, so he could appraise my naked body from every angle.

Facing him again, I asked, “Please spank me, sir?”

Anticipation danced on my skin. My blood ran wild through my veins. My tits ached with desire, the nipples tight buds.

He shook his head. “No.”

Disappointed, I thanked him for his consideration.

As I turned to leave, he spoke again. “You don’t need my hand or belt or a paddle. What that ass of yours needs is my cock.”

My frown turned into a smile.

Entry round 1: #66 Losing myself by MasterMHatter


35) Successful Shopping

Emma let Steve’s cock slip from her mouth and scanned the room. Heat rose from the mass of bodies joined together like Tetris pieces on the warehouse floor. A tall, loose-limbed man padded over, erection bobbing in front of him. His shy grin cut through her.

She nodded once. Yes.

Wiping the semen from her face she crawled towards him. Dressed and behaving like a cum-slut-whore, the little shopping trip to Wet Dreamz that morning had served her well. Victoria’s Secret was her usual go-to place for sexy, but they were too upscale for what she had in mind. Before her marriage ended, Emma wouldn’t have dreamed of shopping at a gritty strip mall.
“Your breasts will look yummy in that brassiere, darling!” sang the sissy boy as he bagged her purchase. Emma loved his eye-shadow and asked of the color.

Crotchless boyshorts and her new Goodnight Kiss Naughty Shelf Bra, plus rouge on the nipples made a perfect outfit to stand their cocks tall. She disappointed no one.

Entry round 1: #86 Tasting Menu by Exhibit A


36) For the Tribe

The cold black water rushed over the cliff, onto his dark curls, and taut chest. He moved slowly, carelessly wiping the soap across his sun burnished body, and absently fondling his cock. He was startled to see her; staring, fingers deep in her cunt, and pleasure on her face.

Derek looked up from the cascade of water. A woman was watching him, hand buried in her heat. She smiled and his world went dark.

Derek woke to find a mask over his eyes while his arms and legs were tightly bound. Soft hands caressed his chest, arms and legs with a warm oil. Whispers of a song he didn’t recognize, sandalwood scents and warmth filled his senses. His head was raised, a cup pressed to his lips. As the sweet liquid went down his throat, Derek’s body raged with an electric anticipation. His cock hardened and a woman’s heat enveloped him.

Derek heard someone whisper, “He will be good breeding material for the tribe.”

Entry round 1: #24 The Waterfall by E.L. Byrne


37) Delivered by Hand

Victoria followed the trail of dirty panties littering the floor beyond Diego’s unlocked apartment door like a timeline of their postal adventures. Their first meeting hinged on adherence to her instructions. Triumph bloomed when she reached his grin and obedient offering, her lavender G-string, tightly encircling his cock and balls.

Admiring the heft of his thickly veined shaft, the weight of his balls, heavy in the palm of her hand, she knows she’ll not have to wait long to feel the delicious explosive release in her face. “Would you like your gift now, or later?”. The deep baritone voice from behind jolts her from her thoughts, twisting her head she sees a handsome older man, beautifully dressed, strong tanned face. “My son speaks little English, I’ve been translating your letters”.

On her flight home, she closes her eyes to remember the scene that she knows she will replay many times. Her dress bunched above her hips, eyes locked on the father as the son pulls the wet silk from her cunt with his hungry mouth.

Entry round 1: #33 Scenic Route by Carolyna Luna


38) Early encounter

Shivering in the pale January sunlight filtering through the cafe window, she tugged the gauzy scarf tighter around her throat. She heard the bell over the door tinkle, and glanced up as he came in; their eyes locked for an instant, and she felt an immediate thrill of desire.

“Could it be?” Miriam thought. He wasn’t supposed to meet her until dinner time. Yes, his body, tall and strong, would be able to carry her while she wrapped her naked body around him. His full lips kissing her with a promise of even more action on her clit.

“I will pick you up from work at the end of the day, wearing a black sweater”, he wrote in last night’s sexy, kinky email. Not a fancy business suit.

“Grande mocha to go, please”.

She made the drink with shaking hands, thinking that she wouldn’t be able to wait a whole day. She wanted him now! Should she ask? She shivered again.

He took the drink, smiled at her and walked out.

“See you tonight.”

Entry round 1: #30 Morning Coffee by AmorousKestrels


39) Office Daydream

I see her: slight frame hidden by her oversized lab coat, face obscured by thick framed glasses. I am professional. I hide my desire, but she blushes when I catch her eye. In my mind, I wrap my arms around her, grabbing handfuls of thick auburn hair, kissing her neck.

She moans as my mouth travels over her skin. I get hard. I pull her away with one hand tangled in her curls, the other going to my zipper. A gentle tug on her hair and she goes gracefully to her knees, her tongue out to lick the tip of my cock before engulfing the head.

My hips jerk forward. She is warm and wet and I want to bury myself between her lips, fucking her mouth savagely.

A gentle cough brings me out of my fantasy. I blink as I focus on her face. She is still blushing, but the grin she is wearing tells me she knows exactly why I was distracted.

Entry round 1: #96 Be Professional by Jezebella


40) Sweet Jane

He was sitting on a sofa, a girl stretched over his lap – raining down blows on her behind.
Standing in the doorway, transfixed, I imagined myself in her place, exposed and at his mercy. He glanced up – locking eyes with me, and simply nodded. I was next.

I watched her squirm and struggle. I decided I would not fight or wiggle when his hand came down against my flesh. No, I would melt into his lap and lift my hips to welcome his strikes. He didn’t look the part of a villain or a sadist and I didn’t fear him, in fact, I revered him. His hands and stoic silence lured the curious, the depraved and in my case, the devoted. I watched as the girl in his lap got up and hugged him; there was a certain cool tenderness in his touch that I longed for. I waited until he sat back into the sofa and patted his knee.
“What’s your name?”
“Jane.”
“Come on, Sweet Jane. It’s finally your turn.”

Entry round 1: #66 Losing myself by MasterMHatter


41) Who is Watching

Parked on a country lane, they’re in the back seat and at each other’s buttons. Lips on necks, hands on breasts, fingers hunting sweating skin beneath tight clothing. Hard bodies press together–hot, wet, sticky, panting–desperate to escape into one another and be freed.

His cock painful as it enlarges in the confines of his jeans. Eyes fixed on the cinema screen feeling a slight blush. He wouldn’t have chosen it for their first date if knew about this scene. What will she think? Her fingers moving up his thigh let him know. A gasp escapes his lip as she squeezes hard through the rough denim. Glancing across, her eyes a glint in the semi dark a hungry grin on her face and a finger pressed to her parted red lips to remind him they are not alone. She turns back to the film but guides his hand under her skirt. His fingers explore the feel, heat and dampness of her underwear before pulling them aside. Can anyone see?

Entry round 1: #38 Thunder Road by April Garrus


42) Monster Hunter

These humans are just meat, a means to fill the agonising hole in her being. But tonight, Aeznell is drawn by something other than just the heady pheromonal cocktail.
Finally, she sees him waiting. Their eyes lock and the darkness within her surges, her cunt throbbing with power.
Feeding time.

Aeznell approaches boldly, hungry, but not too eager. Her prey turns toward her, his eyes roving her body.

“Hello handsome,” she says, breathing magic over him.

His pupils dilate and he smiles. “Hi beautiful,” he breathes back, and Aeznell knows she has him. Soon their in her car, her apartment, her bedroom.

She presses him down, not bothering to undress. She works his cock free, her cunt drenched with ravenous desire.

When the sharpened silver cross pierces her chest, she only has time to look up, shocked, before she crumbles to dust.

He takes a moment before gathering himself up. He’s still hard, but her death killed his desire. As he leaves, he takes out his phone. “Got another mess for you to clean up.”

Entry round 1: #29 Succubus by Raven Lee


43) Arranged Marriage

Repulsion pierced their thoughts; a thousand shards of bitter glass exploding in the brain as angry blood pulsed from heart to cunt and stayed there, swelling unwelcomely.
The crowd parted and they advanced towards one another, their bodies united in disgust and lust.

Seeing him had ignited something unexpected, a heat in her cunt that wouldn’t subside. She was on fire, aroused by this loathsome man. The ceremony ended with neither of them able to recall a single detail. Each fighting their own growing ache and desire for the other, repulsed by the very notion.

Making their way down the aisle they dared not look up as to give way some clue to the lustful, vile thoughts consuming them. Across the foyer to the small brides room their pace increased with every step. He had barely turned the lock in the door before hands began fumbling at his zipper.

“Bend over.” He needn’t worry about foreplay as the slickness dripping from her bare cunt invited him in.

Entry round 1: #50 Marriage by Hannah Lockhardt


44) Life After Death

This was the wrong place for arousal.
My mentor’s casket commanded everyone’s attention but my own. I was transfixed by his daughter as she approached the bier. The modest, black attire hugged her figure and I couldn’t ignore her body’s movements.
Her eyes found mine. I swallowed and she spoke.

“Come”

She led me away from the grave. The mourners parting at our approach, repelled by the tears pouring down her face, not wanting to intrude on her grief. The path she took disappeared into the woods away from the crowd, memories and the past.

She stopped abruptly, pulling me into the undergrowth. Hidden from view she unfastened my trousers, eyes cautioning me not to question as she freed my rapidly swelling cock. Her lips met mine, breathless and hungry as her hands completed my arousal. She turned away, lifting her dress to reveal her gorgeous young arse. Grasping her hips I buried my cock in her pussy and fucked her grief away.

Entry round 1: #76 The Funeral by Jordan Monroe


45) Made to Watch

She’s kneeling, naked from the waist down, blindfolded, gagged, a sign on her chest saying ‘Grope me’: a captivating mix of vulnerability and power. As he slips his fingers knuckle- deep inside someone else’s property he lifts the blindfold. Her blue eyes meet his, alive with surprise and welcome. She turns to me and smiles.

This is what I want. I must remember that this is what I want. My cock straining against my trousers is certainly a reminder that my body craves the aching arousal I find in jealousy. I may have tied her; stripped her; gagged her; but I am unable to touch her. Instead, this man – this other man – touches my wife, eliciting moans of pleasure that thrill and pain me.

With his fingers curled inside her, I can tell she’s close. I stroke my cock in time with his thrusts, till her face scrunches and tightens; we come together and, as instructed, he leaves immediately. Finally I can take her into my arms, my love and my life.

Entry round 1: #62 On loan by Joy Asitflies


46) Business Meeting

She could feel it in her cunt. That first look, first glance, first connection; she could feel it in her cunt. A liquid warmth that filled her and drowned her and spilled over, drenching her entirely. How could she ever look away?

He twirled a gold wedding ring around his finger and stared back calmly. Four cities this week alone. Four airport hotels. That pretty blonde sales rep in Amsterdam. The waitress in Rome. Conference season was hard, but there were ways to make it bearable.

She stepped towards him, eyes still focused on the half-smile tugging insistently at the corner of his mouth. Freeze-frame images skipped through her mind: those confident lips brushing over her nipples; his hands on her waist; on her thighs – squeezing hard, pushing them apart.

He thought about the 6am wake-up call he’d requested from Reception. The long day of meetings ahead. The bonus cheque already paid into his account…

Fuck it. Why not?

“Hi,” he said, leaning forward. “I’m Jake. Drink?”

Entry round 1: #59 First look by The Other Livvy


47) Special Delivery

Tanned skin, lean muscle, a mouth that curves with the hint of a smile: the new mailman delivers in more ways than one. He raises a hand and I picture it around my throat, pinning me down as we fuck. I smile and walk inside, leaving the front door open.

Seconds later I hear tentative footsteps and then a soft click. I’m on him like a hungry lynx, pinning that body to the back of the dark oak, nuzzling his exposed neck. One hand is in his short brown hair, grasping, tugging, and my knee pushing his taut thighs apart. The tent fronting his regulation navy shorts is immense.
My other hand makes its way down the rough cotton of his shirt, and rests firmly on the bulge, encircling it. He makes a feeble attempt to thrust his pelvis but I push forward and slam him against the door. I run my palm over his throbbing member, whispering in his ear, “Tonight, 8 sharp, keep the outfit on.”

Entry round 1: #7 The Letter by Sienna Walker


48) My Kalika

The moment I looked past my reflection in her spacesuit visor, she took my breath away. Her skin was blue, a purple flush rising in her cheeks as our gazes met. She was nothing like anyone I’d ever seen before. I wanted to stay there, floating, looking at her forever.

The beauty reached out, took my gloved hand, and slowly led me back to her base. Inside everything was a bright gleaming white. Even the bed.

She stripped slowly, the unfolding her cerulean limbs reminded me of the petals of a great flower, soft and trembling. That delightful violet blush had stayed put, and I watched as it crept down past her collarbones.

When I took her in my arms, I began to shake too. I ran my hand up the inside of her soft thigh, and gently broached the warm wetness I found at the top. Petals again.

One finger, then two. She gasped, and began to rock back and forth against me. Overcome, I pressed a heady kiss to her indigo mouth.

Entry round 1: #27 Xenophilia by Kelvin Sparks


49) Inner Monologue Failure

Fuck him.
Not that I would. More money than taste, as far as jewels go, but my god! his taste in women is superb. He introduces wifey, then swaggers off to leave us girls to it.
Our hands touch. Her silken throat makes glittering fortunes seem tawdry.

“Fuck who?”

“What?” I stammer. Shit- I hadn’t just thought the words. “Oh, no! I didn’t mean-”

The reflected red of my cheeks may have changed the color of the room. Her fingers curl around mine like they’re coming home.

“Don’t mind me – or him. He is oil to most people’s water.”

I fail to place her accent as she examines my hand. Her fingers across my palm and wrist send strange electricity up my arm, and through the rest of me.

“For this evening, I do not think he exists. But I think maybe you do.”

The glitter in her eyes pales the baubles around her neck. Her hand raises mine to her lips.

Fuck me.

“Yes,” she smiles, “That is more like it.”

Entry round 1: #43 Clasp by Ian Jade


50) The Kinetoscope

It was a bit of business in the blackout. She unbuttoned my flies and I breathed in her perfume as we manoeuvred blindly in the alley. Then the sudden white flash of an incendiary bomb, freeze-framed us, and we saw the sad desperation inhabiting our tired eyes.

He is already fucking her. Some jostle to get a view, in pale, juddering, artificial light.

Edward is facedown, stubble buried in Maisie’s neck. Maisie reclines, head thrown back, rouge lipstick sliding down her delicate jaw. Breasts spill from her best lilac-silk chemise: a heeled-shoe swings from her hooked leg. He could not be deeper inside of her. Ragged trousers slid to ankles, ripped shirt, expose scratches on Edward’s back and buttocks, where Maisie hungrily scoured flesh with her nails. Her hair is tumbling: bobby pins have come loose, her hat has slipped onto the tarmacadam.

The couple no longer care.

The Home Guard create a makeshift cordon around the bomb site. The crowd disperses. A soldier tosses a compassionate sheet over the Penny Dreadful.

Entry round 1: #68 Knee-trembler by Cousin Pons


51) Bless Me

You want the first time we meet to be as I open the door to the hotel bedroom.
I already know what you will be wearing for me.
You don’t yet know what I have in store for you.

I open the door. The habit you’re wearing looks nothing like the drab black and white frock I’d purchased online, your curves filing in its boxy lines.

“Mother Mary, to what do I owe this visit?”

You snake your delectable body into mine. “You know what I need,” you whimper, chestnut eyes peeking out from under the veiled headpiece.

I hold back an aroused smirk, staying in character. “I’m ready for you.” I close the door before you sink to your knees, the long black tunic pooling beneath us.

It isn’t long before I hear you gasp at the sight of my pulsing cock peeking out of black lace panties.

“Bless me,” I whisper before your warm mouth devours my length.

Entry round 1: #55 Room 218 by toolie


52) Incomplete Contrition

He was sitting on a sofa, a girl stretched over his lap – raining down blows on her behind.
Standing in the doorway, transfixed, I imagined myself in her place, exposed and at his mercy. He glanced up – locking eyes with me, and simply nodded. I was next.

There was nothing playful or erotic in what he was doing, no passion in his eyes or his hand as it crashed against the soft curves of her ass – this was practical. Purposeful. She was being chastised.

But her responses – they were so much more than the pain and penitence her position demanded. Yes, her cheeks burned crimson but her gasps as each smack rocked her – I knew them. They were excitement, they were the sounds I make when I imagine this, when my hand brings a flush to my cheeks. My thighs shake like hers, I writhe that way.

She was on the edge of orgasm and I was—

“Next!”

The bastard didn’t let her finish. That was her punishment.

Entry round 1: #66 Losing myself by MasterMHatter


53) The journey

Under the clock, waiting, trembling, heart racing. The rose, in button hole, makes people look, will she get the joke? The seconds tick, tock then she arrives, nervous to look at the clock. Their eyes lock, the sun shines making hers twinkle. The vision burnt to the minds eye forever.

The crowd pushes them apart. He looks around. Will she follows through? Tick, tock. He rushes in, walks to the compartment, hoping, febrile! Months of correspondence, he knows her, her writings, intimate dreams. Slowly the train starts. He tries to compose himself, one hand clutching the handle.
Breathe in, breath out.
Eyes on the floor, he slides the door. Red stilettos awaits him, a gasp. He follows the curves, takes in perfectly drawn stockings, passes the knees to find hands frozen in motion on the rim of her skirt. She was fidgeting, he notes. Delights at her blushing cleavage, smiling, he nearly loses himself in her half open mouth, tracing the red contours and reaches that twinkle, finally.

“Hello, I’ve been waiting for you.”

Entry round 1: #46 Tick Tock by ReadButLovely


54) Invitation

Tanned skin, lean muscle, a mouth that curves with the hint of a smile: the new mailman delivers in more ways than one. He raises a hand and I picture it around my throat, pinning me down as we fuck. I smile and walk inside, leaving the front door open.

The noise of the door shutting jolts me out of my day dream. I turn to see him standing in my hall, a smirk on his face.

“You need to be more careful; leaving your door open might be taken as an invitation”.

My face flushes and I can’t bring myself to look him in the eye. Instead I find myself looking down, my gaze fixed on his considerable bulge. Without thinking I lick my lips, lost in imagination, before I remember: this isn’t a fantasy, this man is standing in my hall and I have just licked my lips while staring at his cock. I can feel my body shaking with fear, desire, and embarrassment.

Entry round 1: #7 The Letter by Sienna Walker


55) The Sexiest Smile

Considering the cost of the theatre tickets she should be watching the show. But a look to her left catching his eye was the only distraction she needed. Unsure if the glance back was a genuine look, or a coincidence she dared to peep again a little longer this time.

He was still looking at her. His hazel eyes held her attention. The left corner of his full lips slowly rose into a delicious smirk. Her breathing deepened, breasts slowly rising and falling in the low cut bodice of her dress. Goosebumps formed like his fingers and not his gaze traced down to her breasts. She tightened her vaginal walls in a vain attempt to stop her clit from throbbing and the moisture from escaping to her thong. She looked away as her skin flushed, only to look back and lock eyes with the handsome stranger again. Both sides of his lips rose. He had the sexiest smile she had ever seen. She got up and excused herself from the theater box.

Entry round 1: #3 Peep Show by Gilly Langley


56) To Your Taste

She knelt. Conversation swirled around her. She swallowed and wiped her mouth, then felt a hand on her head, tipping it back. She opened her mouth obediently. Suddenly, unexpectedly, her blindfold was removed, and she looked up into the eyes of the next man in line.

They’d met a few weeks earlier- a brief encounter as the orchestrator of tonight’s events and the stranger parted ways as she arrived.

‘I know you want to fuck him.’ His stubble grazed her earlobe as they walked away. She eagerly anticipated an ‘and…’ or ‘but..’. It never came.

That same stubble grazed the same spot, as he leant in again, three weeks later.

‘I just thought it wise to see if he was… to your taste.

Happy Birthday’

Her tongue, of which she’d relied on so heavily up to now, was rendered obsolete as he thrust to the back of her mouth. But she already knew that he would be very much to her taste.

Entry round 1: #73 The Party by Jade Melisande


57) Yours, Sir

You want the first time we meet to be as I open the door to the hotel bedroom.
I already know what you will be wearing for me.
You don’t yet know what I have in store for you.

You lift your head at the click of the lock and creak of my footsteps. I close the door.

“Come.”

Blindfolded, naked, and kneeling, you crawl towards the sound of my voice.
Your long blond hair and the white cloth across your eyes paint a picture of captive innocence.

“Who are you?” I ask.

“Yours.”

“What are you?”

“Yours, Sir.”

I let the fall of the whip uncoil from my hand. It thumps against the floor; you shiver at the sound. Your spine straightens, your chin tilts up, and anticipation parts your lips.

“Present yourself.”

You turn where you kneel, offering the pristine canvas of your back to your Master. My hand traces your spine and cups your nape.

I’ve chosen well this time.

Entry round 1: #55 Room 218 by toolie


58) Inspiring Desperation

Her face flushed when she met his smiling gaze across the office. Her breath caught, just as it does every morning when she first sees him. She felt a rush, lightheaded, her whole body aflutter and alive with sensations she didn’t fully understand.

There were few things as intoxicating as being the recipient of a crush. To see someone’s eyes light up when you entered a room. To watch the effect you had on someone, how you could make them blush with a glance.

He was aware, always, and in the back of his mind, he kept a bookmark on her. In meetings and outings, he always acted appropriately, but he secretly studied her.

The cogs turned in his head, calculating when he would take advantage of that look in her eye — imagining what he could do to her. Thinking if she blushed at a smile, what might a touch do to her? Considering how he could manipulate that crush into desperation.

Entry round 1: #15 Office Crush by Stella Kiink


59) Art of Desire

The robe slides from her shoulders, a slow reveal of a ripe, lived-in body. Rounded, soft. A body she’s sharing with me. With us. Like Goya’s ‘Naked Maja’, she reclines on plump cushions. Smiling. Watching. I smile back and lift my charcoal to the paper on my easel.

I begin to stroke her form onto the paper, caressing it with the lines that form her curves. Softening the edges, my finger traces a pathway down her neck and over her breast. What would it be like to touch her flesh, to discover the rise and fall of her nakedness?

My mind paints the picture of her skin against mine as I create her, drawing a reality of my own. And all the time, I know you’re watching me, charcoal in hand, claiming my body from across the room. I return your glare with a look of pure need. Yes, you possess my body.

But you can’t possess my thoughts. Or my desires. They’re owned by my art alone. I call it ‘Infatuation’.

Entry round 1: #6 Drawing Room by Andra Ashe


60) Entrapment

You want the first time we meet to be as I open the door to the hotel bedroom.
I already know what you will be wearing for me.
You don’t yet know what I have in store for you.

I am still doing my make-up when you text me. I don’t answer, I am going to make you wait, play on your nerves. I imagine you pacing up and down in reception, avoiding the eye of the receptionist, trying not to attract attention. I finish applying my purple lipstick. With the thick application of powder I am pale, full Goth. I spray fragrance onto my pulse points, freeing the bewitching aroma. I smile and reach for my phone. I text you the invitation you will not refuse, to room 218. I hear the lift, hear footsteps in the corridor. You knock just as I am strapping on the harness from which projects my fattest dildo.

Entry round 1: #55 Room 218 by toolie


61) The Blended Composition

The robe slides from her shoulders, a slow reveal of a ripe, lived-in body. Rounded, soft. A body she’s sharing with me. With us. Like Goya’s ‘Naked Maja’, she reclines on plump cushions. Smiling. Watching. I smile back and lift my charcoal to the paper on my easel.

The charcoal outlines her body, a hollow silhouette on the paper. The powder slips under my fingertips, fading the sharpness of the lines forming her face. Her eyelashes tickle me. Our eyes meet, from woman to paper. Her look softens; even warms in shades of gray. Her cheeks feel soft as her cheekbones blur onto the paper. My fingertip runs down her jawline, the charcoal adds more shading, fingers becoming darker as the pigment rubs off of her skin. The back of my finger runs up her neckline, a lover coming to life on paper. The full lips on paper drawing from the full lips in life, both slightly parted, her soul now speaks.

Entry round 1: #6 Drawing Room by Andra Ashe


62) Killer Climax

The blood on my skin was still warm and my cock so erect it hurt. Looking up from the carnage, I watched the door open. The detective always came to see my artistry. Now she could see the artist. I smiled as she stared up at me, stunned but fearless.

Hidden from view a single finger glides between my slick folds. I gaze upon him, not with fear or contempt as people might assume, but with arousal.

The file containing his every crime is arranged before me, peppered with highlights of his bloodshed and carnage. My moral fibre tells me he is a monster. My body betrays me though; cunt twitching, breasts tingling as I watch him through the one-way mirror.

Fixated by his calm demeanour I rub my clit, as an inaudible moan escapes my lips. No remorse, no shame; he simply emanates a sense of curiosity and I shudder against my own fingers as I climax.

Focus and clarity are needed to interview a killer and nothing clears my mind like an orgasm.

Entry round 1: #56 Anticipation by Daire Faust


63) She owns me

I kneel, naked and obedient, eyes to the floor while fancy men’s shoes shuffle by, voices low and taunting. Wet. Ready. Slut.

Delicate ankles atop wine suede heels fill my limited view. My chin slowly rises, recalcitrant. Shameful wide eyes meet hers, teasing and enticing. My cunt flutters.

With her fingers tangled in my hair, she drags me crawling to a loveseat, where she sits like a queen with me at her feet. Nothing escapes her as she inspects me, sliding clever fingertips through my hungry slit and leaving behind the ache of yearning. My breath catches as she leans close, touching my lips. The scent of my eagerness envelopes me.

“Let me feel your tongue…” she rasps, voice cracking like embers licked by flames. I want to dip between her legs, but she stops me, the sole of her heel planted against my chest. “No. Through the leather of my shoe.” She drops her foot.

My skin humming, I bow and turn the wine color of her heels into a darker shade.

Entry round 1: #20 The Offering by bluesubmission


64) Holding Off

Looking around the room, she was able to pick him out by cock; that girth and length was food for fantasies. He knew it was her by those unforgettable lips; luscious and bright red that curved into a knowing smile when they locked eyes for the first time.

The vision of the glory hole came back to the forefront of her mind as he walked closer, his cock hard and ready for her. “Come to the nude bar often?” he asked, smirking.

“Less often than you’d like,” she retorted, taking a sip from her drink, carefully letting her tongue play with the drink olive on the toothpick. She thought it might’ve been her imagination, but somehow his dick got even harder.

He reached out his hand. “Care for a dance?” he said with a knowing wink. “We can finish our session upstairs,” he finished. She gave a sultry glance, before downing the rest of her drink.

“Let’s go,” she said, dragging him out to the dance floor. She’d make him wait, first.

Entry round 1: #17 Unforgettable by Sweeten Dirty


65) Made for Me

Eyes touch like a caress. Not a thunder clap, but a whisper full of decedent promises. A candle-flicker smile that lights up my darkest fantasies. We’re strangers, yet I taste her skin and vibrate with the sounds of her ecstasy. One word pounding between us like a battle drum: MINE.

Synapses sizzle with intention, prompting me to straighten my skirt. Her delicate wrists jangle as she admires the Ibanez. Fretboard’s much too wide for her hands, I think, and offer her the Satin Cherry Gibson instead. Peppermint enlivens the air when she reaches for it and a streak of rogue crimson from her layered shag falls over her cheek.

“Oh, she’s perfect!” she proclaims through a smile now blazing. Her silvery voice and the luxury of her fingers strumming the guitar strings intensifies the puddle in my stockings. The treble clef on her necklace dances across the sun-freckled valley of her cleavage as her impish gaze captures my own.

Swallowing hard, I offer, “she’s made for you.”

And you’re made for me.

Entry round 1: #94 Mine by Courtney Maguire


66) Pushing Up Daisy

This was the wrong place for arousal.
My mentor’s casket commanded everyone’s attention but my own. I was transfixed by his daughter as she approached the bier. The modest, black attire hugged her figure and I couldn’t ignore her body’s movements.
Her eyes found mine. I swallowed and she spoke.

I pictured her gripping the bier’s frame as I took her from behind, that black skirt fluttering over her porcelain ass. I ignored the rest of her speech, fantasizing over every imagined stroke. She smirked at me as she caressed the smooth wood of the coffin. Like she could read my mind.

A great mentor does not a great man make; a secret that she and I shared. What a fitting farewell for me to bend his daughter over the lacquered lid as I paid my respects to her cunt. While dozens of colleagues—business widows, power-hungry ass-kissers—watched. I’d pump into her until she was helpless, begging for release, shuddering under my grip. She’d cum when I allowed it. I was in charge now.

Entry round 1: #76 The Funeral by Jordan Monroe


67) A Simple Request

Had she known, when he offered his hand to shake, that these were the fingers that would one day be wrapped around the handle of the riding crop painting stripes of fire across her rear, she might have paid it more attention.

Instead she took those fingers in hers, casually leading him away from the party and into one of the deserted galleries of the manor. On her knees she opened his trousers, revealing the thick bulge she’d felt during their dance. He tasted of talc and sweat and she loved every inch as it passed between her lips.

Impatient, he brought her to her feet and pushed her onto the rococo sofa, lunging and hefting up her many skirts. His breath was hot on her thighs, and his tongue strong between them. She gripped the cushions, muscles seizing as she neared. Taking his hand, she guided it to her face, sucking the fingers before curling them around he throat.

“Choke me.”

Entry round 1: #34 In Hand by Justine Elyot


68) Hands that Bind

He was rock hard. No woman had done that, just by staring – staring with ‘come to bed’ eyes. She only had to ask…
His cheeky grin drilled an ache between her thighs. She smiled back, chest banging inside her like no lover had. Yet. She licked her fangs.

That riding crop wasn’t the only tool his fingers held during their relationship. His fingers held the wand that pulsated against her hot pussy. His fingers held her nipples tight and twisted them, sending tides of longing and wanting throughout her body.

His lips barely whispered the words “Cum now,” but she heard them and obeyed.

His hands grasp her hands above her head. His cock slipped into her mouth, parting her lips with the firmness of his member. Thrusting in and out, deeper down her throat, his lips told her to take all his hot cum.

She obliged and begged for more but alas, was not to be as he withdrew and replaced his cock with a ball gag.

Entry round 1: #32 Night Eyes by Ina Morata


69) The Assignment

One day in the cafeteria a tray plunks down in front of me, followed by a crisp white blouse with barely a bump. Small tits turn me on: I’m interested. She’s staring at me now. Flummoxed, I noisily unwrap my straw as I fumble for my name.

Cali gazed at the blank paper in despair, willing her brain to focus. Her composition assignment this week was to continue a story written by some stranger, but all she could think about was her handsome instructor… those strong shoulder muscles… that day-old stubble lining his jaw… the wondrous swell constrained within his slacks. How could she possibly think of crisp white blouses and a cafeteria tray with this sexy specimen on her mind? After all, he’s the only reason she registered for this class. Cali closed her eyes once again, and fantasized about unveiling his glorious cock and wrapping her luscious lips around it. Then, with complete disregard for her assignment deadline, her right hand unfastened her jeans and slid inside.

Entry round 1: #100 Food Court by Elliott Henry


70) Taking turns

He wanted to see her. To have more than an unseeing fumble. He begged, he pleaded, he whispered beseechingly into her soft thighs. She reached out from under him and flicked on the lights. Naked and trembling, she lay before him like an offering.

His heart stopped.

She let his stare trace her every curve and valley. Her body was clay soft, all tanned but her breasts, glistening like pearls under the light, filtering through the scarf covered lamp, and the triangle of smooth flesh below her belly. Like an arrow, pointing to where he had just been. He wanted to taste her while watching her melt like ice cream under his tongue. His cock twitched with anticipation.

“My turn.” With a wicked smile he tied her wrists over her head with his belt. Her erect nipples beckoned to be sucked hard. “You can watch but you can’t touch.” His voice low and hoarse sent waves of intense desire through her. Lust flickered inside her eyes. She had found her match.

Entry round 1: #102 Medusa by Chloe Sheila


71) You surprised me

She knelt. Conversation swirled around her. She swallowed and wiped her mouth, then felt a hand on her head, tipping it back. She opened her mouth obediently. Suddenly, unexpectedly, her blindfold was removed, and she looked up into the eyes of the next man in line.

His hand took hers, and lifted her firmly, to stand before him.

Her boss, in all his seductive, flirtatious, glory.

Well, well, he smirked, my little protege, naked and exposed, how does it feel knowing I watched you devouring three men, wrapping your mouth and lips around them, letting their cum dribble from your mouth? You may never have known it was me next.

His firm deep voice consumed her, nipples erect and pussy wet.

The party continued, a heady mix of lust and sex lingered, sensing her longing her stepped closer and placed his hand on her shoulder and she obediently dropped to her knees and let her mouth work magic, looking up at him, no blindfold needed, he smiled.

Entry round 1: #73 The Party by Jade Melisande


72) Food Glorious Food

One day in the cafeteria a tray plunks down in front of me, followed by a crisp white blouse with barely a bump. Small tits turn me on: I’m interested. She’s staring at me now. Flummoxed, I noisily unwrap my straw as I fumble for my name.

“Gina” I mumbled offering her my hand.
“Alice” came her reply in a soft dulcet voice. She had deep blue eyes.
“May I?” I asked trying to clear my throat.
“Certainly”
I followed sat and watched her make love to a cream cake. Her tongue caressed the cream like a moist vagina. Her lips clamped around the cherry as if it was a cli…
I gasped, closed my eyes and climaxed.

I opened my eyes. My breasts were heaving.
Alice smiled as she licked her fingers.
My panties were wet, very wet.
I smiled back totally spent and embarrassed.

This had to be the best tea break ever.

Entry round 1: #100 Food Court by Elliott Henry


73) A Caged Anointing

I knock on the door. When it opens, I draw in a sharp breath. We’d exchanged pictures, but he’s even more gorgeous in person.

My eyes travel down his naked body, stopping at his caged cock.

In my clammy palm, I clutch the key he sent me.

He leads me inside and offers me a beer. I gratefully accept as we stand in his kitchen, my eyes continually drawn to his caged cock as I sip my beer and make small talk.

I can’t stand this any longer, my cock grows hard inside my jeans. I whisper in his ear, “I want my way with you!”

He leads me to his bedroom, and kneels before me bowing his head. I stand in front and slowly unbuckle my belt. My pants drop and the buckle clunks on the timber floor.

I cup his downward face and lift it to drag over the tip of my erect cock. My first drop of precum oozes out, and I anoint his forehead with it.

Entry round 1: #89 First Date by Karsyn Stiles


74) That escalated quickly

Tanned skin, lean muscle, a mouth that curves with the hint of a smile: the new mailman delivers in more ways than one. He raises a hand and I picture it around my throat, pinning me down as we fuck. I smile and walk inside, leaving the front door open.

“Your door is open,” the mailman said. He froze with his hand on the doorknob, watching my shorts hit the floor. I held his gaze, pinching my nipples until they’re taut and aching. My desperate cunt dripped, he smirked, I waited. Then, leaving the door open, he grabbed my hand and spun me around. I rubbed my ass against his rigid cock, moaning as he slid thick fingers between my slippery folds. ‘Yes, fuck yes,” I begged as he forced me against the wall, hot breath on my neck, slipping his thumb over my tight bud. His other hand came around to cup my chin and abruptly yank my head back as he growled, “This feels like a party. Shall we invite someone else?”

Entry round 1: #7 The Letter by Sienna Walker


75) Wartime Lament

It was a bit of business in the blackout. She unbuttoned my flies and I breathed in her perfume as we manoeuvred blindly in the alley. Then the sudden white flash of an incendiary bomb, freeze-framed us, and we saw the sad desperation inhabiting our tired eyes.

She hesitated, and I pulled her close, my lust replaced by need for a different kind of connection. I knew she was crying. I didn’t ask why; it could be one of a hundred thousand reasons and right now, none of them mattered. She sobbed against me, breasts heaving against my chest, tears staining my shirt.

God those tears! Back in my lodgings, I pressed my shirt to my face, inhaling her perfume. Cock in hand, I imagined wet, wide eyes, smudged kohl, streaked mascara. Hand pumping faster now, images of cherry-red lips, more tears…

I stifled my moans as I came, any joy replaced by self-loathing at how I indulged my fetish for tears while the bombs dropped. It was my turn to cry.

Entry round 1: #68 Knee-trembler by Cousin Pons


76) Desire’s Edge

He twisted the knife, his blade doing the work. Her eyes became soft and unfocused as she crumpled from his arms, and he noticed how piercing a shade of blue they were, even as they faded. The assassin shook his head in sorrow; it was always the pretty ones.

“Cut!”

The director’s voice sliced through the sudden, thundering silence on the set. This take had been the one. Noah felt it in the silence; a benediction louder than applause.

He drew a ragged breath. Adele only now began to stir where she lay bonelessly at his feet. Her eyes opened, that shocking blue staring up into his. His groin throbbed and his hands shook.

He looked at the knife he still held, smeared red; back into her eyes. Saw the quick intake of her breath, the red staining her breast. Had she felt it too? Lust blooming in savagery, hidden behind the scene’s pretense. Fear and fascination warred within him; he ached to feel her, frightened, again.

For real, this time.

Entry round 1: #9 Cutting Edge by Wriggly Kitty


77) Parent Teacher Confidential

One day in the cafeteria a tray plunks down in front of me, followed by a crisp white blouse with barely a bump. Small tits turn me on: I’m interested. She’s staring at me now. Flummoxed, I noisily unwrap my straw as I fumble for my name.

Without hesitation, she interrupts my fidgeting. “My daughter needs an A.”

She touches my hand; I drop the straw. I look around but it’s early, no other faculty, barely any students and none I recognize. Her hand is warm. Older than mine. Soft, slender, naked. I note the absence of ring or polish. She squeezes; I look up to meet her insistent stare.

“Take me to your office if you want what comes next.”

She stands. Her blouse is tucked into snug riding breeches. Her legs are athletic, thighs built to wrap around something powerful, surely something more powerful than me, but here she is, waiting. Asking. Begging? She sees my consternation and laughs. “Well, Professor? Want to go for a ride?”

Entry round 1: #100 Food Court by Elliott Henry


78) The Mailman’s Wife

Tanned skin, lean muscle, a mouth that curves with the hint of a smile: the new mailman delivers in more ways than one. He raises a hand and I picture it around my throat, pinning me down as we fuck. I smile and walk inside, leaving the front door open.

I open one eye, peeking into the monochrome cast of early morning. The window, a white square against the dark wall, reminds me of an open door and the shapely silhouette that took my brazen invitation ten years ago. I roll over to the warm spot, only recently vacated.

“Sleep. I’ll go start the coffee”, he’d whispered.

I rub my hand over the rumpled sheets and burrow into their softness, seeking the remnants of his touch, his scent. I still feel his soft mouth and a tenderness in my scalp. He’d pulled my hair as he sleepily fucked me, a slow slick friction that enticed me from dreams with a gentle throbbing orgasm. Mornings like this make me glad there’s no mail on Sundays.

Entry round 1: #7 The Letter by Sienna Walker


79) Prima Voluptas

Number seven. The buyer paused as her dark eyes traveled down his physique. He held her gaze when it rose again. Her fingers retraced the path; he failed to flinch, even when she tested the size and heft of his manhood. She smirked, gave an amused breath, and moved on.

He was brought to the villa, where they washed and groomed him. But he wasn’t allowed to put his rough-spun tunic back on. The buyer awaited him reclining on a couch, that same smirk on her full red lips. He felt her lustful gaze linger on his naked body. It was obvious what she bought him for.
“Leave us.” she said to the slaves who had delivered her newest purchase. Then her eyes were back on him. “Come.”
He obeyed, approaching the couch. She spread her legs wide, presenting her carefully depilated cunt.
“Please your domina.”
His cock rose to the occasion almost instantly. He never thought twice as he plunged into the enticing womanhood offered before him.

Entry round 1: #101 Auction Block by T.C. Dale


80) She’s Perfect

I kneel, naked and obedient, eyes to the floor while fancy men’s shoes shuffle by, voices low and taunting. Wet. Ready. Slut.

Delicate ankles atop wine suede heels fill my limited view. My chin slowly rises, recalcitrant. Shameful wide eyes meet hers, teasing and enticing. My cunt flutters.

A gloved hand gently touches my face. She helps me up, and I stumble, my legs weakened by kneeling as much as her touch. I turn, and she forces me to bend over a black leather stool, my wet cunt exposed to the air and the eyes of the others.

Without warning, she slaps my ass with the paddle concealed at her waist. I cry out as the crack reverberates around the room, echoing in my head. Three more sharp strikes land on my ass and exposed lips in quick succession. I taste blood as I bite my lip to prevent any further sound from escaping.

“She’s perfect!” she declares, pulls me up by the hair, takes my hand, and leads me from the room.

Entry round 1: #20 The Offering by bluesubmission


81) Straight Shooter

No bells, no trumpets. Only a catch of breath and a rush of blood, hers and his, as he tips an imaginary hat and strolls closer. She’s wearing her best smile; he, his favourite shirt. Pictures have done proper justice to neither.
The winged cherub smirks, and carefully takes aim.

He always aims for the butt. A soft place for the magic to infuse and a shortcut to the place that really matters. The place where those tingles start, where blood races and flesh swells. Flesh that then craves to fuse in a hot, wet frenzy.

The first arrow releases, and hits home. Eros fist pumps, and fires again.

Now the best bit. Watching a match he’s made turn like into lust. His cock twitches.

They exchange slightly awkward greetings and take seats at a table. Physical yearning now pulses between them. He can almost touch it. He touches himself.

Hands meet under the table, then fingers slide under her skirt. Another catch of breath. A trickle of desire. A hardening.

Job done.

Entry round 1: #84 OK, Cupid by Zebra Rose


82) The Forces Sweetheart

It was a bit of business in the blackout. She unbuttoned my flies and I breathed in her perfume as we manoeuvred blindly in the alley. Then the sudden white flash of an incendiary bomb, freeze-framed us, and we saw the sad desperation inhabiting our tired eyes.

I’d developed a taste for it; that was the trouble.
If he hadn’t been first, it would have been someone else.
There’s always someone.
The house across the way throbs with masculine life; you can almost hear it. Smell it.
There’s a bench across the way.
At night I sit there, waiting for someone.

They’re surprised when my hand slithers along their thigh.
They call me lively.
I don’t remember faces but I remember the feel of every prick, gliding along my tongue; or pulsing deep in my cunt.
I’m not how they thought English girls would be.

They slip chocolate or cigarettes into my coat pocket when they’re done; and when they leave, I sit there, waiting for someone else.
There’s always someone else.

Entry round 1: #68 Knee-trembler by Cousin Pons


83) Realized anticipation

The final wisp of lingerie fell, her cunt wet from the thrill of revealing herself. His eyes remained on hers. This, his first sight of her submission. This, the first time she’d seen the true Him; a man desirous of more than her nudity.

A sudden grasping of her hair set the pace as a wicked grin crossed his face. Her mind was racing as her body was bracing, all those taunts and teasing messages she was about to pay for. His hands slithering along her flesh while his mind was pacing the evening’s frivolities. The wall fixture stark and protruding, the rope hanging from it sent a shiver up her spine and made her quiver wondering how far he would take the events of the night. The sharp strikes of the metronome he put into motion set the rhythm as he took off his belt and slowly stroked her buttock. Soft flesh under his hand trembling with anticipation.

Entry round 1: #2 Naked Epiphany by LoveLustLondon


84) Art Lover

The robe slides from her shoulders, a slow reveal of a ripe, lived-in body. Rounded, soft. A body she’s sharing with me. With us. Like Goya’s ‘Naked Maja’, she reclines on plump cushions. Smiling. Watching. I smile back and lift my charcoal to the paper on my easel.

Stroke by yearning stroke, I compose her on the white plane. The soft scratching of charcoal on paper teeth is like a moan. My breathing matches hers. My arm instinctually tracing the crest of her hip, the curve of her thigh, the dip of her cunt. I’ve stopped looking at my drawing; her body commands my gaze. When she arches off the cushion my cock swells, and ebbs when she settles back into the pose.

Later and alone, I recall her form in worship. Flame-haired, ripe and irresistible. She beckons. I paint all night. Canvas after canvas, my brushwork growing more frenetic as the hours pass and her vision consumes me. My head lolls in ecstasy as I howl her name with my release…”Fiona!”

Entry round 1: #6 Drawing Room by Andra Ashe


85) Classical Training

Emma let Steve’s cock slip from her mouth and scanned the room. Heat rose from the mass of bodies joined together like Tetris pieces on the warehouse floor. A tall, loose-limbed man padded over, erection bobbing in front of him. His shy grin cut through her.

She nodded once. Yes.

Gordon circled a finger in the air, which Emma took to mean a pirouette. Raised up on one toe, her lithe naked body spun, petite breasts firm. His eyes consumed her. He confidently strode close to demonstrate, crystalline dewdrop desire glistening on his cock.

Dancer’s muscles, she thought, and though the warehouse was heaped to groaning with writhing bodies, this moment was private.

Gordon clasped her around the waist, inverting her in one smooth motion. Despite their standing height difference, his waist appeared in her eye-line. He buried his face, feverishly lapping her pulsing wetness. She rhythmically sucked most of his erect length into her mouth, and, gripping him tightly upside-down, Emma refused to succumb to the head-rush until their mutual release.

Entry round 1: #86 Tasting Menu by Exhibit A


86) Broken by looks

Her face flushed when she met his smiling gaze across the office. Her breath caught, just as it does every morning when she first sees him. She felt a rush, lightheaded, her whole body aflutter and alive with sensations she didn’t fully understand.

However, she did know why.

However, He was gorgeous. Six foot three with shoulder-length hair and a body to die for. When he spoke, she felt like she was being whisked up by royalty. Accents were always her weak spot, ever since she could remember.

And somehow, even though they never spoke to each other, he knew her thoughts. How he knew it, she didn’t know. However, it was evident by a slight sigh escaping her lips whenever he appeared. Perhaps that’s why he purposely kept silent all this time.

But one day, that silence was broken.

She was sitting as usual in her seat when the electricity had gone out.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

“I’m fine, now that you’re here.”

Entry round 1: #15 Office Crush by Stella Kiink


87) Eulogy Reverie

This was the wrong place for arousal.
My mentor’s casket commanded everyone’s attention but my own. I was transfixed by his daughter as she approached the bier. The modest, black attire hugged her figure and I couldn’t ignore her body’s movements.
Her eyes found mine. I swallowed and she spoke.

Her voice was deep, gravelly, emotional.

I closed my eyes and her voice whispered, blowing softly in my ear. I lost the words as her hands squeezed my shoulders from behind, then traced around and down to the bulge forming. My cock twitched and she let out a deep chuckle before continuing her throaty whisper. She lowered my zipper slowly and took me into her mouth.

With a shake of my head, I brought myself back to reality, to this somber affair. Her eulogy finished; the mourners left, but I couldn’t move.

Our eyes locked as she drew closer. She broke my gaze and slid hers down my form.

A smirk. A tilt of the head. An invitation.

Entry round 1: #76 The Funeral by Jordan Monroe


88) Pride and Avarice

She’s kneeling, naked from the waist down, blindfolded, gagged, a sign on her chest saying ‘Grope me’: a captivating mix of vulnerability and power. As he slips his fingers knuckle- deep inside someone else’s property he lifts the blindfold. Her blue eyes meet his, alive with surprise and welcome.

A whimper leaks from around her gag as his fingers slide against her clit. He is just the copy boy, worth less to her than the gum on the bottom of her Manolo Blahniks, but it doesn’t matter, now. How he covets her success, her power. How he longs to have what she has.

Her husband leans against the wall behind her, a cigarette pinched between his fingers, half hidden in a cloud of smoke. Black onyx eyes cut through the dimness, looking at him, not at her. He removes his fingers and stands, leaving her quivering, and steps through the smoke. Close enough to feel the heat of his arousal, he presses slick fingers against her husband’s lips. They part. His cock throbs.

Entry round 1: #62 On loan by Joy Asitflies


32 comments

  1. This is my first time leaving feed back, and I feel supremely unqualified to give feedback so please do take what I say with a pinch of salt.

    know there is some debate about whether or not it is okay for a sentence to start with a conjunction, for me it’s jarring and puts me of the the story. A couple of writers did this, but in particular 86) Broken by looks.

    I am a bit unclear on the rules regarding poetry and proses but 82) The Forces Sweetheart was more poetry – prose than story.

    I partially enjoy 29) Like her father which manage to continue the previous story in the same “voice”, I found the word carding somewhat jarring but loved this story for how real and sexually charged it felt.

    20) All For Naught was superb I really enjoyed the set up of how important sitting still and then contrasting that with the artist pleasure in the model moving.

    7) The First Timer made me laugh with the last line, the build up of tension and the realise of it was great.

  2. Ones I liked and why:
    20) All For Naught
    I loved the imagery of this piece.
    39)Sweet Jane
    Interesting world to learn more about.
    27) Body over mind
    Relatable.

    Ones with one tiny thing I would have changed, but are otherwise great:
    41) Who is watching?
    I liked the idea, but some of the wording left me confused.
    45) Made to Watch
    Cucks are so hot right now, but I wish the stranger left the blindfold on.
    10) Unlocked fantasies
    Merely personal preference, but ‘Jeb’ makes me think of the Bushes, and not in a good way. I did, however, enjoy the idea of the story.

    Keep writing!

  3. Very excited to give feedback to my fellow Marathoners – and this was a treasure trove of smuttiness! Let’s dive in:
    1. Good – One typo. I’d also suggest minimizing the filter words (felt, for example) for deeper POV.
    2. The hunger is palpable in this story. Final sentence ran on a bit for my liking, but an overall solid tale.
    3. I love the line ‘Her gifts were not designed for comfort.’ Less adverbs and filter words, more phrases like that line. Wonderful!
    4. LOL! That last line makes me want to read more. Love it!
    5. I like a story where a woman’s in charge. Good pacing and a little funny at the end.
    6. I wanted to get into this tale but the choppy sentence fragments and punctuation lapses distracted me.
    7. Such a strange little story but it made me smile. Then I thought of Stifler from the American Pie movies and I cackled a little. Entertaining!
    8. Great transition between the two stories but the sex was glossed over. I wanted more here.
    9. Oh, I like this one. Great twist! Yes, yes, yes!
    10. Liked this one but the key is only mentioned again at the end. In the original story, the key was in her grasp so I would have liked to seen some mention of the key again before the end.
    11. Pretty good. I sensed the urgency once the unexpected driver showed up. Good job.
    12. Not my subgenre of choice, but I like the idea of rape revenge.
    13. Orgy stories are fun. A sentence about the surrounding bodies would have given this tale an extra punch.
    14. Two hot chicks at a rock concert? Yes please! I would have liked more than a kiss but this is a good start to something larger.
    15. ‘…but Lorena was dying to see was going to go bottomless on stage.’ = not sure what that was supposed to say but I couldn’t get past that.
    16. Oooh, there’s a lot going on here and the author does a great job of giving everyone a job in this tale. Good stuff!
    17. Okay, this didn’t go where I thought it was going to go. I like the twist – could have been a little sexier but it’s a good start for something bigger.
    18. Cute premise but the fragmented sentences threw me off.
    19. The last line of dialogue didn’t make sense to me but the rest of the tale was solid. Good voice, especially.
    20. I like this one – the fusion of art and passion is done very well. Good work!
    21. The story started in the woman’s POV and the entry was in the man’s POV. Not sure if that was intentional or not, but I like the change.
    22. Usually not a fan of head hopping POV but it works here. Great twist at the end.
    23. I like this one! ‘His strongest tell’ = great wording!
    24. Too much POV head hopping. I’ve mentioned that it’s worked for other Round 2 stories but it falls short here.
    25. Tension, tension, tension. Yummy – great read!
    26. Good starting point for a larger story and yes, I want some Tetris block leggings now.
    27. Great transition from the original story. A little more punch of tension would’ve worked but overall, good read.
    28. I dig this one, but would’ve liked to see some reciprocity in the sexual tension from the daughter.
    29. Love the transition into the narrator’s imagination. Daydreaming at a funeral – that’s a story!
    30. This is a fun romp. The mutual flirtation is good tension. I like it!
    31. Good voyeur story but I could have used a sentence or two about setting, sounds especially.
    32. An unexpected ending for this teasing story. Good stuff!
    33. Not seeing the connection between the original story and the new entry.
    34. Um…what happened to the girl spread across his lap in the original story?
    35. This started off well but we ended up in a flashback. I feel cheated!
    36. First 2 sentences are repetitive of what’s already mentioned in the original story. Great setting and use of senses.
    37. This was inventive. The addition of the father in the scene perked me up a bit. Good work!
    38. I love this but the last line of dialogue should have happened before he walked out.
    39. Love these stories that seamlessly transition between daydream and reality. Yes, yes, yes! Great work!
    40. The continuation of the original story should have started with the dialogue. Didn’t need the background on the dom at the beginning. Starting with dialogue would have pulled me in more.
    41. A few sentence fragments here and there but pretty good.
    42. Oh, okay! LOL! Another unexpected twist. Not bad.
    43. Good hunger in the story. Great use of tension.
    44. Straight and to the point. Nice work.
    45. I was waiting for a good cuckold story and this fit the bill. Good work!
    46. POV switch from the original story made for less tension for me as a reader.
    47. I like a woman with a plan. This made me want to read more – good work!
    48. Alien sex isn’t really my thing but this was a good foreplay tale.
    49. This tale was mildly amusing and tension was building right at the end.
    50. Voyeur stories aren’t easy to write but this author did a great job with tension and setting.
    51. Sexy and titillating. I like it!
    52. This is the best continuation of Losing Myself I’ve seen thus far. Good work in holding on to the tension of the original story.
    53. Save a few punctuation errors and misspellings, the buildup of anticipation in this tale is great.
    54. Leaving off the second mention of licking her lips could have given the writer more words to tension. There’s good stuff here – I like it.
    55. I liked this a lot but where the hell is she going? The ending could have been interpreted as an invitation for the man to follow. Good stuff, nonetheless.
    56. This tricky flashbacks! Taking the reader three weeks backwards stopped this story from moving forward.
    57. Good twist on the original story. I like it!
    58. This is the opening of an erotic novel, for sure. I especially love ‘There were few things as intoxicating as being the recipient of a crush.’ Facts!
    59. Andra Ashe’s Drawing Room is such a great prompt for a larger story so I’m happy to see several Marathoners taking this on. This reiteration shows the struggle between art and lust. Great job!
    60. Even more tease here – I like it!
    61. ‘A lover coming to life on paper’ = Yes please.
    62. It’s like CSI meets erotica. I like what the writer was going for here.
    63. Oh my! Love the twist and setting is on point!
    64. Great transition from the original story. Could have used a bit more setting of the bar area.
    65. Was a little lost in the beginning but the writer brought me back toward the end.
    66. SO disrespectful but sexy as fuck! LOL! I liked it.
    67. Yes, yes, yes! The want in this tale absolutely pulled me in!
    68. What happened to her fangs? That would have created a stronger continuation of the original story.
    69. Not seeing a connection between the original story and the new one.
    70. Good stuff here! Mutual want and a power struggle to boot!
    71. Nice twist with the boss but a little punctuation wouldn’t hurt this piece.
    72. This was fun and sexy. Gina & Alice don’t touch and the passion still pulsates. Good work.
    73. Again – what happened to the damn key???
    74. Perfect title, because WHOA! This was good.
    75. Good interpretation of the original story. A good mix of emotions and lust.
    76. Turning into a story onset was creative. Good stuff.
    77. Interesting take on this original story. Anything that calls power dynamics into play is a great story.
    78. Oh, now the husband/wife trope is a sweet and sexy take on the original story. Great interpretation!
    79. ‘Please your domina’ is one of the best lines of dialogue from this round.
    80. The quickest sub interview ever. I liked this!
    81. Eros participating in erotic matchmaking – very inventive!
    82. I appreciate the poetic structure of this entry.
    83. I don’t know how the addition of a metronome in the scene is so effective, but damn this works. Great tension and setting.
    84. This prompt is so good for combining art and lust and this story is another example of a fine use of these themes. Great job!
    85. Best use of describing bodies I’ve seen in Round 2 so far. Good work!
    86. One of those Howevers should be deleted.
    87. Another good example of the reality/daydream transition.
    88. I love love love the title!

    In the end, I chose #45, #51, & #67. Good luck to everyone!

  4. I particularly enjoyed the different creative ways “the funeral” was interpreted. I think the hardest part of this assignment was carrying the story on in the spirit it originated. The stories that changed perspective and added names where there weren’t any before created a bit of a mental disconnect for me. My favorite piece was #16 Spit and Polish. So hot and beautifully written. The “peeled tip” description induced especially delightful memories of my own.

  5. My 3 Picks:
    #1 – Love the description of the spanking and feelings associated with it. Kept going back to it.

    #6 – Love a good twist! Thinking it will go one way and it goes another. Vampire stories! 🙂

    #19 – Love a good scene! So much fun.

    Others: What I liked about them…
    #20 – Love the teasing and snapping of the charcoal because of it.
    #34 – Great turn of events. She ended up with something she likes, at least if you go by the smile 😉
    #42 – Was similar to #6 yet a bit opposite. Liked it a lot too
    #78 – Cute how the past came into the present from the choice made
    #80 – Love the scene, proving she is worthy and can handle what is given in limits

  6. Well, what a wonderfully naughty bunch we all are! I loved this challenge, it was such a lot of fun to see how the initial stories developed and were interpreted. I was lucky enough to have four of you develop my initial story and I loved them all, so very different, so imaginative, so horny! My initial shortlist was so long I didn’t think I’d ever narrow it down to just three – I’d never vote for my own story, that seems wrong to me somehow! – But I’m a sucker for a twist, especially in a short story, so that’s where my votes were to go in the final countdown. If I were to vote tomorrow I’d probably choose a different three! But three it had to be…

    Firstly, I’m going to comment on all four of the entries that used my story as the basis for the writers own imaginings. I wish I could comment on all the stories I especially enjoyed, but time is against me. I have made comments on a few however.

    9) The Internet Stranger
    This one really took the last line from the original story and added a delicious twist at the end that I really enjoyed, the instruction to play was wonderfully naughty, the scene developed beautifully, creating the sexual tension that the last para bought to a different level.

    51) Bless Me
    Another excellent twist on my original offering. Maybe this one appealed to be on a subliminal level too, as I was taught by nuns at an early age (not by a Sister Mary though) and my Catholic guilt added a further edge? But essentially I just thought the re-imagining of the initial scenario was both original and very horny (I laugh in the face of Catholic guilt, but might say a quick Hail Mary, just to be on the safe side)

    57) Yours, Sir
    This one developed the anticipation nicely, I like that the whip was dropped heavily to the floor rather than simply used straightaway, the physical response from the blindfolded sub was horny “pristine canvas of your back” is a delicious phrase…
    60) Entrapment
    Because I wrote this original not giving a clue as to who was in the room and who was soon to arrive, I liked that this version interpreted it this way round. The power play running throughout was wonderfully mischievous. I had a very naughty Goth girlfriend once upon a time, so that element added an extra personal connection, albeit one the writer couldn’t have known about (… or could he/she :). The writing on this one is very accomplished, some lovely turns of phrase and imagery is effortlessly conjured up… the fragrance sprayed to pulse points, the use of the word ‘bewitching’, the invitation that would not be refused – a lot is packed in to so few words. And of course the ‘fattest dildo’ certainly brings to life the last line of the original in a wonderfully naughty way.

    71) You surprised me
    I loved this one, again the twist of the reveal as being her boss was delicious, I’m not a fan of a smirk in erotica usually, it can often be overused I find, too much of a cliché for my tastes, but here the smirk was well judged given what he now told her he’d just witnessed, their working relationship changed forever…
    82) The Forces Sweetheart
    This really took the original story and added to it I felt, taking the ‘sad desperation’ line from the original was a powerful way for this story to really develop, some lovely writing (apart from the repeat of ‘across the way’ which jarred a little for me personally) and the theme of sadness and desperation on an individual level, of doing what needed to be done in order to survive was carried throughout well I thought.
    13) Game Change
    I’m a sucker for an orgy in erotica (so to speak) so this one caught my imagination straight away, it was also one of my favourite stories from round 1 and one that I’d also worked on for round 2 (although not submitted in the end). I liked the detachment in this one, the cursory look around the room for her (maybe) partner before being fingered in a way that instantly made her forget about him.

  7. Enjoyed reading every single entry. What a talented bunch! Some feedback below:

    7) The First Timer: This was the funniest punchline I’ve read in a very long time. Thank you for the laughs!

    8) The upgrade: What a clever twist, I really enjoyed this. “The vibrant green of the atmospheric haze from level 245 backlit Seven” didn’t read quite right for me – think it may have worked better if it had been “atmospheric haze on level 245”. Didn’t in any way spoil a great story though.

    9) The Internet Stranger:,Oh wow, superb twist with a scorching hot build up. Not sure the first comma in the second sentence was necessary, but only a minor point in a very clever piece of writing.

    13) Game Change: Enjoyed how you inserted another storyline into yours (now I want to know Emma and Adam’s relationship!), and how you skilfully continued a very hot scenario.

    16) Spit and Polish: Wow, such gloriously visceral descriptions. Delicious, great job! Not sure if “arse” is recognised internationally though – perhaps a non-Brit can help me out?

    20) All For Naught: Think this needed a comma between “while I work” and “for the smallest shift”. You’ve managed to progress this story in a wonderfully sexy way, excellent stuff!

    23) Late Charge: This is masterful! I’m mightily impressed at how you’ve given such depth to two characters in these few words, as well as compose a very sexy situation from the excellent original story.

    31) Perfect Pair: Incredibly sexy continuation, very well done! So well written that I can easily picture the scene. I may be wrong, but should “the woman who’s eyes” be “the woman whose eyes”?

    34) Even Better: Quite an achievement to continue the blisteringly hot sexiness of the original – congratulations! I’ve already re-read this three times and it gets better with each read.

    36) For the Tribe: Wow, such a splendid fantasy. I really liked the original and so I’m delighted that it has been confined in a really captivating and sexy way. Your descriptions of the oil, the sounds and the scents skilfully brought it to life. My only problem was that I don’t find the name ‘Derek’ to be in any way sexy!

    45) Made to Watch: A really sweet ending and I liked how you managed to succinctly suggest the uncertainty of the husband.

    49) Inner Monologue Failure: An ingenious way to continue the (already excellent) story – brilliant! Clever repetition of “Fuck me” too. I wonder if the lack of contractions on “He is”, “do not” and “That is” was deliberate, so as to support the idea that this person is foreign?

    50) The Kinetoscope: Well this really hit me in the feels, what a skilled writer you are! The best stories stay with you for long after you’ve read them and this will certainly stay with me. I didn’t realise that facedown could be one word either!

    66) Pushing Up Daisy: Gloriously filthy, wrong but oh so right – wonderfully humorous title too. “I paid my respects to her cunt” – love it!

    83) Realized anticipation: Thank you for choosing my story, I really like what you’ve done with it! A wonderfully intense pace, a tantalising glimpse at a back story and a hint of horror…perfect.

    85) Classical Training: So. Damn. Hot. I do enjoy a story which isn’t afraid to quickly get to the sexy, physical stuff but still expertly manages to thread in poetic descriptions such as “crystalline dewdrop desire”.

  8. Right, let’s try this again after my first comments got eaten! There’s a reason I don’t do reviews on my blog, it’s because I am really bad at articulating opinion in that way. I have tried my best, and divided into the mostly positive, and then my 3 least faves at the bottom.

    29) Like Her Father – I want to read the rest of this story so much. Please write the rest of this story!
    (THis one was my favourite)

    12) Temple Mount – This was beautifully written, but the use of ‘rape’ was really jarring and took me out of the story.
    14) Rock Show – ‘clutching fiercely to yours, our grip intensified by the fear we’ll be swept apart’ is just a gorgeous line
    33) An Unexpected Consequence – The description of the kiss on the hand is just beautiful.
    50) The Kinetoscope – Really great premise but too many things kept drawing me out (particularly ‘penny dreadful’ which felt very anachronistic), which was a pity as the writing was so good.
    58) Inspiring Desperation – Really liked the premise, we’ve all hoped that our crush is thinking this of us!
    81) Straight Shooter I love how this is a complete story in itself, and nothing is rushed, it’s paced really nicely.
    84) Art Lover – The notion of filling pages and pages with her, I really really like.

    15) Backstage Fright – There was a lot of repetition of the characters’ names – it can be really hard when there are two people of the same gender involved but some of them could definitely have been trimmed as they kept taking me out of the story.
    35) Successful Shopping – I didn’t enjoy reading this, from the unpleasant description of the cashier as ‘sissy boy’, to the over-description of the lingerie.
    74) That escalated quickly – Lived up to it’s title, but in the process felt far too rushed and confused.

  9. I really liked the stories that had an unexpected twist, that were more than just a continuation of events in the inspiration story.

    2. I love the reptilian description of the male character. You painted him as a true predator. I did not like how the story went from 1st person to 3rd person, it interrupted the flow.

    6. This story had me hooked right away. The twist at the end was comedic and sexy. I love a strong female character, and I always enjoy it when good triumphs over evil.

    16. This story got one of my votes because it is exactly the kind of smut I like. A threesome, the teasing of future hot gay sex, sexy dirty talk. I loved the description of a hard cock as “a glass tusk sleeved in warm velvet”. I also liked that it took the original story and turned it from a potentially dark story to a one where everyone gets what they want. I like happy endings!

    23. I like how the writer took this from a stranger in a bar story and gave the characters a connection and a back story that left me wanting to know what happens next.

    31. I loved this story! I can feel the heat between the couple and I so want the main character to join in.

    37. This story did not go to an expected place, and I really like that. It makes you wonder what else happened, what exactly is she going to replay in her mind over and over?

    41. I really like reading smut about sexual acts in public, but what I liked most about this story was how the writer made the original story into a movie being watched by the characters in the continuation story. That was a very clever way to set a new sexy scene.

    45. This is dirty and sexy. I can relate to being turned on by a fantasy that you absolutely do not want in reality. I like how the husband and wife seem to have such a deep connection, down to their simultaneous orgasm.

    49. I would love to find out what happens next in this story!

    75. I voted for this story because it was a beautiful extension of the original story. They both paint such a sad and desperate picture, and while not particularly erotic for me, it definitely stirs emotion.

    77. I love the strong female character in this story. She not only gets what she wants, but she enjoys the process. I especially enjoyed the last line. Yes, please, I would!

    79. Consent is an issue for me with this story. I feel like it at least needs to be implied, and I don’t get that vibe here. I love a good sex slave story, but I need to feel like the slave has submitted willingly, not by force.

  10. Again, I want to leave some general feedback for why several of these stories didn’t work for me,

    First (and I admit it is a particular obsession of mine), grammatical errors. If you can’t get someone to read your work and point out where you have misspelled or misused words, at least run a spell-check over your story! That will catch the obvious (cubicle, restaurateur) even if it misses homophones (threw/through, who’s/whose) and mistakes of usage (honed/homed).
    Some stories had more serious problems with punctuation; writers didn’t seem to know how or why to use commas and colons, and in a couple of cases even struggled to correctly mark or punctuate direct speech. All these things, when done properly, help your reader slip into your scene.

    There were also issues with sentence structure in several cases, where run-on sentences, non-sequitur, abrupt shifts in tense or POV all jarred me out of the story. You want your reader to go back and re-read a sentence because it is just that good, not because they didn’t get it first time around!

    Then we come to the substance of the story. While I don’t think that any particular topic should be off-limits for erotic fiction, I do believe that authors have a responsibility to handle sensitive or controversial topics with delicacy and tact. I was disappointed to see stories about non-consensual slavery approached entirely from the (female) owners’ POV. I was equally disappointed by the creepy and somewhat obsessive thoughts of an outwardly helpful character, which went unchallenged. Perhaps most concerning was an attempt to depict D/s relationships where the author appears to view such dynamics as inherently bad for the submissive partner, and even has a character previously in a committed D/s relationship revel in their independence. This seems so unlike the usual attitude within the BDSM community that I wonder whether the author should really be attempting to write D/s fiction.

    The last thing that put me off a few quite interesting stories was that the writers appeared not to have read (or liked!) the entry they were continuing from.

  11. 12) I absolutely adore Temple Mount. It picks a direction from the original story and moves it in such a triumphant direction. So good.

    22) Feeding Time confused the h*ck out of me. Changing perspectives in a story this short is risky business and I don’t think it was well achieved here.

    35) Successful Shopping is a shopping list, not a story. There’s a hint of background for Emma, but mostly it’s just a list of what she’s wearing. Fine in a larger piece, but I think it falls flat here.

    75) Wartime Lament is the opposite of arousing for me, and I think it’s intended that way. It achieves the sadness and loneliness of war and survival while still being about sex. It’s beautiful and haunting and horrifying. Well done.

    EXCELLENT WORK WRITERS!

  12. So hard to decide! So many great stories!

    Many of the ones I did not pick were ones that did not continue the story with the same voice or tone, or some that even repeated “info” from the first story. I felt like there were many where the continuation was not smooth. (This is a challenge, obviously, which is why this is an assignment right?)

    A few I especially enjoyed:
    17- I liked that it is all dialog and very quick paced
    23-Good continuation and sexy without being overboard, it fit the tone of the story overall
    25- Also good continuation and I liked the anticipaito
    32- I liked the “twist”
    39- I liked the fantasy with the knowledge that she figured it out
    59- I liked the defiance

  13. Great job all! I was going to try to leave feedback for everyone, but I just didn’t know what to say for some and found some of my feedback redundant. But here it is:
    Round 2
    1. A Cathartic Release – I really like that you have the MC go from observer to the one receiving the spankings, but I think the transition “you’re next” was a little redundant following so closely behind the “I was next” from the original piece.
    2. Cafe Anthropophagos – The switch in perspective really took me out of the story, which is a shame, as I liked where it was going!
    3. The Dance – Very sensual. I thought you continued the original story flawlessly! Great job!
    4. Falling Hard – HA! While I completely disagree with the final statement, I liked this. I think it captures a first meeting after online flirting very well. (Maybe you meant that Die Hard is THE BEST Christmas movie??)
    6. Perfect Camouflage – OMG I loved this! I love the twist that you start with, him being the real vampire, and then the twist at the end with her being the hunter… fabulous! Well done!
    7. The First Timer – HAHA! Great twist at the end! Loved it!
    8. The upgrade – I enjoyed this, but would have liked to see the actual fucking! I also thought the transition into your piece was a little clumsy.
    9. The Internet Stranger – Your second sentence was too complex. I had to read it through a few times to really get the imagery. And I got a little confused in the end, as it seems that the perspective shifts, but then you realize that her husband is also there?
    10. Unlocked Fantasies – HOT! Good imagery!
    11. Filthy Silhouettes – Very hot! I love this, but I don’t know if you realized that you switched the tense. It was present in the original and you switched it to past.
    12. Temple Mount – I really like what you did with this! One small note – I think the “she” in the last sentence would be better as “Medusa”. I was a little confused until I read the title of the round 1 piece.
    13. Game Change – I like the title. You flawlessly continued the previously story. Well done!
    14. Rock Show – First of all, I’m so flattered you chose to continue my original story! Made me super happy and I liked what you did with it! Very good imagery.
    15. Backstage Fright – Are they watching Equus? I liked this, but another read-through may have picked up some of the errors.
    16. Spit and Polish – Ok, I love this. So sensual and organic. Lovely diction, too!
    19. Do You Dare? – Are they married? That’s the impression I get in the end, but I’m not quite sure.
    20. All For Naught – I don’t know if that was “all for naught” 😉
    25. Drinking Game – I really like the image of her smile brightening her face at the same time as her eyes darken with desire.
    27. Body Over Mind – I really liked this. It was a smooth continuation of the original story and felt like it could’ve all been written by the same person.
    33. An Unexpected Consequence – Is the consequence that she learns more about herself? Be careful with tenses. You switch from the past of the original story to present in yours.
    36. For the Tribe – I like where you took this, but you should have started with “She smiled and his world went dark.” Everything before that is redundant from the original story.
    39. Office Daydream – Liked this a lot! Flawless transition between the original story and your own! Great job!
    45. Made to Watch – Oh I like the cuck situation. Very nicely done!
    52. Incomplete Contrition – Ha! This seemed genuine. Flawless transition and you stayed perfectly inside her head. Loved it!
    58. Inspiring Desperation – I like how you turned this to his perspective and made him a little snaky. Very unique.
    60. Entrapment – I want more! What happens after this??
    65. Made for me – Beautifully written. Great diction.
    69. The Assignment – I love how you turned this into a completely different story. Well done!
    73. A Caged Anointing – Two guys – fantastic and unexpected!
    74. That Escalated Quickly – I like where you took this. Be careful with tenses. You continued the original story’s present tense and then switched to past.
    78. The Mailman’s Wife – Oh I liked this! Very sensual.

  14. Well that was a difficult choice! My initial shortlist was over a dozen entries.
    Some entries don’t meet the requirements on a basic point – title length, so I discounted those. Read the instructions, then read them again. Measure twice, cut once as my Dad always says.
    I would like to give one very simple piece of advice for future rounds: Read your entry before you submit it. Read what you have written, not what you THINK you have written. Read it out loud. You’ll be amazed how many simple issues are highlighted by doing this.

  15. Apologies for length.
    One thing a huge collection does is show you what words, and techniques are overused. For example: there were more than 15 smirks sprinkled through the stories. About 80% of the adverbs and ~50% of the adjectives many stories could have been removed to improve the overall. Passive voice often steals the momentum of the action. (I’m often guilty of most of these things in my own writing – it’s just easier to see in someone else’s)
    Several stories essentially ignored the cues from the seeds they used and went off in completely different directions with no connection. In others, the POV switched or tense of the action introduced a disconnect to the flow. Sometimes those can work, but most of the time, not.

    2) Café Anthropophagos – Highlight: Has a nice taste of erotic horror. Notes: Switching POV 1st to 3rd, and tense from present to past cuts the story seed off from its continuation. Why is light in a walk-in freezer flickering? Adverb overload.
    3) The Dance – Highlight: The tightrope analogy. Notes: Nearly all the adverbs could be removed to improve the story.
    5) The Birds – I have to say I didn’t like this one at first. But on second read, the POV grew on me quite a bit. For me it held delayed nuance.
    6) Perfect Camouflage – Both well written and clever. Extra points for a well executed triple reversal in such a tiny space.
    7) The First Timer – Highlight: Erotic surreality works for me. Funny and weird.
    8) The upgrade – Notes: The eroticism is missing. The sexuality feels perfunctory or out of place.
    9) The Internet Stranger – Notes: Switch of POV 2nd to 3rd cuts off the seed. Scents pervade an area – like ;the air’, not a body part. The action needed more or sharper words to be conveyed clearly. Adverb overload.
    10) Unlocked Fantasies – Highlight: A couple nice surprises in this one. Notes: Jeb is named later, doesn’t need “my husband , Jeb”. “Hubby” is out of place for the mood.
    11) Filthy Silhouettes – Highlight: The scene concept and visual of the passing voyeur was neat. Notes: Tesnse switch: present to past. Unnecessary adverbs: Hurriedly; Passive voice “were creating” steals the key moment.
    12) Temple Mount – Hits: Very clever. Nice scene and story. Excellent use of a literal interpretation. Notes: Flicking on the lights doesn’t evoke an ancient temple. You have to ignore the modern language to buy the story. Unnecessary Adjectives. ‘charge’ doesn’t seem like the right word.
    14) Rock Show – Highlights: The energy is great. The words convey it well. Notes: The word choice doesn’t always flow for me. Examples: Flesh instead of skin; pelvis in instead of just ‘grinding against’
    15) Backstage Fright – Cute twist. The situation is almost sweet, with a little perv in it.
    16) Spit and Polish – It’s not my thing, but it reads decadent and atmospheric.
    17) Unconventional Convention – Highlight: Snappy dialog. Started too jargony for me, but became interesting.
    18) Friend as Bonus – Highlight: I liked the plotting aspect at the start. Notes: It felt too easy. What could she say that would get him to so completely ditch his date? The fait accompli isn’t enticing enough.
    19) Do You Dare? – Highlight: The reveal of the fantasy is clever. Notes: It felt too much like a rough sketch of something more involved.
    20) All For Naught – Highlight: The way the writing blurs the description of drawing and touch. Notes: Word choice: Unhinge. Missed opportunity – his reaction as she breaks his cardinal rule could have been a little more mixed.
    22) Feeding Time – Highlight: Vampire Mailman is a novel concept. Notes: This POV shifting doesn’t work in so few words. Novel as it is, the vampire surprise doesn’t work for me. An incongruity: He’s fantasizing of her going down on him, and then he bites her neck?
    23) Late Charge – Makes me want more. Changes the meaning and direction of the original seed, and I really like that.
    26) Smoke and Fire – Highlights: Boots and cats, Lipstick I’d put on to go clubbing. Notes: Promising start. I feel it does’t quite match up with the story seed, visual-wise.
    27) Body over mind – Highlight: ‘Fucking hot’ line – I’m a sucker for this kind of word play, no matter how straightforward. Notes: groin & braless seem like awkward wording; I always get slightly creeped out when genitals get anthropomorphized as ‘he’ or ‘she’.
    28) A Second Chance – Highlight: the whole thing. This worked for me on all levels. Changes the original seed, and makes it correct.
    30) So Very Yes – Highlight: Sexy-plotting by flatmates. Notes: It jumps too fast from nothing to “throbbing with need.” There are a number of settings between Zero and Eleven.
    31) Perfect Pair – This is another one that I liked better on second reading. The Voyeur’s dilemma, and the surreal scene work for me.
    34) Even Better- The simple double surprise makes this enticing.
    35) Successful Shopping – Shifting from the action at the orgy into a detailed description of her outfit and its origin drops the original seed almost completely.
    40) Sweet Jane – Highlight: The air of ritual or sacrament.
    43) Arranged Marriage – Highlight: The steady voice is seamless through the seed to the story. Notes: The story is pure continuation of the original idea with no explanation of the revulsion; we have nothing added.
    44) Life After Death – Highlights: The incongruity of it all, the power over the crowd. Well written. Notes: The command felt too abrupt. Needed some other way of doing it.
    45) Made to Watch – Highlights: The POV switch here works. It conveys the voyeur/cuckold’s emotion. “I must remember this is what I want” is a great expression of doubt at fantasy made real. Note: ‘scrunches’ is not the most erotic verb.
    46) Business Meeting – Highlights: Nice visuals. Notes: Whys and Hows of this tryst seem to have skipped steps. Rapid POV switch in such a small space is hard to pull off.
    47) Special Delivery – Highlight: Strong visuals. Notes: The reversal doesn’t work. Seed is of someone wanting a hand around their throat, but the continuation is total Femdom. Different story – or a setup for disappointment – the mailman is far too tentative.
    48) My Kalika – Highlights: Made me interested in knowing more. As an SF fan, perfect anatomy matches with odd skin colors are not necessarily alien at all – what is she? Notes: “unfolding her” – missing ‘of’; ‘had stayed put’ is wrong word choice – ‘persisted’, maybe. Use of passive voice diffuses the action. Why is everyone trembling? Her lust seems diffuse.
    50) The Kinetoscope – I get what the writer tried to do, but the the tableau used too many action words for me and over-familiarity – such as names for the dead, when the watchers of the scene have no idea who they are. The POV switch is jarring. The scene itself is macabre, but not really erotic for me.
    51) Bless Me – Highlights: Kinky roleplay scene is interesting. Blasphemy often works. The reveal of the ‘sin’ is also clever. Notes: whimpering out of the gate is too much too soon. How about whispering? His smirk feels out of place, breaking the transgressive atmosphere
    52) Incomplete Contrition – Highlight: Last line. Liked this one a lot; playfully wicked. Had the roles down.
    55) The Sexiest Smile – Highlight: “…like his fingers and not his gaze traced down.” Notes: Smirks are kind of by definition not delicious.”tightened her vaginal walls” is more clinical than erotic, to me.
    57) Yours, Sir – I couldn’t stop thinking about the practicality of a whipping scene in a hotel suite.
    59) Art of Desire – Highlight: The mismatched tactility of “My mind paints the picture of her skin against mine as I create her, drawing a reality of my own.” Notes: POV switch, 1st to 2nd confuses the flow.
    60) Entrapment – Highlight: Another clever reversal. Definite surprises coming.
    62) Killer Climax – Notes: I don’t think her body betrayed her. She did all this very intentionally, and doesn’t rally have any guilt about it. She gets off _because_ he’s a monster. There’s an opportunity to explore that fetish.
    64) Holding Off – I wish my town had a nude bar with dancing.
    67) A Simple Request – This feels like one too many kinks. It lost the moment and direction of the seed story, which presaged whipping and brought it to choking instead.
    69) The Assignment – This was cute, and it works here and now. But it was a gamble. A trick like this worked only because no one else used it this round, and likely won’t work a second time in this marathon.
    71) You surprised me – Dialog really needs quote marks, IMO.
    73) A Caged Anointing – Highlight: Sipping beer and staring. The story isn’t my thing, but it’s well done.
    76) Desire’s Edge – Highlight: Turned a cliche into something very interesting. I didn’t like the seed by itself because I didn’t find it at all erotic. With the new part, it becomes much sharper (pun intended) and transgressive.
    77) Parent Teacher Confidential – Highlight: The situation. A mom essentially whoring herself for her kid’s grades is a different take. Well written to boot.
    78) The Mailman’s Wife – The flash forward is a bold move that mostly works.
    80) She’s Perfect – Highlight: The glee I hear in “She’s perfect!” It makes the relatively standard fetish scene come together.
    81) Straight Shooter – Highlight: I like this Eros as a character. The only real issue here is that the seed story looked like the other characters didn’t really need any help from him.
    85) Classical Training – Quite the acrobatic orgy. It hints that this could be a perverted Cirque do Soleil.

  16. I just went back and reread the feedback from the last round, because I wasn’t sure how to format or write my own. I am a little timid about giving critical feedback, actually, because having once been a new writer, I know how hard it can be to read criticism (and is still, sometimes). A much more experienced writer said to me once, “It stings when someone calls your baby ugly!” Ouch, don’t I know it. So to anyone that is doing this, to all you putting your babies out here, kudos to you! You deserve heaps of praise just for being here, wherever your story falls in the voting.

    I actually learned quite a lot in the first online critique group I belonged to, the first thing being the oreo cookie method of critiquing (ok they called it the sandwich method but I like oreos, so there–) which is to sandwich the negative between two positives when critiquing. Start out with something you like, follow on with the “opportunities for growth,” or ways in which the writing might be made stronger, and wrap up with something encouraging. This, of course, probably works better with longer pieces of writing, but it’s something I try to keep in mind when I am doing a critique. The other thing I learned is that a critique is only one person’s opinion. Read it, think about it, then decide if it rings true to you or not. Don’t obsess about it. Make a change if you feel it’s a valid critique, maybe get a 2nd or 3rd opinion if you don’t think so – and then move on. There are so many more words to write!

    So okay, yeah, that is my “been ’round the critiquing block a time or three” piece of advise. 😉 Now, onto my feedback.

    First of all, the stories I liked the best had certain things in common. They surprised me in some way – they had a twist I hadn’t expected or they took the initial story in a direction I hadn’t considered, without trying too hard for the “surprise!” effect. #78 did that by showing us not the immediate moments after the people meet, but a sweet glimpse into the future. #81 did so by having *Cupid* be the lustful one, rather than just his victims. Another that I really liked was the viewpoint in #58 of the crushee rather than the crusher (am I using those terms right? lol) I enjoyed being in the mind of the person inspiring the crush, and listening to his deliberate manipulations. They also drew me in and made me feel something for the characters. I literally laughed out loud at #7; the line, “I crumble” made me crumble too in #20; my heart ached in #82. I also tended to appreciate stories with more subtle eroticism than blatantly spelling it out – but that was completely my own preference in this instance, and not a judgement on the style at all. I read, enjoy and write a good filthy piece of smut too.

    Things that threw me off in some of the writings: grammar, spelling, punctuation errors. Check, check and double-check. Also, in these particular stories, I expected *some* continuity of story. A twist is good, not following on the pervious story at all left me confused at times. Another thing that left me confused in some of the stories was switching POV’s. It’s hard to do well in a 2500 word story, in 125 words? Even harder. It can be done, #46 is evidence of it done quite skillfully, but in general, it should probably be avoided in such a short piece (exceptions to every rule,YMMV, etc etc.)

    I was really impressed with how much *story* the writers were able to pack into so few words. I mean whole, complete, stories in some of them! And on the other hand, I loved some of them that told of just a moment in time, a moment that meant something to the characters. Whether or not it would be a life-changing something we are left to imagine on our own. #14 was a good example of that.

    All in all, as with the last round, I learned as much from reading other’s writings as I did from writing my own. I am sure I will do so from the feedback as well.

  17. I have to admit it was a difficult job reading through so many short stories. I am only human so may have missed a few of good ones. The stories with original settings and/or added personal details got a re-read from me. I did notice a few typo’s so those entries got thrown out of my top picks. I had 21 on my list to read a third time and that got reduced to 12.

    From the twelve there were two entries that stood out for me. Remember erotica is subjective.

    My favourite is number 51 – Bless Me
    This won’t me a surprise to people who read my own fiction. But apart from the fact she was dressed in a nun’s habit and he was wearing lacy panties the story was original so stood out for me immediately. It is well written and I loved the underlying humour too.
    One improvement for me would be to change this sentence
    – You snake your delectable body into mine. “You know what I need,” you whimper, –
    around slightly as there are too many “yous”.

    My Second favourite is number 45 – Made to Watch
    Again this story tapped into my fantasy world. I really like the insight we are given into his feelings and the love he has for her. We are given a character insight which is great. It makes the tale seem believable.
    A improvement for me would be to cut out one or both of the “that” in the first two lines. Would like to know their names too.

    Others I liked.
    Number 62 – Killer Climax
    Another original entry. This one takes the round 1 entry and switches to the other character. It is very well written with a great end line.
    One thing I’m not sure about is the fact she is watching him through a one way mirror. In the round 1 entry it appears he is at the scene of the crime not being detained. So a bit of a jump there.

    Number 5 – The Birds
    Really appreciate the way this entry is written. It almost has a cleanness to it. It is simply sexy and I like how it ends returning to where it kind of started – him fumbling for his name, now she is asking for his name.
    Saying that I would have liked to have known what she was called, to get away from using “she” so much.

    Number 72 – Food Glorious Food
    I love food so I very much got on board with this original and erotic scenario.
    One thing that didn’t work for me was this sentence – “I followed sat and watched her make love to a cream cake.” – clunky.

    Number 82 –
    Really like some of the imagery in this story. It is easy to visualise and I love stories that paint a picture.
    I am not really sure about the layout of the entry and also I think the double use of the same word in close proximity was done on purpose (“been” and “across” for example), but it didn’t work for me.

    I will be voting for 51, 45 and one of the others I have mentioned above.

    I also liked –
    Numbers 25, 27, 35, 44, 45, 66,and 75

  18. 1. Repetition and grammar issues took me out of it. Felt like omniscient despite being written in first. But this was my favorite original story and you did a great job keeping the smut fires burning.
    2. The POV switch was jarring, but you have an interesting tale here. Looks like the kind of thing that could be expanded into a good horror erotica short.
    3. I would love to see this whole scene play out!
    4. I was hoping for more smut but this was deliciously funny!
    6. Nice balance between horror and erotica.
    7. Bwahahahaha!! I think I heard this joke told differently but I love it.
    8. I’d love to see this movie.
    9. A few words like “drool” weren’t especially erotic to me but I love the twist, and I wonder where it’s going.
    10. Original and steamy. Nice job.
    12. The mention of rape took me out of the mood, but this is lovely writing with a nice build.
    13. I’d love to see the entire scene of this one too!
    14. I love the romantic edge to this one.
    15. The subtlety is fantastic. This sounds like a sultry scene in a larger piece, one I want to read.
    16. Some of the language used takes me out of the moment, like “peel” and “skull”, but the scene is incredible.
    17. Some of the dialogue sounded a little stilted, and I would liked to have seen more action in place.
    18. I would have liked seeing this play out, what she said, for instance.
    19. I would have liked seeing their bathroom tryst up close and personal! But I like all that was implied in their dialogue.
    20. Wonderful stuff. I wondered if this was really happening and no one noticed, or they were alone, or it was in his imagination. The ambiguity made it stand out.
    21. Very nice; love the ending. It makes me want more too! But I wonder what kind of office has showers?
    22. Wow, I didn’t see that ending coming!
    23. Another of my favorites. Nice flow.
    24. I wasn’t sure about the line “Newly single” was not looking very good on her.” Was he interested, or pitying?
    25. Classy!
    26. I got lost on the last line but I love the poetic feel of this one!
    27. I like how we’re focused on the MC throughout for a slow burn. It took me a minute to realize who the sudden third party was.
    29. Oh damn, that’s fucking fantastic. The emotional switch at the end: brilliant.
    30. Sharing is caring! I love the playfulness here, and the boobs on display. Did she overhear their conversation, or was that her impression?
    31. That is lovely. A fantastic literary touch to this one. That is some party.
    32. Good story but oh noooooooooo 🙁 Too bad that went unconsummated. Great job.
    33. Very nice handling of an unusual perspective.
    34. Hey, I smiled at this one too!
    35. Makes me want to go shopping.
    36. Hot details, yet a little bothered by the rape aspect.
    37. Oh that’s filthy. Well done!
    38. Nice tease, that’s a good twist.
    39. Love it, I want them to get together!
    40. Nice weaving of descriptions.
    41. It was a little hard to follow the action but I like the scene you set.
    42. Nice twist!
    43. I dig the conflict of feelings here and the last line was money.
    44. I like the lighthearted tone this one takes; it’s subtle but strong.
    45. Beautifully done; the descriptions are striking.
    46. Feels like another step in a story I want to read. Very nice.
    47. Ha! I like that the uniform is a draw.
    50. I’m sorry, I was a little lost on what was happening, partly due to the changes in tense.
    51. Superbly kinky!
    52. Nice transfer of emotion from spankee to MC!
    53. I can see this one playing out nicely, well done.
    54. Love that wicked sense of humor.
    55. “Vaginal walls” was a bit clinical but otherwise I liked this.
    56. It sounds like there are two men in the picture here, but I had trouble distinguishing which was which. But what a nice birthday present.
    57. Nice to see the man in the submissive position, and the dom could be either.
    58. That’s just fucking lovely writing.
    59. Lovely! I like the transfer of feelings into art.
    60. I like the playful touch brought on by “fattest dildo”.
    61. Watching a sketch come to life instead of actual fingers on skin was a genius way to subvert our expectations.
    62. That I was not expecting. But I loved it! It could have used a chapter break; it took me a while to realize these were different scenes.
    63. Kinda turned off by the shoe-licking but different strokes for different folks. Otherwise this was fantastically erotic.
    65. So pretty. You have a nice slow build and a touch of romance that I like.
    66. That was darker than I expected!
    67. Nice unexpected ending to an already hot scene.
    68. The repetition of his fingers makes it seem like he has more hands than possible. I like the story you unfold.
    69. I was confused about the POV and location of this scene.
    70. I wasn’t sure what the turn entailed, if he just finished pleasing her and then tied her up. Your description was luscious.
    72. Nice vivid scene!
    76. Nice twist to a dark story; I’m not sure how dark you’re taking your version. Makes me want to read more!
    77. I really hope that professor goes for a ride.
    78. I like how you take us through a number of sexy years with this one.
    80. I’m not sure what makes her perfect in light of a paddling but the emotional resonance pulled me in.
    81. Is it Eros that’s touching himself? I like the naughty twist to a sweet myth.
    82. You had me at “chocolate in the pockets”
    83. Love the metronome detail!
    85. Kinda jealous of the acrobatics. Nice job.
    87. You guys sure make delicious scenes out of somber moments!
    88. Loved it, especially the switch from watching to participating.

  19. 80) She’s Perfect (10 points): Good details, direct, sexy.
    8) The upgrade (9 points): Hot atmospherics. Evocative, with space to continue the story. Not my kink but sexy. (An important test, that.)
    26) Smoke and Fire (8 points): Sweet, realistic details, hot.
    9) The Internet Stranger (7 points): Sexy and evocative use of details, great twist ending.
    34) Even Better (6 points): Does sexual yearning really well. Good use of detail. Nice tension building to ending.
    11) Filthy Silhouettes (5 points): Hot situation, and erotic use of shadow-images is unusual and wins points from me.
    52) Incomplete Contrition (4 points): Good erotic details, especially the wanting. And that spanker is an Utter Bastard.
    13) Game Change (3 points): Nicely hot. Atmospheric evocation of orgy conditions. And a sudden hot ending. Great!
    17) Unconventional Convention (2 points): I like that it’s dialogue-driven: the sexiness of what people say. And I like the way it opens out story possibilities.

    Others:
    33) An Unexpected Consequence: love the close observation and detailing.
    41) Who is Watching: Not immediately obvious that the couple in the continuation is not the couple in the original snippet. But it quickly becomes so. Nice sexy details, and potential for future episodes.
    87) Eulogy Reverie: Good continuatiuon to a strong situation. Like the reverie being followed by possibility.

  20. This round I noticed that there are writers who just go right into the “smutty nitty gritty” and others who like to create atmosphere and mood in a scene first. It’s also interesting to see that stories from round 1 that did not get a lot of votes, did get picked to follow up on. Anyway, here’s a few of my favourites and why.
    The Dance (3) is full of swollen sentences that I think are daring in exaggeration. “it’s viciously spiked heel biting into the floor” and “the demon walks the line of lust leading to this stranger like it’s a tight-rope” are just deliciously bombastic. There’s a risk of course with language like this. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea. But given the genre here I feel it fits.
    Perfect Camouflage (6) is again a genre piece. The punchline really did it for me. It’s funny and I can imagine this to be the prologue of a great series about sexy vampire killer Olivia von Helsing. But what is well done in the piece is how perception and perspective are changed. First, we follow the vampire’s point of view: “Plastic costumery, he smirked to himself as she approached. Such sweet irony. Wannabes made delightful prey.” It’s only in the last revealing sentence that perspective changes to Olivia when he himself turns out to be the prey. Very clever.
    Temple Mount (12) picks up on the title of the piece of round 1, Medusa. Whether the first writer meant it to be in the realm of Greek mythology or not, the second writer took the bait in a very nice way. The first follow up sentence after “His heart stopped”, is just great as it describes the petrified state of the man. How “he hardens” has a clever erotic undertone, especially because Medusa soon lowers herself “onto the figure’s impressive length”. The piece ends with promising a larger story by hinting at Medusa’s backstory and her vengeful journey.
    Spit and Polish (16) was one of my favourite smutty nitty gritty contributions for this round. It succeeds in describing a sex scene in a very clear way. I often find sex scenes often quite hard to envision. Descriptions can be so intricate that I just wonder about where the characters are in relation to each other and their body parts. In this story, all positions are clear and described in a very sexy manner. I have never seen a dick described as “a glass tusk sleeved in warm velvet”. “Douze points” as they say in the Eurovision Song Contest 😉
    Like Her Father (29) picked up on a tricky first round story about a man getting aroused during a funeral service. This follow up is great in how it surprised me. The man’s arousal reveals his amorous relationship to the deceased and in this way refers to an intriguing backstory. At the same time, the daughter of the deceased becomes part of the arousal. So within 125 words we now know much more about this man. Also, the language in this piece is quite good. Best sentence: “Her voice sounded so much like his, all low and warm and husky, even as grief made the words thick and clumsy on her tongue.”
    The Mailman’s Wife (78) follows up on a story that quite a few others in round 2 also chose. What I found really clever in this one is that it jumps forward in time and takes the characters into a different situation. The round 1 scene is a memory now. That memory of how the two characters met, mingles with the wonderful drowsy feeling of the woman after having Sunday morning sex. The mailman still performs well: “he sleepily fucked me, a slow slick friction that enticed me from dreams with a gentle throbbing orgasm.” The scene has a distinctive sexiness to it that I really enjoyed.
    The Forces Sweetheart (82) really stood out for me. It’s beautifully written and it touched me. But, it’s also quite harsh and dark. The eroticism is rather off-putting instead of enticing. But still, really well written with great lyrical rhythm. Best sentence: “The house across the way throbs with masculine life; you can almost hear it. Smell it.”
    Others that struck me in one way or another were: Taking turns (70), Food Glorious Food (72), A Caged Anointing (73), Wartime Lament (75), Desire’s Edge (76), Parent Teacher Confidential (77), Prima Voluptas (79), Straight Shooter (81), Classical Training (85).

  21. Maybe its the mood I ma in but for this round nothing jumped out specifically. So I am just giving general feedback.
    The word count is still small so introducing a third person or a completely characters is difficult. There were a number of stories where I got confused and required re-reading as it wasn’t clear who was talking or doing.
    The other thing was the “bazinger” line. Many stories tried to add a twist or punchline in the last sentence. This seems to be a big risk as there were some great stories that got ruined. There were some other stories that made it on my first pass list due to a good final line but often dropped off my list on second reading.
    There were some great ideas and like the first round there were some that you could clearly see detail had been stripped to make the word count and then it was a struggle to fully understand and it was disappointing as there is clearly a better, deeper story in the authors mind.
    Those that made my final short-list were 11, 14, 36, 39, 47, 59 and 80
    And finally – Of course Die Hard is a Christmas movie

  22. Cathartic Release – I was caught up in the wrong spelling of threw vs through, but I thought this carried the story forward perfectly
    Cafe Anthropophagos – I like how you took the cue of the original and moved this into the supernatural. Your descriptions are strong “venomous languor”, “heated clench”. Nice job with this!
    The Dance – I loved the power within this story. My favorite parts were “line of lust” and the tight-rope references. I could picture this woman clearly and felt all of the power she held over him.
    Falling Hard – I loved the humorous line at the end about Die Hard. Finger curling around her wrist was a nice touch as well
    The Birds – This reminded me of a couple of teenagers at play. Was thrown off by the phrase “hide by the lake” should it be hide-away?
    Perfect Camouflage – I like how you turned this around and included Van Helsing. Interesting way to dispatch a vampire – getting what you want and then giving him the stake. I enjoyed this.
    The First Timer – This was erotic and funny at the same time. The last sentence is great!
    The upgrade – Nice sci fi twist!
    The internet stranger – I loved this until the last sentence. I know you were going for a twist, but it detracted from the delicious tension rather than adding to it.
    Unlocked Fantasies – I was a bit confused. Is Jeb the husband or the 2nd guy? Nice final line
    Filthy Silhouettes – You wrote this so clearly that I could see it happening. Would be interesting to take it further with the car that drove by
    Temple Mount – You did an excellent job continuing the Medusa theme
    Spit and Polish – The descriptions you used were strong – “mirror black brogues”, “glass tusk” and “split-glossy slit”. You pulled me in and left me panting for more.
    Unconventional Convention – You did an excellent job of portraying these two characters in such a short piece. I’d love to read more about them.
    Friend as a Bonus –
    Do you Dare – The final line confused me at first, but then I realized this must have been a planned fantasy. Perhaps there’s way to make that more clear? Although, with the limited number of words, it’s difficult. Other than that, you did a nice job with the interaction and the “climax”.
    All for Naught – In the original story, I pictured a model posing for a class. In your story, it sounds like they’re alone. It might have been even more interesting to keep it in a class setting. Love the “charcoal snaps” part!
    Hidden Agenda – I felt bad for her coming back to an empty table. It was a good twist, but I felt as disappointed as she must have.
    Even Better – This was put together well and I wanted to keep reading.

  23. There were so many good entries here it was incredibly difficult to vote for only three. Here are some stories that I really enjoyed, and some thoughts on those pieces.

    7 – The First Timer
    What an excellent story! You took what is usually fantasy fodder, described it really well and then threw in a little twist at the end that had me rolling on the floor.

    27 – Body over mind
    Your descriptions were very well done, I felt like I was sitting on that bus next to the two characters, feeling both the summer heat and the chemistry between the pair. I would humbly say that a title more apt to the summer theme would have worked better.

    34 – Even Better
    Another fantasy turned into reality (for me personally anyway!), and very well described. Again, the twist at the end makes it a perfect little vignette.

    36 – For the Tribe
    Despite the title warning me to expect it, the ending still snuck up on me there! I’m sure starting all three paragraphs with ‘Derek’ is a stylistic device, but it felt a little odd to me.

    39 – Office Daydream
    Oh, this is hot! Who hasn’t had a similar experience/daydream/fantasy at the workplace! A very ‘gentle’ ending to the story which made me grin, just like the lady in the piece.

    49 – Inner Monologue Failure
    Really liked this story, very well thought out and described too. The title though slightly disappointed me, because it gave away the twist in the story.

    66 – Pushing Up Daisy
    Firstly, well played with the title! In just two paragraphs I felt I learned volumes about the man who was dead, his daughter and now the protagonist who was taking over the empire, one assumes.

    76 – Desire’s Edge
    I loved the original story (Cutting Edge), and was very excited to see what you did with it. Making it a film set was a great idea, and the ending carried a subtle but definite undertone of malice there, great work.

    79 – Prima Voluptas
    Excuse me a second while I catch my breath! This story is hot! I felt carried away back into ancient Rome where I imagined this was set, and the adjectives were as bold as the actions described.

  24. Doing the feedback for this second was a bigger task than doing it for the first round. I had to read some stories several times to make sure I understood what the writer was trying to say, and sometimes even after leaving it for days, I still didn’t get the full story. Some people have done really well, and others seemed to find it difficult to continue someone else’s story, which showed in the piece they have added.

    Please find my feedback below:

    1. A Cathartic release: What I miss in this is that in the original piece he was sitting on the sofa, and in your continuation he bends her over the sofa, but he never stood up from the sofa. I like what you have added, but this bit bothered me some.

    2. Café Anthropophagos: The sentence “This wasn’t her handsome restauranteur. ” Feels out of place and I think it would have made the part you have added even stronger if you had left that out. Also, be careful to start a sentence with ‘but’, especially if it’s the start of a new paragraph.

    3. The Dance: I have little to say about what you have added, other than that I really like it. A lot! You have managed to continue the piece in the same style, and make it one strong piece.

    4. Falling Hard: I had to read this a couple of times to fully understand the dialogue that has been added, but even then, I don’t really get the Die Hard part. I guess that this is what they have talked about before?

    5. The Birds: I like how you have ended your piece with his name again, and the dialogue you have added feels natural again. The title and testing him on his knowledge of birds is an interesting twist to the story.

    6. Perfect Camouflage: I love the twist you have given here, where at first you allow the reader to think that she was going to be the victim, but then he was. Towards the end of this you started too many sentences without a pronoun, which weakens the piece some.

    7. The First Timer: Okay, where I wasn’t a fan of the original piece, you have managed to make me smile. Just as out of place as I found the original aircon remark and the ‘oh’ at the end, I find the remark about the dentist, but all put together, this is a good, humorous piece!

    8. The upgrade: I absolutely love this entry, love what you have done with the original piece! I would actually love to read more of this story!

    9. The Internet Stranger: I found the change of perspective a bit difficult, but have to say that the twist in the last line definitely made me forget about that.

    10. Unlocked Fantasies: I have started reading this story over and over for several times, until I realized what took me totally out of it… the ‘I’ character knocks on the door and then the ‘I’ character pulls her husband into the apartment as if he was the one who knocked on the door? Or am I reading this totally wrong? Maybe ‘pulling’ should have been ‘following’, which would have made it more logical? Then, reading on, it seems that the ‘I’ character is pulling her husband into the apartment after all, and the other man was already in the apartment. See the confusion? The story is definitely not bad, but to me it was difficult to get into it because of the reasons mentioned.

    11. Filthy Silhouettes: I liked the hot scene in the first round and you have just managed to make it even hotter!

    12. Temple Mount: I really like everything about this!

    13. Game Change: Now this is the kind of party I would love to go to! Hot story! I would have changed “She was about to sit up when …” to “She was about to sit up …”

    14. Rock Show: A nice story, where I can feel the beat of the music, but not the warmth of the eroticism.

    15. Backstage Fright: It’s not a bad story, but somehow you have managed to lose me entirely while reading your story. There’s something about the structure of the sentence starting with “The provocative show they had attended…” that makes it difficult for me to remember what I have read before and to concentrate on what’s following.

    16. Spit and Polish: The first thing that I noticed when I started reading this was that the chosen piece was written in the past tense, and you added present tense. However, the words used here, and the way your story is told totally made me forget about that. Beautiful writing!

    17. Unconventional Convention: My curiosity was raised as two who ‘he’ was in the first round, and I had really hoped something hot would be added to it. However, the conversation you have added unfortunately didn’t peak my interest. Sorry.

    18. Friend as Bonus: The piece you have added sounds like a summary of events and not a story. This might be because of the many short sentences, but also because there was just too much happening. The last three sentences could have been one sentence.

    19. Do You Dare?: First of all, I like that your title seems to be an answer on the title of the story in the first round. I also like the twist in this, and how you have managed to put the urgency of their actions in your words after the bathroom door had closed. Well done!

    20. All For Naught: You have managed to make me hold my breath when she moved, as I just felt how she was ruining the masterpiece, but what a way to have it ruined. Great story!

    21. The Lunch Shower: A nice addition to the original piece, but I feel it need some more work. Some details could have been left out such as the pen falling on the floor, and mentioning that his arousal began to stir.

    22. Feeding Time: I understand what you have done here, to use the first part where the ‘I’ character is the woman, then it’s the man in the second paragraph and back to the woman in the third. I am not sure this jumping from perspective to perspective works for me. It might work in a longer story though.

    23. Late Charge: I like the dynamic in this. The only sentence I would have left out is “He sits and smooths down his tie.” as something similar has been mentioned in the original entry.

    24. Familiar: The moment you started the dialogue, it took me out of the story, while I like your first and last paragraphs. I think this piece would have been stronger if there was no dialogue.

    25. Drinking Game: Yes! I love everything about what you have added, how you have managed to build the eroticism, continuing the story someone else had started. Well done!

    26. Smoke and Fire: I am sorry, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t make sense of this story. They were sitting together under the throw and then the ‘I’ character tossed her a pair of leggings? Why if they were sitting together? And why the ‘boots and cats and boots and cats’ in the last sentence? I’m afraid I don’t get it?

    27. Body over mind: I like the tongue-in-cheek way this has been written, especially the last paragraph! Nice continuation of the round 1 story where I originally felt something was missing.

    28. A Second Chance: The first assignment was to write a story about the first time two people saw each other. With that in mind I started reading this, and then reading that they had been together before took me totally out of the story. Sorry.

    29. Like Her Father: I like the twist you have given this story and the clasped hands in the end feel natural. It makes me wonder if the daughter knew about it, because her gaze narrowed. Nice addition to the original piece.

    30. So Very Yes: Another nice addition to the original piece, but I do have a question. In the first paragraph you wrote “She couldn’t help herself” and the later on you said she and her flat mate had spoken about it the night before. So why couldn’t she help herself? To me this implied that it was a spur-of-the-moment decision to follow and not something that has been planned?

    31. Perfect Pair: I feel that you could’ve used less words in the paragraph starting with ‘and’ to bring across what you wanted to say. I’m not fond of starting paragraphs with ‘and’. Starting a sentence in the middel of a paragraph this way mostly isn’t a problem. The moment I read ‘who’s’ I was taken out of your story, and had to re-read the sentence. It should’ve been ‘whose’ because now what you actually are saying is “for the woman who is eyes told her more”. Because of this, I also noticed the spelling error of ‘self-aware’. Not a bad addition at all, but be careful not to take your reader out of your story with wrongly used words.

    32. Hidden Agenda: That last line… brilliant! You have managed to make the first piece, which I felt missed something, a lot stronger than it was. Good writing.

    33. An Unexpected Consequence: The first thing I noticed was your change in tenses. The original piece was written in past tense and you continued in the present. Then I re-read what you have written a couple of times and I am really sorry to say, but I have no idea what this is about. Yes, about hands, but as from “She finds herself looking at hands…” it feels like it has nothing to do with what comes before that. Sorry.

    34. Even Better: I wonder if in the real world a woman would be happy if a man just assumes he can fuck her ass? Sorry, that was just the first thought that came up when I read this. What you have added is well written though.

    35. Successful Shopping: Up to ‘gritty strip mall’ the story was good, but you could have left all of the rest away or have worked what you wanted to say there into the first paragraph. The last two paragraphs just feel totally out of place.

    36. For the Tribe: You could have left the first two sentences you have written away, as you are saying exactly the same as the first writer had already done. Also, it’s unclear why his world went dark? It would have benefitted your story if you clarified that in the piece that followed.

    37. Delivered by Hand: Sorry, but this story really makes me uneasy. Father and son?

    38. Early encounter: The part you have added is not bad, but it calls up some questions. I would have put “I will pick…” in italics since that’s a quote from an email. You lost me there for a moment, because I thought he was talking to her. With dialogue, the punctuation marks – commas and full stops – are supposed to be inside the dialogue tags, not outside. And, who spoke in the end?

    39. Office Daydream: The part you have added totally fits the part you have chosen to continue. A nice daydream.

    40. Sweet Jane: I like everything about the part that you have added, except the dialogue. I can’t really say why, other than for me it took away the strength of what is in the paragraph before. I think the piece would have held its strength for me if you have used only the last line of dialogue.

    41. Who is Watching: I think there’s a word missing in the first sentence you have added? There are missing punctuation marks in the sentence starting with ‘Glancing across’ and in this sentence, semi-dark misses a dash. Also, a personal preference of me is to have inner dialogue (What will she think?) in italics.

    42. Monster Hunter: A nice addition to the original piece. The story reads as one. One thing: “Soon their in her car” should be “Soon they’re in her car”.

    43. Arranged Marriage: Yes! This is a well written and totally fitting piece you have added to the original one. Well done!
    Just one thing: brides room should be bride’s room or brides’ room

    44. Life After Death: Now I get that life and death lies very close to each other, but having recently lost a parent, I know that sex was definitely not something I thought of at the funeral, which makes this story unbelievable to me. I understand that you wanted bring some eroticism in the story, but this was just a bit too much. I’m sorry.

    45. Made to Watch: At first, I was confused as it seemed the story switched from third to first voice, but then I realized how the first round entry was used, which immediately cleared the confusion. Nice story.

    46. Business Meeting: It’s an interesting way to write a story, skipping from perspective to perspective with each new paragraph, and then ending the story with a line that either of them could have thought.

    47. Special Delivery: A hot addition to the original piece. I personally never used a number in a story.

    48. My Kalika: You paint a beautiful picture with this story; a perfect use of the round 1 story. Well done.

    49. Inner Monologue Failure: I like the conversation, and the hint of sexiness.

    50. The Kinetoscope: The first piece has been written in the first person perspective, but what you have added is third person. Also, the first piece was in past tense and you added present tense. Despite that, what you have added is beautifully written and adds to the sadness and devastation of the first part.

    51. Bless Me: The original entry was one which I thought the author could have done more with, and it definitely wasn’t one of my favorites. But I feel you have turned that around with the words you have added. I am never a fan of first and second person narratives, but this one works for me.

    52.Incomplete Contrition: I liked the original entry, and I definitely like what you have added here. The abrupt ending of the sentence before “next” makes the story even stronger. Nice piece of writing!

    53. The journey: My feedback for the first round story was that I wanted to know what happens next. I think you have tried to say too much in the piece you have added, which makes it a bit hard to read. “Will she follows through?” should have been “Will she follow through?” and “Red stilettos awaits him” should have been “Red stilettos await him”. I get the gasp after he sees the red stilettos, but I feel it should have been worked in to the piece in a different way. The sentence starting with ‘Delights’ is confusing.

    54. Invitation: I liked the original piece, and I like what you have added here, and how you managed to build the suspense even more. The repetition of action in the last paragraph, first showing, then telling, works for me too.

    55. The Sexiest Smile: A nice addition to the original piece.

    56. To Your Taste: I read the first sentence you added over and over again and still don’t know what you tried to say with that. Other than that, a nice addition. The ‘but..’. should have been ‘but…’ and I would have put “It never came.” on the next line. The ‘Happy Birthday’ could have been put at the end of the line before, as it now looks like you have forgotten the closing tag for your dialogue.

    57. Yours, Sir: You have used the story from round 1 very well as basis for your story.

    58. Inspiring Desperation: I’m not sure jumping from the female perspective in the first round to the male perspective in your piece works for me. The last sentence doesn’t seem like a full sentence?

    59. Art of Desire: If I understand correctly, the ‘I’ character paints someone and he again is being painted by a third person?

    60. Entrapment: Definitely a good addition to a first-round piece that I felt wasn’t strong at all.

    61. The Blended Composition: It’s like the charcoal is making love to the image being created on paper. Nice.

    62. Killer Climax: I bloody love what you have added to the original story! Well done!

    63. She owns me: Another nice addition to the original story.

    64. Holding Off: A nude bar? Now there’s a place I would love to go to. An original angle for a story.

    65. Made for Me: I like that you have continued the musical terms, but still have a feeling that what you have added doesn’t really fit the piece from round 1. Also, I had to google ‘fretboard’ and ‘Satin Cherry Gibson’ as I had no idea what it was, and it distracted me too much to be able to read on.

    66. Pushing Up Daisy: I know I have given the same kind of feedback on two other stories. One: the way you have written your piece doesn’t sound like they have just met each other, while that was what the pieces from round 1 was about. Two: I don’t think that while a child is burying a parent sex is something that’s on their minds. Or, it might just be me who thinks like this. Sorry.

    67. A Simple Request: A nice addition to the original story.
    “he throat” should have been “her throat”.

    68. Hands that Bind: The story you have added totally doesn’t fit the story you have chosen to continue.

    69. The Assignment: I have a feeling the two pieces don’t fit together? The first part is in the first person perspective and your added piece is in the third person perspective, which weakens what you have added.

    70. Taking turns: The sentence starting with ‘Her body’ is far too long, or is missing some punctuation. Then, the sentence following, starting with ‘Like an arrow’ seems like a something that should have been added to the sentence before. I think these two sentences need to be restructured.

    71. You surprised me: It’s a nice addition to the original piece, but unfortunately if I had voted, this one wouldn’t have gotten my vote due to the lack of dialogue punctuation.

    72. Food Glorious Food: The original entry was strong and had potential to become even stronger, depending on what the second author added. Unfortunately, you haven’t succeeded in this. I liked the first piece of dialogue, but then the sentence “I followed sat and watched her make love to a cream cake” took me out of the story. Remember your punctuation marks.

    73. A Caged Anointing: A nice addition, and great writing about two men, but starting almost all sentences with ‘I’ or ‘he’ or ‘my’ dulls the words you have added.

    74. That escalated quickly: I love what you have added, and also the way you have left the story open at the end.

    75. Wartime Lament: Where I felt that something was missing in the original piece, now, with the part you have added, it becomes a strong flash fiction story. It’s clear that you have thought about every word, and not one word is wasted in your story. I love what you have done with this, and this entry definitely is one of my favorites!

    76. Desire’s Edge: The piece you have added made the original piece even stronger than it already was. The way in the end he has a desire for the dark, to experience the scene for real. Brilliant. One of my favorites!

    77. Parent Teacher Confidential: Oh yes. A great addition to the original story! Well done!

    78. The Mailman’s Wife: I really love what you have added here. In so little words you have managed to write a complete story, a story of love and sexiness. Well done!

    79. Prima Voluptas: I liked this, up to the words “Please your domina” as this actually disappointed me that this turned to be about a power exchange relationship. I would have loved to just see some sex(iness). Sorry.
    Tip: When you use dialogue tags like ‘she said’, then you use a comma after what is said and not a full stop.

    80. She’s Perfect: A nice addition to the original piece.

    81. Straight Shooter: I really like the tongue-in-cheek piece you have added, and the nice detail where fist pumps and his cock twitches, also the description of aiming for the butt. Well done!

    82. The Forces Sweetheart: I really like what you have added here. My first reaction when I read this was that starting each sentence on a new line makes it a staccato read, but on the second and third read I realized just how well the sentences work, and how sad this actually is “There’s always someone else.”
    This really is a good continuance of the first round story.

    83. Realized anticipation: I like the imagery of the metronome, and actually like the rest you have written too.

    84. Art Lover: The first paragraph you have added is strong, and the second one is strong until the last sentence. I understand that you wanted to work to a climax, but think it could have been done by still using the imagery of the painting. Certainly not a bad piece of writing, but just a personal observation from my side.

    85. Classical Training: Quite an acrobatic continuance of the story. I like it!

    86. Broken by looks: The first thing I noticed was using ‘however’ three times in this short piece, and I think the second one was an error, as ‘he’ is with a capital? Using too many words like ‘however’, ‘somehow, ‘even though’ and ‘always’ make the piece a bit difficult to read.

    87. Eulogy Reverie: Another piece using The Funeral and when I read your second paragraph, I thought: yes! I liked the next paragraph too, and then read the next. Liked the locking of eyes, but then, with her eyes sliding down his form, you lost me. She was just incredibly emotional as she has buried her father, and then the next moment she’s thinking about sex? Please note that there is nothing wrong with what you have written, and that my remark is a highly personal observation, having buried a parent too.

    88. Pride and Avarice: In the second paragraph you introduce her husband, and then continue to talk about ‘he’. You lost me there, as I had to go back to see who ‘he’ is. Be careful with too many characters in such a short piece as it can confuse your readers.

  25. My votes went to the stories that continued in the same vein (or better, took a twist to the original). I decided to only vote for those that kept somewhat faithful to the original in terms of tense and first / third person.

    1) I like how this was a slow-burn (as slow as you can for 100 words).
    5) Nice twist on the all-too-tired vampire trope.
    7) Another surprise twist on the original work.
    14) So many emotions running through this story and it dovetails so well with the initial prompt. The euphoria of a favourite band and an encounter with a stranger – erotic and well written.
    25) Not smutty but erotic and though we feel the noisy bar full of people, we see these two flirting in their own little bubble.
    30) This reads as one complete story. Somehow I expected a locker room in the original story but this way works well.
    32) Some of these part #2’s have taken an unexpected turn and this one stood out, teasing a promise and then leaving the reader hanging with anticipation.
    40) The desire in this story comes through and we feel Jane’s excitement in the wait.
    49) These two parts bounce off one another so neatly and it has a very satisfying conclusion.
    53) Nice callback to the first story’s title. It’s a good, complete story, though it complements the first.
    54) Another story where the action comes before the thought and finally, hard realism strikes. This is cleverly done.
    61) The story has life showing the woman coming alive on the canvas. It’s a nice parallel.

  26. I had fun reading these!

    With so many to read I’m finding that what’s generally true for me is even more so in voting — a story has to have more than general kink and smut tropes to get me to want to linger with it.

    Here are some notes I made along the way. *s are ones I was thinking of voting for. It is easier (faster) for me to write positive comments but I tried to throw in a few useful critiques too.

    #4 is funny! Though it doesn’t strike me as hot at all, it was the first one I really liked.

    #5 does not ring true for me

    #6 I don’t understand the details or how it’s smut

    #7 made me smile, and that counts for a lot

    #9 does a good job of leaving me imagining

    #12 interested me but it didn’t strike me as hot

    #13 I think it can be more effective to leave the reader with some curiosity about what’s next

    *#16 Is hot and well told

    #17 I’d like more hotness here – or even better sense of what’s next but I like this one. The dialogue is good, and the content.

    #19 this one’s a contender for me, though I think it could have ended more successfully at “Seeing the dare in her eyes, he says, “Sure.””

    *#23 I love this one! And “He thumps into her palm.” Is my favorite line in any of these so far. Overall the action is well-told in this one.

    *#25 I like how tactile this one is

    #32 oh no! This is well told but … not smut?

    #36 weird and dirty! You get a lot of good action in here and it leaves me imagining…

    *#39 very relatable and kind of sweet, while still hot

    *#44 I was responding to this story too and I like your version. Kind of absurdist but in a hot way

    *#49 this one’s charming and well told

    *#52 this is one of my favorites so far! It has some surprise and some straight up hotness. A winning combination.

    #59 great setting and story

    #62 sometimes I like the premise but the storytelling doesn’t come together

    #66 I find that the end of your story doesn’t connect very well to the rest of your setup

    #68 I like the end to this one, hot

    **#73 I love gay smut and I love your last line. Good pacing and storytelling in this one too.

    **#78 this one caught me by surprise in a good way, and I like the warmth of it

    #87 the plot of this one’s too vague

    *#88 this one has a lot poetry to the smut which always works for me

    🖤🖤🖤 love you sexy smut writers xx

  27. Wow! The round 1 entries were good, but in round 2 every one was just a pleasure to read and just straight-up intimidating! I didn’t get a chance to comment on round 1, but I was determined to be better in round 2. So here goes?

    1) A Cathartic release
    …I really dig this one! Right off the bat you hit all the right buttons for me, lol, and it’s lovely to boot! A couple little editing things: “My” in the first sentence shouldn’t be capitalized, and at least in American English ‘threw’ should be ‘through,’ (I can’t speak to other English spellings though, so I can’t actually swear it’s wrong) but seriously, those are of such little consequence I honestly didn’t even notice either of them when I first tagged this one to comment on. What a blissful catharsis, indeed. It’s lovely!

    2) Café Anthropophagos
    Okay, this was mine, but I wanted to take the chance to say something about Marsha Adams’ round 1 entry that I continued, since I didn’t comment in round 1. Anyway…

    I loved this prompt and I’m *super* curious where the original writer actually imagined this going? With the collar and ‘another quickie’ and the ‘exquisite horror’ of his form only revealed in the freezer… so intriguing! If you’re reading this, Marsha Adams, what’s really going on?! I want to know! Crazy awesome prompt!

    4) Falling Hard
    I love this, it’s beautiful writing and the last line genuinely surprised me into laughing. Literal lol. My only suggestion with this one is admittedly a contentious one, so take it as you like (and you don’t know me, so no hard feelings if you don’t take it all!)—but I get the feeling you’re in the avoid-overusing-‘said’ school?

    I know that’s a popular opinion lately, but I was taught that ‘said’ is an invisible word and less obtrusive than a lot of the synonyms that people use instead. IMO it can give dialogue a slightly strange feel where no one is ever *just* saying stuff (like most of us usually do in normal conversations?), instead every word is a jab, a murmur, a whisper, a declaration, a confession… The problem being, most ‘synonyms’ for said aren’t really? You can use shout instead of said, as on obvious example of the problem, but it has different implications for the way the words were expressed, the emotions of those involved, and the way the scene ends up being played in people’s heads. Ditto, ‘ripostes,’ ‘admits,’ and ‘suggests.’ I’d probably keep admits but replace ripostes and suggests with ordinary saids. Especially since you did such a good job using actions as speech tags with most of the other dialogue, I don’t think it would have been overusing said at all? (Heh, since I’m not arguing it *can’t* be overused, of course, just that there are other ways of dealing with it that you were already using.)

    Anyway, sorry for hijacking that (as a writer, I will die on the Hill of Said! 😉 ). I was definitely hooked on this one and I’d happily keep reading about these interesting, quirky people if this was the start of something longer!

    14) Rock Show
    Gorgeous writing! What really seals it for me is the last line. I can picture every part of it, the whole way through, feel the press and heat of the crowd, hear the pounding music, the elation, the energy, and then that last line really brings it back to them: the couple in the middle of it, the subset of the whole. Love it!

    37) Delivered by Hand
    Unf! Well written *and this one took an unexpected and delightful turn! Maybe you just hooked me with that ‘beautifully dressed,’ ‘handsome older man,’ with the ‘strong, tanned face,’ lol. I really liked this—very hot…

    63) She owns me
    So sensual! Lovely writing that gives such a clear sense of the scene. The Domme’s stern touch and control, the sub’s excitement and longing—and the tease at the end that turns into that last, beautifully visual line. Guh!

    65) Made for Me
    Dang! Another one that’s just lovely! The writing is beautiful; I like the details about the guitars. It’s a subject I know nothing about but it lends a depth to the story, the color, texture, scent, a sensuality about the guitars that echoes the object of the main character’s interest. And then of course the vaguely threatening/thrilling possessiveness of that last sentiment… lovely!

    76) Desire’s Edge
    Oh my, yes! I’d had this round 1 entry on my list to maybe continue for round 2 but I couldn’t figure out a way to go on from it that I really felt comfortable with. This angle never occurred to me and I love it! And there’s such a lovely menace in the ending of it, with wanting to ‘feel her, frightened, again’ …especially the ‘for real’ bit. Delicious possibilities there!

    If I had more time I’d’ve easily found something to say about all of the round 2 entries, because wow, they’re all really good, even the ones that didn’t lean towards my personal kinks. Well done, everybody!

  28. Starting with apologies; Eroticon is less than a week away and I am swamped and so I have not been able to write as much feedback as I normally would but I can assure you I have made notes on every story so again, if you want to chat about your piece and know my thoughts on it, get in touch. I might not get back to you until after Eroticon but I will get back to you eventually.

    Some general thoughts.

    If you write a sex scene, basically a description of two people doing whatever, then you are probably not going to stand out because there is nothing for me to engage with and we are back to who, why, where, when issues again and there were quite a few pieces that suffered from this sadly.

    Beware of the obvious! I am sure you are wondering what makes something obvious, how do you identify you have done that without knowing what everyone else is thinking. Well it’s tough but as I said in the last round if it’s the first thought you had then maybe consider whether that is why. Also if it falls into a story narrative that has been done to death before then that might also be something to consider. For example He is so Dom and she instantly falls under his spell etc.

    Lots of people used the Losing myself by MasterMHatter and The Mailman as their prompt and mostly wrote very similar versions of the same story. One that didn’t was The Mailman’s wife, and by thinking outside the box wrote a piece that for me stood out from all the others that used that opening.

    Some other general writing tips. Be careful of repeating words, particularly in a short piece. “His swollen cock nudged my swollen lips” This is an extreme example but there are pieces here that suffered from that. A thesaurus is your friend. Same with phrases: So if the story tells us The door is open, the next line does not need to be dialogue of someone saying the door is open. We, the reader know this, and you have precious few words as it is, don’t waste them on repeating stuff.

    With reference to this actual task:

    There were a quite few that felt like that were not really related to the piece the author has decided to use as their prompt: 68) Hands that Bind is one example where I feel like you maybe you wrote it with a different opening in mind and as a result it doesn’t make sense.

    There were also some that just didn’t fit the tone of the prompt used. So although it seemed connected it just didn’t feel like the two really went together or that it didn’t flow from the prompt into your piece you added which was fairly jarring.

    Also there were quite a few here that had real potential/were good ideas for a story but you just didn’t have enough words to do the story justice. For example 36) For the Tribe and 19. Do You Dare? With 500 words these stories could have worked but as they are they feel rushed.

    Now to my votes…

    62) Killer Climax
    Although this piece did not pick up exactly where the piece you picked left off you writing was so strong that it didn’t matter as what you carried me straight into the story. The fairly short choppy sentences worked well allowing you to cover a lot in few words and you kept the focus tight on that moment resisting the temptation to try to include too much. And top marks for being brave and writing a story that pushed the boundaries when it comes to arousal and acceptable behaviour. The taboo nature of it definitely turned me on.

    3) The Dance

    You paint a very vivid picture of her and this moment; it is full of anticipation and sexual tension. “Her gifts were not designed for comfort” and “She feels the ache of his erection as if it were her own” are just so powerful and the whole thing throbs with a delicious eroticism. I found myself almost holding my breath by the end and wanting more. This is some really excellent writing

    75) Wartime Lament
    I really like the conflict in this piece. Having a tears fetish is not the most taboo thing but in this setting and playing on someone’s vulnerability without their knowledge definitely makes it very taboo and as a result this piece really stood out for me because not only is the writing excellent but you told a different and unique story which feels edgy and exciting.
    76) Desire’s Edge
    This is another piece that combines really strong writing with a clever plot. You took the prompt piece in a totally different direction but not so much so that it lost connection with it. Far from it in fact, this part “Had she felt it too? Lust blooming in savagery, hidden behind the scene’s pretense.” really brings the whole thing together beautifully and that last main paragraph really gives the story a dark and slightly dangerous feel to it that I find very sexy.

    69) The Assignment
    Again another example of a story where the author did something different. You picked a piece to carry on that quite a few others did as well but you took it in a totally different direction. You also managed to tell a whole story in just a few words and it is easy to completely understand why she took the class and I found myself smiling happily when she chose her cunt over her homework.

    58) Inspiring Desperation

    There is potential for more of the story here but it is also perfectly complete as it is. At its heart it is about power and vulnerability and I am fairly sure that the narrator of the piece is probably not a good person and yet there is a dark eroticism to it that is truly revealed at the end with that really excellent killer last line.

    82) The Forces Sweetheart
    This is some beautiful writing and I spent quite a bit time trying to decide where to place it in my votes because despite the strong writing it felt slightly like something was missing and I am still not sure I know what that is. I do know that I love this line “The house across the way throbs with masculine life; you can almost hear it. Smell it” but I just couldn’t fully connect with the character, maybe there is an element of ‘why’ to the piece that feels missing.

    78) The Mailman’s Wife
    Absolutely well done for taking this piece that quite a lot of people used in a totally different direction. I will say that the opening line or two confused me on my first read but as I pressed on it all fell into place. It has a lovely tender and sweet tone to it, mingled in with a subtle eroticism that captured the feel of a slow morning fuck and time together as a couple perfectly

    29) Like Her Father
    This one grabbed my attention instantly. This line “even as grief made the words thick and clumsy on her tongue.” is really beautiful and the rest of the story hints at a potentially unconventional relationship however on rereading I increasingly found the ending putting me off. It makes me feel like I am missing something, or that something bad is about to happen whereas I feel like if his reaction had been an uncomfortable embarrassment maybe at his thoughts and her gaze on him that would have been a stronger more satisfying end.

  29. 46 Business Meeting (10)
    What I liked: I’m a sucker for infidelity as a theme, and I think straightforward, not-too-flowery prose tends to be far more effective in erotica than using lots of adjectives – and the former is exactly what you’ve done very successfully here.
    What I thought could be improved: I wasn’t sure about character consistency – we know in the first paragraph that he’s going to cheat (he has before), so the self-justification that happens at the end rings slightly false

    4 Falling Hard (9)
    What I liked: The dialogue – it’s playful and fun, and it rang pretty true for me, which surprised me, because they’re teasing each other in quite a silly way. Basically, this was one of the stories I kept thinking about, which is why it scored so highly.
    What I thought could be improved: Humour is risky – I don’t think it’s inherently sexy, and if not for all the excellent dialogue, the ‘comedic twist’ at the end could have cost this points from me

    33 An Unexpected Consequence (8)
    What I liked: The zoomed-in focus on the hands – I think this is a super-effective way of creating a powerful piece within such a short word count.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t love the dialogue, I’m afraid – I found it slightly too formal and it affected the way I perceived the chemistry between the characters.

    78 The Mailman’s Wife (7)
    What I liked: The way you took a super-hot premise and combined it with a touching love story to give it a kind of dual power.
    What I thought could be improved: The style of your prose is quite different from the original story, which makes the two parts sit a bit uneasily together – you might have tried to match the styles more closely – but that was really the only fault I could find with this.

    65 Made for Me (6)
    What I liked: This is one of the few stories in this round that went heavy on the descriptive language that I thought really worked – good use of adjectives! Also, that made the character of the girl feel very real to me.
    What I thought could be improved: Only more smuttiness could have made this score higher – it’s more romantic than smutty, I thought.

    66 Pushing up Daisy (5)
    What I liked: The sex in this is really hot – I could visualise it and I was very into it. I could see that I could get off to this idea.
    What I thought could be improved: Careful not to undermine the sexiness through the pun-based comedy in the title.

    45 Made to Watch (4)
    What I liked: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about this story, which is why it didn’t score higher for me, but the writing is confident and fluid and this is a situation that would appeal to many readers, I imagine.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘My love and my life’ is a little clichéd – could you have ended this in a more original way, perhaps?

    13 Game Change (3)
    What I liked: The multi-sensory nature of your writing – I could feel that hard floor!
    What I thought could be improved: As with the previous story, this is a nice story, but there’s nothing particularly fresh or original about it – it would have scored more highly if there had been

    82 The Forces Sweetheart (2)
    What I liked: I really liked this character – and I liked that the ‘wrongness’ of what she’s doing is further underlined by the fact she’s being ‘paid’ in cigarettes or chocolate.
    What I thought could be improved: The idea and the character are lovely, but your prose is so spare it becomes a bit staccato for me and I can’t seem to quite get inside the story.

    1 A Cathartic release
    What I liked: I like the way you use speech as a bridge between the original prompt part of the story and your own continuation.
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about your continuation, I’m afraid.

    2. Café Anthropophagos
    What I liked: Gosh, this is so jam-packed with sensation! Meat on hooks! The cold! His eyes! Lovely!
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t really understand what was happening, I’m afraid, which is why you didn’t score points from me, but I thought your writing was lovely.

    3. The Dance
    What I liked: Great use of a variety of sentence lengths to give your prose a nice rhythm.
    What I thought could be improved: Be careful to make it very clear that Aeznell and the demon are the same person (at least I think they are!), as this could confuse the reader.

    5. The Birds
    What I liked: I’m quite turned on by the scenario of two people groping in a birdwatching hide.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t believe the transition – would she really invite a man she seems to have just met to an isolated place so quickly?

    6. Perfect Camouflage
    What I liked: Great twist – it’s not ‘that’ surprising, I guess, but it works very well in such a short piece because the tables get turned so quickly. Almost made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: The first paragraph is clever, but a touch overwritten, imo. Give the reader something concrete to grab on to from the start.

    7. The First Timer
    What I liked: It’s not strictly my kink, but I’d imagine that for people who are into this, the sex would be hot here.
    What I thought could be improved: The humour just doesn’t work for me, I’m afraid – it undermines any potential sexiness here.

    8. The upgrade
    What I liked: Your prose is confident and enjoyable to read.
    What I thought could be improved: You could have tried to include more of the actual sex – you’ve effectively ‘closed the bedroom door’ by skipping straight to ‘after a wholly satisfying pounding.’

    9. The Internet Stranger
    What I liked: Really good multi-sensory descriptions, and, for the most part, just the right amount of adjectives – neither over- nor under-written. Almost made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m not a fan of ‘pervades’ – in contrast with most of your language, I think this is too flowery. Keep verbs simple where possible, I think.

    10. Unlocked Fantasies
    What I liked: You’ve allowed most of your word count for the sex – very sensible in a smut writing competition!
    What I thought could be improved: You wouldn’t really be able to tell the two men apart – when all characters are conventionally attractive, they don’t really stay in the reader’s mind for long.

    11. Filthy Silhouettes
    What I liked: The first paragraph! Really hot!
    What I thought could be improved: This feels less of a story and more of a scene to me, to be honest.

    12. Temple Mount
    What I liked: I thought it was really brave of you to include a lead character who’d been raped and is now reclaiming her own agency and sexuality – very powerful.
    What I thought could be improved: I got a bit lost in the language of your writing – which was very sensual but therefore quite hard to grab onto – I’d have preferred slightly simpler prose.

    14. Rock Show
    What I liked: The second paragraph is much more powerful than the first, in my opinion – it conjures up a feeling of young love/desire for me.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t really like ‘I lock onto your lips’, I’m afraid – this didn’t sound very sexy to me.

    15. Backstage Fright
    What I liked: I very much liked that he took her playbill not Lorena’s – I could feel the character’s excitement in this moment.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m not sure about the use of the word ‘bottomless’ – is there a sexier word you could have used instead?

    16. Spit and Polish
    What I liked: I think your dialogue, although there’s not much of it, is well-written.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘a glass tusk sleeved in warm velvet’ is overwritten to my tastes, I’m afraid.

    17. Unconventional Convention
    What I liked: This one grew on me the more I read – as the characters warmed to each other, I warmed to them too. I also thought the later bits of dialogue were therefore more plausible than the first couple of exchanges.
    What I thought could be improved: Whose viewpoint are we in here? It wasn’t always clear to me, especially in the first paragraph.

    18. Friend as Bonus
    What I liked: I think your use of short, snappy sentences is effective.
    What I thought could be improved: In your efforts to continue the story plausibly, I think you’ve focused a bit too much on logistics and not enough on the smut, I’m afraid.

    19. Do You Dare?
    What I liked: I really like the dialogue, and, although I wasn’t sure I should, I did buy that they were into each other and the speed at which things therefore moved.
    What I thought could be improved: I was disappointed that they knew each other – this ending felt predictable to me, I’m afraid.

    20. All For Naught
    What I liked: This very nearly made my shortlist. It’s confidently and effectively written.
    What I thought could be improved: For me, it needed an element of surprise or twist adding to make it go from a good piece to an excellent one.

    21. The Lunch Shower
    What I liked: That the characters want different kinds of sex – very plausible!
    What I thought could be improved: There are some minor spelling and punctuation issues here that you might be able to fix if you took another look at it.

    22. Feeding Time
    What I liked: I felt like the style of your writing fitted well with the original piece, so the transition between the two was quite smooth
    What I thought could be improved: Probably best not to change perspective in such a short piece – if you focus on one only you can give us more insight into that character

    23. Late Charge
    What I liked: Nice dialogue!
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t understand the use of the word ‘tell’ in the story, I’m afraid, but that may just be me.

    24. Familiar
    What I liked: I really bought Victoria’s embarrassment about how her conversation isn’t exactly sparkling!
    What I thought could be improved: I’m not sure I believed that a man would notice something like a pin – sorry! Also, breasts ‘pushing through to get a look at him’ just felt a bit porny and implausible.

    25. Drinking Game
    What I liked: This is very sensual despite the absence of actual sex – I really liked the focus on every detail of the character’s actions. Nice title, too!
    What I thought could be improved: Careful not to slide towards cliché – I feel like erotica has a lot of eyes ‘darkening with desire’

    26. Smoke and Fire
    What I liked: the details – non-matching bra and pants, Tetris block leggings – very visually rich.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t understand the references in the final paragraph at all, I’m afraid.

    27. Body over mind
    What I liked: surprisingly (to me!) I quite liked that her pussy had a mind of its own – I think this was a risky approach to take, but you pulled it off
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    28. A Second Chance
    What I liked: The story here is very plausible – it’s a nice take on the premise that was set up in the first round.
    What I thought could be improved: There could be more description of the characters – ‘her curves’ is quite generic.

    29. Like Her Father
    What I liked: This very nearly made my shortlist – it’s confident, accomplished writing and a great take on the premise set up in the first round.
    What I thought could be improved: I couldn’t visualise either character, sadly – give me unusual details for my mind to cling to and it’s far more likely a story will stay in my mind.

    30. So Very Yes
    What I liked: I liked that you kept your prose simple – this is far more effective than using lots of big words and adjectives, in my opinion.
    What I thought could be improved: Would anyone actually say ‘Oh yes. So very yes!’?

    31. Perfect Pair
    What I liked: The ‘She couldn’t’ is a very nice bridge between the round 1 story and your continuation of it.
    What I thought could be improved: There are some minor spelling and punctuation issues here that you might be able to fix if you took another look at it.

    32. Hidden Agenda
    What I liked: The sting in the tail, very much! Nearly made my shortlist because of this.
    What I thought could be improved: I thought the first paragraph was wasted words, really – it was almost as if you could have told this story in 25 words less, but were trying to hit the full word count.

    34. Even Better
    What I liked: I like that this isn’t a plain and simple spanking story – the ‘twist’ at the end is quite sexy.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘Disappointed, I thanked him for his consideration’ sounds a bit formal and forced

    35. Successful Shopping
    What I liked: The first line, very much!
    What I thought could be improved: After the first line, the prose becomes a little overwritten, in my opinion.

    36. For the Tribe
    What I liked: The plot – very clever!
    What I thought could be improved: Careful not to repeat words when you have such a short piece – it would have been preferable not to use ‘heat’ twice.

    37. Delivered by Hand
    What I liked: This is quite hot, which surprised me, because actually having a father and son in the same sex scene is pretty uncomfortable.
    What I thought could be improved: I thought you needed to make it clearer which character was doing what – I got confused about who was speaking in places.

    38. Early encounter
    What I liked: This is a clever idea and you’ve pulled it off well – it could feel creepy that he turns up early, but you’ve managed to avoid that.
    What I thought could be improved: Sometimes the ideas in your paragraphs – especially paragraph 2 – feel a little disorganised. This might have been helped by one more read through before you sent it in.

    39. Office Daydream
    What I liked: That you’ve used the bulk of the word count for sex – it’s hard to do and still tell a story, but it’s a good approach when you’re supposed to be writing smut within a limited word count.
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry! Also, the title is ‘Office daydream’ but the original story was set in a lab, I think.

    40. Sweet Jane
    What I liked: The hugging is a nice touch – it tells us, subtly, that the Dom is a decent person here.
    What I thought could be improved: I found the dialogue a bit clunky and forced, sorry.

    41. Who is Watching
    What I liked: The open air cinema idea was a clever way to continue this, even though I’m not sure it completely works with the ‘country lane’ that the original story tells us they’re parked in.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘His cock painful as it enlarges in the confines of his jeans.’ By zooming straight in on his dick here, you make it seem almost disembodied – it’s not dissimilar to porn where all you see is cocks and cunts, no faces. Works for some people, I’m sure, but not for me, I’m afraid.

    42. Monster Hunter
    What I liked: The last line made me laugh out loud – nice!
    What I thought could be improved: There are some minor spelling and punctuation issues here that you might be able to fix if you took another look at it.

    43. Arranged Marriage
    What I liked: The idea of two people who don’t like each other but are forced to marry and end up having incredible chemistry is very hot to me.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m afraid I was really quite confused about what was happening in places here. Also, the leap from finding him loathsome to arousing happens without much explanation!

    44. Life After Death
    What I liked: The idea of the mourners parting to let them pass is very visually effective – I was able to really conjure an image of it in my mind.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘Gorgeous young arse’ made me feel that the male protagonist was much older than the woman, and made it seem almost creepy, rather than sexy.

    47. Special Delivery
    What I liked: It’s nice to see a female character with lots and lots of agency like this!
    What I thought could be improved: She’s so aggressive I think I might be scared of her if I were him, though?

    48. My Kalika
    What I liked: I liked the frequent use of colour – made it very easy for me to picture the scene.
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    49. Inner Monologue Failure
    What I liked: I liked the phrase ‘The glitter in her eyes pales the baubles around her neck.’
    What I thought could be improved: The direction your story takes is the exact direction we expect based on the original story – it would have been nice if you’d added an element of surprise.

    50. The Kinetoscope
    What I liked: This is a really clever story – it’s sad, but the description is really very good.
    What I thought could be improved: I couldn’t give this points because to me it was inspired by the round 1 story, but didn’t follow on from it – largely because of your first paragraph.

    51. Bless Me
    What I liked: This is certainly an original story, although I imagine it’ll be more some people’s kink than others.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘Whimper’ doesn’t sit quite right with me – it feels like she’s supposed to be the one with the power in this scenario and this makes her seem weak and undermines that power.

    52. Incomplete Contrition
    What I liked: I really like the first paragraph and the way his ‘Next!’ breaks into her thoughts. This very nearly made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: The way you ended this piece weakened it for me. The ‘Next’ is very memorable, what comes after it is less so.

    53. The journey
    What I liked: The repetition of ‘tick, tock’ from the original story. It ties the two pieces together nicely.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m afraid I can’t really picture this, so it’s a struggle for me to envisage what’s happening.

    54. Invitation
    What I liked: The dialogue, although I can’t imagine a mailman actually saying this(!), does come across as sounding quite natural
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    55. The Sexiest Smile
    What I liked: Why does she leave at the end? It wasn’t so much that I liked that she did, but it added an aura of mystery to your story.
    What I thought could be improved: ‘Tightened her vaginal walls’ didn’t read very naturally to me, and it jarred enough to jerk me out of the story.

    56. To Your Taste
    What I liked: Most of your writing is confident and clearly written, and the dialogue is nice.
    What I thought could be improved: The final paragraph weakens this considerably, because it stops being people doing things and starts just being organs.

    57. Yours, Sir
    What I liked: The dialogue is nice and natural.
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    58. Inspiring Desperation
    What I liked: The bit about what it’s like to have someone have a crush on you – I could fully believe that it would feel like this.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t think that some of your turns of phrase – ‘recipient of a crush’, ‘kept a bookmark on her’ read particularly naturally – perhaps you could have rephrased these?

    59. Art of Desire
    What I liked: Some of the language in this is really lovely and sexy, such as ‘I begin to stroke her form onto the paper.’ Almost made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t really understand what the dynamic between these three characters was, I’m afraid – I wondered if you’d perhaps tried to do too much with a limited word count.

    60. Entrapment
    What I liked: Great depiction of the character – really detailed and effective.
    What I thought could be improved: I hated the use of the verb ‘projects’ I’m afraid – it really didn’t work for me and jarred me out of what was otherwise a very strong piece of writing.

    61. The Blended Composition
    What I liked: This is a lovely, sensual piece of writing. Almost made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: The ending felt slightly try-hard to me, as if you didn’t really know how to neatly round off.

    62. Killer Climax
    What I liked: It’s brave to have done what you’ve done here, and continue the story from the viewpoint of a completely different character, and the story is sexy. Almost made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: I thought maybe you’d tried to do too much with a short word count – I had to read it a few times to understand the relationship between the round 1 story and your continuation of it.

    63. She owns me
    What I liked: I like the twist that she wants her shoes to be licked – I found this surprising and I thought it worked.
    What I thought could be improved: The first paragraph is a touch overwritten – the ones that follow it are much clearer.

    64. Holding Off
    What I liked: I liked the dynamic between your characters and I thought your dialogue read we
    What I thought could be improved: I wasn’t sure that ‘drink olive’ sounded very natural – perhaps you could have rephrased this?

    67. A Simple Request
    What I liked: I like the second paragraph a lot – I think it is very sexy.
    What I thought could be improved: There are some minor spelling and punctuation issues here that you might be able to fix if you took another look at it. Also, does talc taste pleasant?

    68. Hands that Bind
    What I liked: That you’ve used the bulk of the word count for sex – it’s hard to do and still tell a story, but it’s a good approach when you’re supposed to be writing smut within a limited word count.
    What I thought could be improved: What is the link between the story in round one and the reference to his hands in the first paragraph? This doesn’t seem to follow on very naturally.

    69. The Assignment
    What I liked: The scenario, student infatuated by teacher, is one I’ve always found hot.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m not a fan of these kind of continuations, I’m afraid – you could have continued any of the round one stories in this way, so it feels like a bit of a cheat to me.

    70. Taking turns
    What I liked: The fact that you’d included plausible details such as her whole body being tanned apart from her breasts.
    What I thought could be improved: Be careful not to switch from one character’s point of view to another too much.

    71. You surprised me
    What I liked: The way the boss talks – I would certainly be seduced by this!
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    72. Food Glorious Food
    What I liked: This made me smile – it is a nice piece of writing.
    What I thought could be improved: I don’t think it’s sexy, I’m afraid.

    73. A Caged Anointing
    What I liked: I really like the first paragraph – I found it very easy to imagine your characters talking in the kitchen like this.
    What I thought could be improved: Some of your phrasing, such as ‘I cup his downward face,’ read a little clumsily to me – perhaps you could have reworded this?

    74. That escalated quickly
    What I liked: That you’ve used the bulk of the word count for sex – it’s hard to do and still tell a story, but it’s a good approach when you’re supposed to be writing smut within a limited word count.
    What I thought could be improved: The title warns us, but this does escalate very quickly – and it loses its sexiness for me because of that.

    75. Wartime Lament
    What I liked: Your second paragraph is really well written and exactly my kink – your story almost made it to my shortlist because of this.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t really think it was believable that he didn’t even care to guess why she might be crying – seemed very obvious to me!

    76. Desire’s Edge
    What I liked: This is very, very sexy – it very nearly made my shortlist.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t really understand the ending – how does he intend to scare her, because presumably he’s not intending to stab her for real?

    77. Parent Teacher Confidential
    What I liked: The description in the second paragraph is very nice – I could envisage this as a movie scene.
    What I thought could be improved: This escalated too quickly for me, or rather, I was bothered by the lack of responses from the teacher.

    79. Prima Voluptas
    What I liked: That you referenced the buyer’s smirk from the round one story – this links the two pieces of writing together nicely.
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    80. She’s Perfect
    What I liked: I liked the multi-sensory nature of your writing – the reference to the taste of blood was effective.
    What I thought could be improved: There’s nothing particularly fresh or surprising about the plot – sorry!

    81. Straight Shooter
    What I liked: This is a cute and original story – it was lovely to read, and it made me smile, and it nearly made my shortlist because of this.
    What I thought could be improved: It’s just not sexy enough to really be considered smut – I couldn’t imagine being able to get off to this.

    83. Realized anticipation
    What I liked: I imagine this story would be popular with a lot of readers, as you’ve written a detailed description of something that I know turns lots of people on.
    What I thought could be improved: This feels more of a scene than a story to me.

    84. Art Lover
    What I liked: The phrase ‘The soft scratching of charcoal on paper teeth’ is very vivid and effective.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t like the ending, I’m afraid – his orgasm seemed almost comedic to me.

    85. Classical Training
    What I liked: I found this really very sexy – probably because the idea of ballet terrifies me, and having to do it naked/being shown how to do it by a naked man taps into my humiliation kink.
    What I thought could be improved: I didn’t really see how this story and the original were linked. Are these ballet dancers at an orgy, or has a ballet rehearsal turned into an orgy for some reason?

    86. Broken by looks
    What I liked: I wanted to know what would happen next between these two characters.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m not really sure why you’ve repeated ‘However’ three times in this piece, especially as it doesn’t really make sense to me at the start of paragraph two.

    87. Eulogy Reverie
    What I liked: Your last line rounds the story off nicely.
    What I thought could be improved: I’m very confused about the logistics here – maybe it’s because it’s supposed to be his reverie, but I found it weird that she was speaking and behind him squeezing his cock at the same time.

    88. Pride and Avarice
    What I liked: This is really easy to read, confident writing – almost made my shortlist. Good work! Also, clever title!
    What I thought could be improved: The plot wasn’t quite as fresh or surprising as I’d have liked it to be – sorry!

  30. I’m going to use the same formula for the three stories I liked versus the three that didn’t quite work for me. The three I liked were also of course the three I voted for.

    My top 3:
    63) She Owns Me – I guess you’ve hit on a personal kink with this one as it’s not necessarily the actions in this piece that get me, but the use of control. The piece is believable and the reactions of the characters really help to sell it. Great job!
    76) Desire’s Edge – I loved the different take on the prompt you chose, and also the way the protagonist discovers something more about himself in the process. I don’t know why, but the character’s realisation got me hot under the collar. Well written too!
    78) The Mailman’s Wife – I’ve really got to give props to you for this one as ‘The Letter’ was my first round piece and I loved your continuation! You managed to keep true to the original, while also taking it in a wonderful direction of your own. Seriously well done!

    3 that didn’t quite work for me:
    53) The Journey – A couple of past/present tense changes brought me out of this one unfortunately as I actually quite enjoyed your story. ‘Will she follows through’ was one and ‘Red stilettos awaits him’, was another (I believe it should respectively be ‘Will she follow through’ and ‘Red stilettos await him’). I think with another edit though, this would be a really solid piece!
    55) The Sexiest Smile – I was drawn out of this one by a single line I’m afraid. When you wrote “Goosebumps formed like his fingers and not his gaze traced down to her breasts.” it took me some time to decipher the meaning of this sentence and so I was drawn out of the story. I’m not sure whether punctuation is missing or if a word change is required, but it distracted me from the rest of the piece. Loved the concept though!
    86) Broken By Looks – It was the use of the word ‘however’ in this piece that drew me out of the story. Repetition of a word with intent works if it adds meaning to the piece, but in this instance I felt it fell short of the mark. I believe that it was used to show the protagonists’ indecisive state of mind, but I feel like this could have been done in another manner while still keeping the heart of the story. It’s a shame because I loved the rising tension between the characters!

    These comments are just my opinion so please take them with a dose of salts! 🙂

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